Prophecy Part Two: The Calm and the Storm
by Meghan Elizabeth
Summary: The Prophecy isn't over yet and Vicki Ann struggles to with the help of some unexpected friends, as her world comes crashing down (TNG/DS9)
1. Default Chapter

Title: Prophecy Part Two-The Calm and the Storm   
Author: Meghan Elizabeth   
Series: Crossover- TNG/DS9   
Part: NEW 1/?   
Rating: PG-13   
Codes: (TNG) R, T, P, Q (DS9) B, K, Ez   
  
Notes: To mention any relationship codes would give away part of the  
story. Also, the only people mentioned in the codes are those that have  
significant roles. Other characters from both DS9 and TNG appear in the story  
for a shorter length of time.   
  
Disclaimer- Paramount owns all but Victorianna Leonard, Gerard, and  
all other people places, ships, etc. not mentioned anywhere in the  
Star Trek universe before.   
  
Feedback: Please send all types of feedback   
(meghanelizabeth@crosswinds.net)   
  
Summary: The Prophecy isn't over yet and Vicki Ann struggles to  
maintain her sanity, with the help of some unexpected friends, as her world comes  
crashing down.   
  
Prologue   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
Jadzia thought that you might be able to help me with a medical  
problem I encountered a few months ago and am still working on.  
Attached are my notes. Let me know if you have any trouble  
deciphering my abbreviations.   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
It was nice to hear from you. I had no trouble deciphering your notes.  
Unfortunately, despite all the information on the Blight that you sent  
me, I have no ideas for you. Maybe you should just be content with  
the fact that the children will survive, even if their parents don't. I  
know that's small consolation, but we can't save everyone. Fate  
won't let us. Hope all is well on the station. Say hello to Jadzia.   
  
Love,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
Thanks for your letter. Your words helped me feel a little better. I'm still working on it,  
though. Whenever I have some spare time in the infirmary, I run a few simulations.  
Although lately, I haven't had much spare time. Leeta is getting very impatient. I never  
have time to spend with her. Odo was ill. I'm sure you heard about it before your visit to  
the station. He had trouble maintaining shape and so we took him back to the Founders  
and he was exiled for killing a shape- shifter.   
  
They made him human and left him to us. I am definitely getting what I wanted when I  
took this assignment: frontier medicine. Sorry for dumping all of my troubles on you. Hope  
all is well on the Enterprise.   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
Sounds like you have been busy. Just make sure that you take some time for yourself. You  
won't be any good to anyone, Leeta, Sisko, or your patients, if you're running yourself  
ragged. At the risk of sounding like a doctor, make sure you get enough sleep, eat enough,  
and take some time, preferably at the end of the day, to relax and forget about the  
infirmary. I'm sure Leeta can help with that. Don't worry about your last letter. I don't  
mind hearing about your problems. In fact, I like your letters. Not that I'm a sadist and  
enjoy listening to other people's misfortune. It's just that except for Jadzia, I don't really  
have many people that I correspond with. It's nice. Although, it would be nicer if once in a  
while, you had some good news! Love,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
I'm not having any luck on your suggestion for good news. Besides the trip with Jake I told  
you about when you called a few weeks ago, I took a trip to Risa with Leeta, Worf and  
Jadzia. Besides, the fiasco with Worf, which I'm sure Jadzia told you about, Leeta decided  
to end our relationship. We both wanted different things. She wouldn't mind settling down  
and I definitely don't want that. It's funny. Before I came to the station, I was ready for  
that. I thought I was anyway. But, now I've decided that having a family would put them  
in the unfair position of having to worry about me while I'm on duty. At least if I'm alone, I  
only have myself to worry about. Miles says it's worth it, but I don't know. I just wish I  
wasn't so unlucky in relationships. Sure, I don't want to get married, but everyone needs  
companionship. Everyone needs someone to tell their troubles to, to encourage you when  
you need it and love you for who you are. I just wish I could find someone like that. I'm  
starting to believe that it only happens in fairy tales.   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
I'm sorry to hear about you and Leeta. But cheer up, I'm sure there's someone out there  
for you, Julian. You just haven't found her yet. Just stay away from Jadzia. A jealous Worf  
would not be a pretty sight.   
  
For the moment, take comfort in your friends. They are exactly what you describe. You  
tell your troubles to them, they encourage you when you need it and love you for who you  
are. We have a saying on Betazed (and I believe Earth has a similar one), "Rich is the man  
who has friends." So count your blessings and quit complaining about what you don't have  
and start appreciating what you do.   
  
Love,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
Leave it to you to give my ego the swift kick it needed. I am lucky. I do have a lot of  
wonderful friends. Did you also happen to notice that when you were describing qualities  
of friends, you were describing yourself? I do appreciate all the encouragement and  
support you given me since we started corresponding. Thank you. As for staying away  
from Jadzia, you've got a point there. A jealous Worf would not be a pretty sight. Besides,  
I've decided to stay away from attached women. Know of any who won't die of boredom  
when I ramble about medicine out of nervousness?   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
You're welcome. And thank you for counting me as a friend. I'm glad you're feeling better.  
Although, I don't understand your comment about rambling about medicine when you're  
nervous. What have you got to be nervous about? You're attractive, charming, warm,  
caring, and brilliant. And I stopped myself before I inflated your ego too much! As for the  
rambling about medicine, maybe you should date someone in the field. A doctor   
perhaps, so you wouldn't be bored intellectually. And no, I don't know any.   
  
Love,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann   
If only you weren't attached. You fit the profile perfectly: beautiful, intelligent, charming  
and a doctor. By the way, thanks for your vote of confidence. It boosted my ego  
tremendously. Although, it annoyed Jadzia. She said I looked 'smug.' And why not? I've got  
a wonderful woman like you complementing me. You won't be receiving any letters from me  
in a while,I'm going to a burn treatment conference and according to the itinerary, I'm  
going to be very busy. Although, if you wish, you can continue to write to me so that I  
have something to look forward to when I get back.   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
I should stop writing to you after that last letter. The last thing I need is you chasing  
after me like you did Jadzia. I assume you're back from the burn conference. It's been over  
a month and I haven't heard from you, except that day I called and you couldn't talk  
because you were very busy in the infirmary. I know how that feels from assisting Beverly  
and my work on the Goddard. And by the way, I'm no longer attached. But, don't get any  
ideas!   
  
Love,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
I don't know why I'm writing to you. Maybe I just need to tell someone the hell I've been  
through. It all started when I went to the burn treatment conference. I went to bed one  
night and woke up in a Jem'Hadar internment camp. General Martok was there, along with  
Enbran Tain, as well as a Romulan and a Breen. We were kept in a cell, but were permitted  
to roam the compound as long as we didn't try to leave the atmospheric dome. After we  
were there for a while, they cut back out rations and I complained. I was placed in solitary  
for my trouble.   
  
They put me in a very small cell for five days without water, food or even a threatening  
visit. Then, finally they let me out and when I got back to the cell, Worf and Garak were  
there. We managed to salvage the life support system transmitter Tain had constructed  
and contact the runabout. We managed to escape because the Jem'Hadar had obviously  
thought we wouldn't escape and had left the   
runabout in orbit. We're on our way back to the station now.   
  
It's kind of hard to believe that for a month and a half, a changeling replaced me and no  
one noticed. It's very disconcerting knowing that you're replaceable. Did anyone notice  
that he was different? And why not? Perhaps if you and him had been in the same room,  
you might have noticed, but it's hard to read someone's mind through letters. I'd better  
end this letter now because we're approaching the station. Besides that, I've already  
dumped enough of my troubles on you.   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
I can't answer for anyone else, but I didn't notice because we barely spoke. After a few  
weeks, I called the station. I had assumed that you were   
busy in the infirmary. Your replacement said a quick hello and rambled something about an  
emergency in the infirmary and that he would get back to me later. He never did. I  
thought something was wrong, but I didn't have time to ask him. You're letter explained  
why he was in such a hurry to say goodbye. He would have known that I would have know  
who he was and wouldn't dare risk being exposed.   
I'm very touched that you chose to share your experiences with me. You are a very strong  
person, Julian and I'm glad to have you as my friend. If you ever feel like talking, let me  
know.   
  
Love,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
This will probably be your last letter from me. I'm assuming Jadzia told you about the  
incident with Dr. Zimmerman. It's fine for people like her and Miles to accept what I am,  
but for a doctor, it's impossible. You know the consequences of genetic engineering. I  
understand if you don't wish to continue our correspondence. I wish you well in all your  
endeavors.   
  
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
You have to be either incredibly stupid or incredibly naive to think that I would end our  
friendship based on the fact that you're genetically engineered. And since your intelligence  
is practically genius, I think it must be that latter. Because of your engineering, you have  
made yourself believe that you're not worthy of genuine love, whether it be love of friends  
or romance. That's probably why you get nervous around women. You didn't choose to be  
engineered, so why should I hold it against you? Besides, I'm not friends with you because  
you can score a bull's eye three time in a row or because you were second your class. I'm  
your friend because you're a wonderful person; caring, warm, generous, charming, funny,  
and loyal. (I'm repeating myself on some of this). I seriously hope you can believe that and  
will continue to write me.   
Love (Always),   
  
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
You don't know how happy I was to receive your letter. You also don't know how right you  
were. I am truly blessed to have you as a friend. Jadzia was telling the truth in all her  
praise of you. I apologize for sounding so sentimental, but almost losing everything really  
puts things into perspective. As you suggested once before, I'm counting my blessings.   
The next time you're in the area, stop by the station. I'd love to see you again and I'm  
sure Jadzia would too.   
  
Love,   
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
I'd love to stop by and see you and Jadzia. It's just a matter of finding the time. Things  
are crazy here. They just keep sending us on diplomatic mission after diplomatic mission.  
I'm getting lots of flying time at least.Although, I am starting to miss medicine. I think part  
of the reason I turned to flying was to disconnect myself from Gerard. After all, medicine  
was a major part of my life when I was with him. I used it to cover up what he did to me.  
After a while, medicine started to remind me of him, which,of course, I did not want. But,  
now that I've dealt with my past, I think I'm ready to go back to medicine. Permanently.  
Besides, hearing all the stories about your amazing medical feats would make anyone want  
to be a doctor. I think you're renewing my enthusiasm. It's time for my bridge shift. Tell  
Jadzia and Worf hello.   
  
Love Always,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
I haven't heard from you in a while. I assumed that you were busy, but Jadzia and I are  
starting to get worried. She hasn't heard from you either. Please write when you get the  
chance and let us know that everything is alright.   
  
Love,   
Julian   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
Thanks for contacting Jadzia and I and telling us about the situation with Q. I can  
understand why you've been out of touch. Having a psychotic omnipotent being trying to  
kill you and Q would be enough to keep you busy. Are you coming to the wedding? Jadzia  
would love to see you and so would I.   
  
Love,   
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
I wish I could come to the wedding, but Starfleet is sending me to a medical conference.  
I'm absolutely thrilled. (Can you hear the sarcasm?) I'm sending a gift and a message to  
Jadzia. Please give Jadzia a hug and a kiss (on the cheek!) for me and give her my love. If  
you feel awkward about it, you can do the same to Worf too, if you want.   
  
Love Always,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
I passed up the offer to give Worf a hug and a kiss (he would have thrown me through the  
bulkhead), but I did tell him hello. I also took some pictures for you. They're attached,  
along with a video. If you've never seen a Klingon wedding, you're in for a surprise. But,  
you really haven't experienced a Klingon ceremony until you've participated in a Klingon  
'bachelor party.' Just think about it. Lot's of blood, fasting, and of course, PAIN! Little did  
Miles and I know what we were getting ourselves into.   
As for the ceremony, it is indescribable. You have to watch the video to see what I mean.  
By the way, Jadzia loved the gift. Although, Worf didn't seem too amused. A dermal  
regenerator. I wish I'd thought of it. She and Worf send their thanks. I guess it's the  
thought that counts. How was the conference? I hope you weren't bored to death. Hope  
all is well on the Enterprise.   
  
Love,   
Julian   
  
Dear Julian,   
Thanks for your letter, the video and pictures of the wedding. That was very sweet of  
you. The 'bachelor party' sounded fun. By the way, I loved the part where you and the  
Chief attacked Worf. Very interesting. The wedding itself was interesting as well. Jadzia  
looked beautiful, although, I won't be using the same outfit for my wedding. The  
conference was boring, but I got through it. Things are normal on the Enterprise. We've  
been mostly doing supply runs. So far, nothing remotely near the front lines. Although I  
don't know why. We're the flagship, after all. Not that I want to fight, you understand. I  
guess I should be quiet and count my blessings, like I tell you, huh? Hope all is well on the  
station.   
  
Love Always,   
Vicki Ann   
  
Dear Vicki Ann,   
Wouldn't you attack Worf after that 'bachelor party?' And what was wrong with Jadzia's  
wedding dress? I'm just kidding. I assume you heard about the incident with the  
genetically engineered group from the Institute. Sometimes, my intelligence flies out the  
window and I let my feelings about people judge my actions. I did that with them. They  
were wrong and I took everything they said as fact. No prediction can ever be right  
because the future changes everyday. I hate this war. It's not about anything but  
protecting our home. I'd like it to mean more, but it doesn't. And I'm scared out of my  
mind. Scared   
for myself, for my patients, for my friends, for anyone who comes in contact with the  
Dominion's wrath. But, as you said, we should count our blessings. While we can.   
  
Love,   
Julian   
Dear Julian,   
I'm coming to the station. Deanna suggested I take some time off to deal with Jadzia's  
death. Unfortunately, I had to wait until we were nearby. I'm catching a ride from Earth. I  
should arrive in a few days.   
  
Love Always,   
Vicki Ann   
  
  
Chapter 1   
  
Riker stood in the shuttle bay, waiting for Vicki Ann to come out of the shuttle. The door  
opened and she stepped out with all of her luggage. She   
smiled when she saw him. He took some of her luggage. "Welcome back, Doc,"   
he told her. He kissed her, but she pulled away quickly. "I have to speak to the captain.  
It's kind of important."   
  
He straightened up, acting unaffected by her distant behavior. "Sure, let's   
go."   
  
Vicki Ann emerged from the captain's ready room. Riker looked up at her questioningly. She  
didn't see his expression or she chose to ignore it because she turned toward the captain.  
"Oh, I forgot to ask you captain, how   
did you like my nephew?"   
  
Picard looked at her, confused. "Nephew?"   
  
"Little q. Q and Q made me an honorary aunt."   
  
Picard nodded and frowned. "He's just like his father."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "That's what I said!"   
  
Riker came up behind her. "When did you see Q?"   
  
"He came to the lecture. He found it rather amusing. We talked for a while   
and he told me everything that happened with Q. We had a long talk in general before he  
left. He apologized for missing Admiral Thompson's preliminary speech on the Q. He said he  
had been dealing with Continuum matters."   
  
Picard nodded. "Warning us about the barrier."   
  
Vicki Ann turned back to Picard. "I have some unpacking to do, captain, so   
if you don't wish me to stay. . ."   
  
Picard nodded. "Yes, your leave is officially over tomorrow. Go ahead."   
  
Vicki Ann turned and left.   
  
Riker, obviously confused, sat back down at his post.   
  
Vicki Ann sat down on her bed. She glanced at her night stand and her eyes   
rested on the picture of her and Riker at the party after the trial. She   
felt tears coming to her eyes, but she knew that it had to be done. Riker   
didn't really love her and she couldn't let either of them live a lie. She   
wished Q had told her this would happen, but he wasn't allowed to divulge   
the secrets of the universe to mere mortals. She held the picture close to   
her heart and fell back onto the bed and cried.   
  
Riker rang the chime for Vicki Ann's quarters. She had been avoiding him   
all day and he wanted to know why. He rang the chime five times. "Computer, where is Dr.  
Troi?"   
  
"Dr. Troi is in her quarters."   
  
She must have known it was him. Riker used his authorization code to enter.   
"Vicki Ann, where are you? I want to know what's going on. Why are you avoiding me?"   
  
"Coming," her sweet voice called from the bedroom. She sounded normal.   
She   
must have been trying very hard to sound normal because when she entered the   
room, Riker could tell she had been crying. "What's up?"   
  
He walked over to her and ran his fingers through her hair. "What's wrong?"   
  
She pulled away from him. "We need to talk." She sat down on the couch.   
"About us."   
  
He sat down next to her, but she moved away a little. "Why? What happened   
in San Francisco? Did Q say something to you?"   
  
She shook her head. "We talked, that's all. He helped me figure some things out though. I  
did a lot of thinking in San Francisco." She took a   
deep breath, trying to gather all the strength she could. "I can't let you   
do this."   
  
"Do what?"   
  
"This. Us. I can't let you lie to yourself."   
  
"What am I lying to myself about?"   
  
"Your feelings about me."   
  
"What are you talking about? I love you, Vicki Ann."   
  
"Just listen to me, Will. This relationship has been nothing more than a   
replacement for Deanna."   
  
"Deanna?"   
  
"Yes, Deanna. I understand now that you love her and can never be happy with someone  
else, no matter how much you try to convince yourself."   
"I told you, I fell in love with you, not an image of Deanna. You're different from her."   
  
"You got involved with me because I'm Deanna's sister and that gave you a   
tie to her. You rationalized it by lying to yourself and saying that you   
loved me for me, not because I reminded you of Deanna. But I did remind you   
of Deanna. I can't let either of us continue this lie. It's not fair to   
you and it's not fair to me. If we weren't involved, you could rekindle your relationship with  
Deanna. And it's not fair for me to be in a relationship where I'm not really loved. I've had  
enough experience with   
that already. Please, let's just end it now before it goes to far."   
  
Riker nodded slowly. "I'm sorry, Vicki Ann, I never meant to hurt you."   
  
"I know."   
  
He kissed her on the forehead and whispered, "Thank you for helping me figure all of this  
out."   
  
She nodded.   
  
"Are you all right?"   
  
"I'm fine. I just need some time alone."   
  
Riker nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow on the bridge."   
  
It had been a week since their talk and Vicki Ann and Riker hadn't spoken to   
each other, except for normal bridge orders. Riker had sensed that she'd   
needed some time to work out her feelings and get used to the possibility of   
Riker and Deanna. He hadn't told Deanna and he didn't think Vicki Ann had   
told her either. He had told everyone that it just wasn't meant to be and   
ending it at that. He was now sitting at a table in the corner of Ten-Forward, sipping a  
drink and trying to determine the next course of action. The doors opened and a woman  
entered. She walked over to him, smiling. She sat down across from him and said, "Hello,  
Commander."'   
  
He grinned at her. "Hello, Doc. Is everything all right between us or are   
you going to place some Betazoid curse on me?"   
  
"You should know better. I don't use curses. If I want something bad to   
happen to someone, I do it myself," she replied, her eyes twinkling. She   
turned serious. "No, everything's fine. We're still friends. It's hard to   
stay mad at someone if you can read their mind."   
  
"I'm glad," he replied.   
  
"So," she asked him. "What are you doing about Deanna?"   
  
"What do you mean?"   
  
"How are you going to win her back?"   
  
Riker shook his head. "You don't know how much I wish you weren't empathic   
or telepathic."   
  
"Yes, I do."   
  
Beverly Crusher glanced at the door when she heard it open. She gasped when   
she saw who had entered. Vicki Ann was standing there, wincing in pain and   
cradling a broken arm. Beverly motioned for Vicki Ann to come over to her.   
"What happened?"   
  
Vicki Ann made a face. "I tried Worf's calisthenics program."   
  
"Vicki Ann!" Beverly scolded as she fixed Vicki Ann's arm.   
  
"I know."   
  
"That isn't like you. Is there anything going on?"   
  
"No."   
  
"Vicki Ann, you're lying to me."   
  
"Beverly!"   
  
"I'm serious. What's going on?"   
  
"Nothing." She glanced at the door, which had just opened.. Commander Riker entered. He  
waved to her and she replied with a smile and a wave.   
  
As   
soon as he was out of her sight, the smile faded.   
  
Beverly noticed this. "What happened?"   
  
"What do you mean 'what happened?' What makes you think anything happened?"   
  
"Ever since you and Will started seeing each other, you both have been all   
smiles. For the past week, you both have been all frowns. And just now,   
you faked a smile."   
  
"I did not!"   
  
"You're lying to me and to yourself, Vicki Ann. What happened?"   
  
"Can we go in your office.? I don't want to talk in front of all these people. Actually, I  
don't want to talk about it at all, but I know you won't rest until I tell you everything."   
  
"You got it. Come on." As they walked to Beverly's office, Beverly said to   
Nurse Ogawa, "Alyssa, if anyone needs me, I'll be in my office."   
  
They walked into Beverly's office and Vicki Ann sat down across from Beverly.   
  
Beverly looked at Vicki Ann. "Well?"   
  
"You do understand I am doing this under duress? If they ask you later if I   
came to you willingly, you will say you forced me to confess, right?"   
  
"Confess? What did you do, murder someone?"   
  
"No, but I did do something almost as bad. Okay, let me start from the beginning. After my  
lecture in San Francisco, I had gone back to my apartment. I had gotten a subspace from  
Will, saying hello. I was going to   
respond when Q and his. . . . family showed up. After a while, Q's wife got   
bored and left with little q. Q and I talked. Mostly just general stuff.   
Catching up. Why he settled down. How things were going with Will. Anyway, I told him  
that I had received a subspace from Will. I sensed something weird from Q and I asked him  
about it. He reminded me of how Will   
had gone after Deanna while she was with Worf. That got me thinking. I finally realized  
that the only reason Will was with me was because of Deanna. I reminded him of her.   
Even if it was slight, it was enough. He loves her, Beverly, and he could   
never love anyone else. He can lie to himself and convince himself so absolutely that he  
would pass a polygraph test, but he wouldn't really.   
  
He   
did that with me. He convinced himself that he loved me for me and not because I was  
Deanna's sister, but he didn't. At first when I told Will, he   
denied it. Then, eventually, he admitted that he had done it without realizing it. The best  
thing for us to do was break up."   
  
"Wow. How do you feel about this?"   
  
"I'm okay with it. I probably knew all along, but didn't want to admit it."   
  
Beverly eyed her. "Okay, Vicki Ann. I know you probably told Will that you're okay with it,  
but how do you really feel?"   
  
Vicki Ann stood up and paced. "How do I feel? I told you, it's okay. I   
understand why he did it. I can't hold that against him."   
  
"Vicki Ann."   
  
"What?"   
  
"Stop lying to yourself."   
  
Vicki Ann turned away from Beverly. She didn't want Beverly to see her tears. "I'm not  
lying to myself." Her voice was shaking. "RaBeem."   
  
"What?"   
  
"It's a Betazoid word. It means 'I understand.' It's one of our main beliefs."   
  
"Oh. Why did you bring it up?"   
  
"Because it applies here."   
  
"Does it?"   
  
"Do you know what, Beverly? I'm tired of understanding! It's all I've ever   
done. When someone does something bad to me, I defend them. I say 'I understand why  
you did it.' I let people walk all over me and I don't do   
anything about it. I just say 'I understand.' Well, I don't! I don't understand how he could  
do something like that and not know it!"   
  
"How do you feel about it?" Beverly asked, sounding like a psychologist.   
  
"I'm angry! I'm angry at him and worst of all, I'm angry at her! She strung him along all  
these years instead of ending it. Even when she was   
engaged to Worf, Will still hoped that he and Deanna would get back together. And what  
happens if they don't? He'll have wasted his entire life waiting for someone who was never  
coming back to him."   
  
"I can see why you're angry."   
  
"I'm not supposed to, though. I'm supposed to understand."   
  
"Betazoids are supposed to understand, but you're human, too."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. Her comm badge beeped. "Dr. Troi here."   
  
"Dr. Troi, there is a subspace message coming in for you from a Dr. Bashir," Lt. Stirland  
told Vicki Ann.   
  
"I'll take it in my quarters."   
  
"He says it's urgent."   
  
Vicki Ann turned to Beverly. "Do you mind?"   
  
Beverly shook her head. "No." She got up from the desk and went out into   
the other room.   
  
"Patch it through to Dr. Crusher's office." Vicki Ann sat down at Beverly's desk and Julian  
Bashir's face popped up on the viewer. Vicki Ann   
smiled. "Hello, Julian."   
  
Julian's face was grim. "They wanted to send you a standard message, but I   
thought it would be better if I told you."   
  
Vicki Ann swallowed. "Told me what?"   
  
"While Captain Sisko was away on the Defiant, he left Jadzia in charge of   
the station. A Cardassian broke into the shrine where she was and attacked   
her."   
  
Vicki Ann gasped and covered her mouth.   
  
Julian continued, "We managed to save the symbiont. But we couldn't do anything about  
Jadzia."   
  
Tears welling up in her eyes, she whispered, "No."   
  
"I tried everything. Nothing could be done."   
  
Vicki Ann snapped out of it. "It wasn't your fault, Julian. When did this   
happen?"   
  
"While you were at the conference. I wasn't sure how to reach you-"   
  
"It's alright. I'm not sure I would have found time for a message. I probably wouldn't have  
read it until now anyway. How is Worf doing?"   
  
"Not well. No one is, of course, but he's the worst, obviously. For the   
moment, he's putting all his energy into the war with the Dominion, but I'm   
sure he'll be fine. He's Klingon; he's strong."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "That he is. Thank you for telling me, Julian. That was   
very thoughtful."   
  
He smiled. "You're welcome."   
  
"Tell Worf hello. I'll stop by and visit on my way home next month."   
  
"I'll tell him. Goodbye, Vicki Ann."   
  
"Goodbye, Julian." The viewer blinked off. The tears that Vicki Ann had he   
ld back for most of the conversation, rolled down her cheeks at warp speed.   
  
Beverly walked in. "Vicki Ann, are you finished? I need to- What happened?"   
  
Vicki Ann just shook her head and ran past Beverly. She continued down the   
hall. She ran right into Riker, who was coming back to sickbay. "Vicki Ann, what's wrong?"   
  
"Get away from me!" she screamed, pushing past him and down the hall.   
  
Beverly walked out into the hall.   
  
"What happened?" Riker asked her.   
  
Beverly shook her head. "I don't know. I don't know anything."   
  
Vicki Ann sat in the corner of Ten-Forward, sipping some synthehol. She wanted to forget  
who she was, where she was, and everything else. Especially about Riker and Deanna and  
especially about Jadzia. Just like   
Julian had said, it wasn't fair. Jadzia was such a nice person. She hadn't   
known Vicki Ann long when they spoke at the same Academy graduation. Jadzia   
had found out that it was Vicki Ann's birthday and had arranged a quick surprise party.  
They had become fast friends. True, they hadn't seen each   
other much, but they had kept in touch. Unfortunately, Vicki Ann had been   
unable to get away to attend the wedding, but she'd sent a gift and a personal message  
to Jadzia. And now she couldn't get away to go to the funeral. She'd just gotten back.  
She let the synthehol go to her head. She felt her spirits lift. She smiled and glanced out  
the window.   
  
Riker and Deanna walked into Ten-Forward. Riker had told Deanna that he and   
Vicki Ann had broken up, but not why. Deanna noticed Vicki Ann sitting in   
the corner.   
  
"Come on, let's go see what's wrong," Deanna told him. They walked over and   
Riker sat down across from Vicki Ann. Deanna said, "I'm getting a drink."   
  
"What's wrong, Vicki Ann?" Riker asked her.   
  
"Everything," she replied.   
  
"Is this about us?"   
  
"Yes and no."   
  
"What do you mean?"   
  
"I mean that you aren't the only thing on my mind," she snapped.   
  
Riker seemed taken back.   
  
She continued, "My world doesn't revolve around you."   
  
Riker had never heard her sound this angry. "I never said-."   
  
"You didn't say it, but you think it. You think the entire universe revolves around you,   
William T. Riker. See that's what happens when you date a telepath;   
they   
know what you're thinking."   
  
"Then what is it?"   
  
"What do you care? All you care about is Deanna. Your entire world revolves around her.  
And you don't care who you hurt trying to get her back."   
  
"Vicki Ann-," he said, reaching to put his hand on her arm.   
  
"Leave me alone!"   
  
"But I'm your friend and I want to help you."   
  
"You are not my friend! Friends don't hurt each other. Friends don't use   
each other like you did. You want to know someone who was a friend? Jadzia   
Dax," she screamed, but she whispered Jadzia's name. "And she's dead! And   
I'm all alone. So why don't you go back to your precious Deanna and leave   
me alone! It's the way I am and it's the way I want to be."   
  
Deanna had just reached the table. She now stared at her sister in disbelief. The  
counselor kicked in and she put her hand on Vicki Ann's arm   
and said, "I'm sorry about Jadzia."   
  
Vicki Ann shook Deanna's arm off. "You want him? He's yours!" she snapped.   
She turned and stormed out of Ten-Forward.   
  
Deanna sat down at the table. "What was that all about?"   
  
Riker shook his head.   



	2. 2

Chapter 2   
  
Vicki Ann ran into her quarters. She shouldn't have let the synthehol go to her head. She  
had made an absolute fool of herself in Ten-Forward. She sat down on her bed and put her  
face in her hands. How could she let this happen? She was supposed to be the one in  
control of her emotions and she had let them run wild. She took her communicator off and  
placed it on the night stand. She picked up the picture of her and Riker. How stupid she  
had been. Had she really thought she could make someone forget their Imzadi?   
  
Rage boiled inside of her, which was something she hadn't felt very much before.  
Victorianna Leonard had always pretended to be content, so much that she began to  
believe she actually felt that way. She had spent her life dealing with and adapting to  
everything life threw at her. Until now. She had finally cracked. After all the years of  
abuse by Gerard, the situation with the Q, and her own anger from childhood at her  
biological parents, all of it had finally come to the surface. And for once in her life,  
Victorianna Leonard, now Troi, was truly angry. Not slightly upset and yet understanding.  
She was angry. And it scared her. Never before had her emotions gone out of control like  
this. The calm, collected doctor was losing control. And with that loss of control, went her  
sanity.   
  
She threw the picture across the room. It hit the wall and the glass shattered all over the  
floor. It didn't make her feel any better, although she had thought it would. Vicki Ann got  
up and walked over to the window. For the first time in her life, she felt lost. She was all  
alone in the universe. She had no Jadzia to send a subspace to, telling her that she had  
been transferred to the Enterprise, no one to tell her that they loved her and that she  
comprised their entire world. She had no one. Everyone was gone or had some tie to her  
anger. Part of her started to make 'what ifs.' What if she had gone back to the Continuum  
with Q? She would have never gotten involved with Will and she could have saved Jadzia.  
What if she had accepted the assignment on Voyager? She never would have know any of  
this and she might have been a happier person.   
  
No, she thought to herself. She would have missed Starfleet if she'd gone off with Q and if  
she'd gone on Voyager, she'd have missed Jadzia. That didn't matter now, though,  
because she missed Jadzia anyway. Vicki Ann put her face in her hands and cried. As she  
sat up and glanced out the window, she caught sight of her wrist. She was still wearing  
the silver bracelet Riker had given her. She had forgotten to take it off. She ran her  
fingers along the links. She took it off and held it in her hand. The door chimed. Vicki Ann  
quickly wiped her tears away. "Come in," she called. She figured it was Beverly coming to  
see what had happened earlier and to see how Vicki Ann was doing.   
  
Deanna entered. Very hesitantly. "Vicki Ann?"   
  
"What do you want?" Vicki Ann yelled from the bedroom.   
  
"I thought maybe you wanted to tell me what's going on."   
  
"Not particularly."   
  
"Well, I'm not really giving you a choice."   
  
"What if I don't tell you?"   
  
"Then I will be forced to go to Captain Picard and tell him that I believe you should be  
relieved of duty because of emotional instability."   
  
"The counselor is playing dirty now, is she?"   
  
Deanna sensed the anger in Vicki Ann's words. "I'm just doing my job. I'm trying to help  
you."   
  
"I don't need your help."   
  
Deanna sighed. "Vicki Ann, no one will tell me what's going on. All I know is that you're  
very angry with me and Will and you're dealing with a tremendous loss. Maybe if you'll tell  
me why, I can understand."   
  
Vicki Ann came out into the living room. "Stop analyzing me! You can't understand! You  
haven't lost two of your best friends. You haven't realized that your life for the past three  
months has been a lie. You are not losing control. Therefore, you cannot understand!"   
  
"Vicki Ann, I can try."   
  
"I wish everyone would stop trying to understand and mind their own business. This whole  
concept of understanding is a sham. I don't understand. I don't understand how someone  
could kill someone as sweet and innocent as Jadzia. I don't understand how Will could do  
what he did. And I don't understand how you can be so absolutely clueless as to what is  
going on around you? After all, it is all about you isn't it? Everything is about you."   
  
Deanna was stunned. "Me? What are you talking about?"   
  
"Oh come on, Deanna. I find it really hard to believe that you had absolutely no idea that  
it was all about you."   
  
"What is all about me?"   
  
"Everything! Everything where Will is concerned. It's all about you. Everything he does,  
everything he thinks, is about you!"   
  
"If everything was about me, then why has he been with you for the past three months?"   
  
"Don't you see, Deanna? When he was looking at me, he saw you. When he kissed me, he  
was thinking of you. Indirectly. I reminded him of you."   
  
Deanna gasped. "Vicki Ann, you have to be making this up."   
  
"I'm not! He admitted to it! After I told him that I'd figured it out."   
  
Deanna shook her head. "I don't believe this."   
  
"Believe it, Deanna. It's all about you."   
  
Vicki Ann had emphasized the last part, her words stinging Deanna like a slap across the  
face. "I'm sorry, but it wasn't my fault."   
  
"It wasn't? Even when you were engaged to Worf, he still hoped that the two of you  
would get back together. He went to Betazed to tell you how he felt. To try and win you  
back. He risked his life to save you. I think that indicates some feelings other than  
friendship! And you never said or did anything to make him think otherwise!"   
  
Deanna was starting to get angry. "Stop treating me as if I'm absolutely stupid!"   
  
"Well, it seems that way. You're absolutely oblivious to something that is as plain as the  
nose on your face!"   
  
"Well, it's not as if we haven't seen other people! I almost married Worf, remember?"   
  
"I know. You keep reminding everyone of that fact so that we'll think you don't have  
feelings for Will anymore."   
  
"I do not!"   
  
"Yes, you do! You love playing hard to get!"   
  
"Vicki Ann!"   
  
"Don't even deny it, Deanna." She walked over to Deanna and placed the bracelet in  
Deanna's hand. "Here, just take this and go. It was probably meant for you anyway." The  
door chimed. "Come in!"   
  
Riker entered.   
  
"Both of you, get out!" Vicki Ann screamed.   
  
Riker sighed. Then he got an idea. He crossed his arms and said, "I'm not leaving until we  
talk."   
  
Vicki Ann scowled at him. "Very funny. Now, leave!"   
  
Riker shook his head. "Sorry. Turnabout is fair play."   
  
"Too bad this isn't a game," Vicki Ann replied dryly.   
  
Riker decided to try a different tactic. He went over to Vicki Ann tried to move her into  
the other room. She resisted so he picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. She  
kicked her legs out, trying to get free, but he had a tight grip.   
  
"Let me go!"   
  
Riker shook his head. ""Sorry, Vicki Ann, but I'm stronger than you."   
  
Deanna had to try very hard not to laugh.   
  
Riker carried Vicki Ann into the bedroom and sat her down on the edge of the bed. She  
crossed her arms across her chest defiantly. She was absolutely furious with him. He didn't  
need to be empathic to figure that out. He pulled up a chair across from her and sat down.  
"Now we're going to talk."   
  
"No, we're not."   
  
"This sounds familiar. Come on, Vicki Ann, what happened? I thought things were okay  
between us."   
  
"I lied."   
  
"Obviously. Why?"   
  
"Because I've been taught to keep my emotions under control and being angry would  
violate that control."   
  
"You're allowed to be angry."   
  
"I know. . . . but I was afraid of losing control."   
  
"It's a little too late for that."   
  
Vicki Ann gave Riker a dirty look.   
  
"I'll tell you what I think happened. You never expressed your anger period. Ever.  
Remember you told me that when you were little, you thought that your biological parents  
had abandoned you? And that made you angry, but I'll bet you never expressed it. Same  
thing with Gerard, and the situation with the Q. The thing with us was your breaking point.  
And Jadzia's death didn't help, either. Do you agree with me or am I absolutely crazy?"   
  
"Did you ever consider becoming a ship's counselor?" she replied sarcastically.   
  
"Now, I want you to tell me how you felt when you found out about Deanna."   
  
"You really want to know?"   
  
Riker nodded.   
  
Vicki Ann slapped him.   
  
Riker, stunned, stared at her. "That wasn't what I meant. I wanted you to tell me, not hit  
me!"   
  
She shrugged. "It was my first reaction."   
  
"Are you finished?"   
  
"Not really, but I don't think I'm much of a match for you."   
  
"Well, try. Do what you wanted to do before. Say what you wanted to say. Tell me how  
you felt."   
  
Vicki Ann stood up and paced. "Well, I first I did what I was supposed to do, understand.  
Rationalize it. Then after Julian contacted me about Jadzia, my emotional control broke  
down. All the anger I had bottled up over the years was suddenly boiling inside me. I  
wanted to somehow make you feel as bad as I did."   
  
"Feeling bad is a general term, Vicki Ann. Be more descriptive. How did you feel?"   
  
She looked at him, her eyes turning a dark blue, much like the ocean on a stormy night. "I  
felt as if you had ripped my heart out and stomped on it right in front of me."   
  
"That's better. What did you want to do about?"   
  
She was obviously very annoyed by his 'counseling' and this made her angrier. "I wanted  
to rip your throat out!" she screamed at him with a ferocity that rivaled a Klingon's.   
  
Riker, startled, leaned away from her in his chair. "Good," he said, swallowing. "Anything  
else? Anything toward Deanna?"   
  
"Yes. I blamed her. For not ending things with you long ago. For leaving everything  
hanging between you two. Neither of you ever officially ended it. Even when she was  
engaged to Worf. I was angry at her for not doing anything. For letting you believe that  
there was still a chance that the two of you might get back together."   
  
"Did you want to rip her throat out?"   
  
"No, as angry as I was, she's still my sister. So I started directing all my anger at you,  
until tonight in Ten-Forward."   
  
"But you were never mean or cold towards me until tonight in Ten-Forward."   
  
"I felt I had to maintain emotional control. That I had to hide my feelings. It made me sick  
to my stomach to act as if everything was fine, but I felt I had to do it. I mean how would  
you feel if you went to Deanna for counsel and she was obviously preoccupied with her  
own problems? I can't let my emotions get in the way when I'm practicing medicine or  
operating the conn! I could saw off somebody's arm or fly the ship into a black hole."   
  
"Well then, what about when you're off duty? Why couldn't you express and deal with your  
feelings then?"   
  
"When did I have time? I have friends here, I'm expected to spend time with them, with  
you. What do you think would happen if I showed up at poker on Tuesday and didn't speak  
to you and Deanna or snapped every time someone spoke to me?"   
  
"It probably wouldn't go over very well."   
  
"Exactly."   
  
"Okay. What about after when you went back to your quarters?"   
  
"I guess I got so used to bottling everything up that I never stopped. You know, old habits  
die hard."   
  
"True. Still feeling angry?"   
  
"Will you stop that?"   
  
"What?"   
  
"Counseling me!"   
  
"You sound angry."   
  
"That's because I am!"   
  
"So let it out!"   
  
"Sometimes I wish I'd never met you! Half of our relationship has been us fighting! Before it  
was because each of us thought we'd hurt the other moving too fast after the party.  
Then it was because you were being such a jerk because you were jealous of Q. Now it's  
because you were an absolute jackass and were absolutely oblivious to your own feelings!  
You've had these feelings for Deanna for fifteen years and you've been hiding them for  
fifteen years. You should have known better than to get into a relationship with her sister!  
I should have known better."   
  
"So you're not only mad at me, you're mad at yourself."   
  
"Yes, I was so stupid! I actually thought that someone could forget their Imzadi and worse  
yet, I thought that someone could love me."   
  
"What are you talking about?"   
  
"I should have known better. Why would a handsome, normal, respected officer like you  
love someone like me? The only men that fall for me are mentally unstable. I'm a  
psycho-magnet. Everyone who claims to love me, hurts me. Why did I think it would be  
any different with you?"   
  
"Why would you think that, Vicki Ann? For crying out loud, your were Valedictorian of your  
class at the Academy. You are a first class pilot and you're a senior officer on the flagship  
of the fleet. You helped to detain a psychotic Q. You got the President's Award for  
Distinguished Medicine. You're considerate and caring and almost everyone who's ever met  
you loves you, with the exception of a few psychopaths. Now, where is this low  
self-esteem coming from?"   
  
"I don't know, I'm not a psychologist! Ask Deanna!"   
  
"I'll bet I know."   
  
"Well, tell me oh, wise one."   
  
He ignored her sarcasm. "Remember when you told me that before you found out about  
the experiment that you were angry that your biological parents abandoned you?"   
  
"Yes, yes. You brought it up before. What's your point?"   
  
"You feel that your parents abandoned you because you weren't good enough. So you  
kept doing everything you could that you thought would please your adoptive parents so  
they wouldn't abandon you; working hard in school, trying to be the good daughter and  
stay engaged to Gerard even though he beat the shit out of you everyday, becoming a  
doctor, not getting angry or upset. How's that sound? Am I crazy or what?"   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "Well, you are crazy, but that beside the point. Seriously, did you ever  
consider being a ship's counselor? I really think Deanna has rubbed off on you." She  
sighed. "But you're right."   
  
"Now do you have all that anger out of your system or are you going to hit me again?"   
  
"Why are you afraid that I would hurt you?"   
  
Riker acted coy. "No, of course not."   
  
Vicki Ann stood up and adopted a fighting stance. "Come on, Commander, do you want to  
fight me?"   
  
Riker laughed and stood up. They circled each other and Riker grabbed Vicki Ann around  
the waist and lifted her up onto his shoulder.   
  
Laughing, Vicki Ann hit Riker's back and screamed, "Put me down!"   
  
Deanna came running in and started laughing when she saw them.   
  
Vicki Ann repeated, "Put me down!"   
  
Riker dropped her onto the bed.   
  
"Just wait. I'll get you when you're not expecting it," Vicki Ann told Riker. She looked at  
her sister. "Deanna, I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean any of it. I was  
angry and had absolutely no idea what I was saying."   
  
Deanna, smiling, came over and sat down beside Vicki Ann on the bed. "I know you're  
sorry. You're also going through a rough time. Jadzia was a very good friend of yours and  
therefore you're taking her death pretty hard and it's carrying over into everything else."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. She hugged Deanna.   
  
"I feel left out," Riker teased from the middle of the room.   
  
Deanna and Vicki Ann looked at each other. They got up, went over to Riker, kissed him on  
the cheek and gave him a hug.   
  
Riker laughed. "It's not everyday I get kissed by two beautiful women."   
  
"Oh, I thought that was part of your daily routine," Vicki Ann replied.   
  
Riker gave her a look.   
  
"Just kidding."   
  
Deanna slipped the bracelet Vicki Ann had given her into Riker's hand.   
  
Riker winked at Deanna and then placed the bracelet in Vicki Ann's hand. "Here, this is  
yours."   
  
"Are you sure it wasn't meant for Deanna?" Vicki Ann asked quietly.   
  
Riker shook his head. "Yes, I'm sure. It was meant for you, my friend."   
  
Vicki Ann hugged him. "Thanks. You don't know how much it means to have not lost every  
friend in the universe."   



	3. 3

Chapter 3   
  
Vicki Ann stepped into the shuttle. Once again, Starfleet had requested her presence at a  
medical conference. This time the conference was on Earth. She was leaving early so that  
she could stop at Deep Space Nine for a few days. She needed to talk to some people  
who had known Jadzia so that they could share memories and help ease their pain. It had  
been tough, going through each day, knowing that the universe was out of whack  
because Jadzia was gone. She'd talked to Deanna about it and Deanna had suggested  
leaving early so that Vicki Ann could visit Worf, Julian and everyone else that had known  
Jadzia. She waved to Riker and Deanna, who were seeing her off, and climbed in the  
shuttle.   
  
Vicki Ann walked past the science station on Deep Space Nine. She felt a twinge of  
sadness overcome her at the sight of Jadzia's old post. Instead of Jadzia, there was a  
someone else. Then she noticed a small woman with short brown hair walking by the  
station. Vicki Ann turned to go towards the infirmary when the woman said to her, "Hello,  
Vicki Ann."   
  
Vicki Ann turned around and stared at the woman. This must be Dax's new host. "Hi."   
  
"I know this must be hard for you, seeing me so soon after Jadzia's death."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I haven't quite come to terms with it yet. That's the reason why I'm  
here."   
  
Dax nodded. "Maybe we can talk some other time."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded slowly and repeated, "Some other time."   
  
"Vicki Ann!" Julian Bashir's voice called from across the room.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled and ran over to him. "Hello, Julian."   
  
He saw the tears that were forming in her eyes. He hugged her.   
  
"What was that for?" she asked as she pulled away.   
  
"You looked like you needed it."   
  
She smiled. "You were right."   
  
"How are you doing?"   
  
"Not very good."   
  
"Come on, let's go get a cup of coffee."   
  
Vicki Ann and Bashir sat at Quark's bar.   
  
"Has Worf improved any?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
Bashir nodded. "For a while his attention was focused on making sure that Jadzia got into  
Sto-Vo-Kor. He had to win a battle in her name. For him, the war with the Dominion was  
preferable. The attack on the shipyard was the battle."   
  
"Ouch. That's a lot to carry on your shoulders."   
  
"Well, Worf has broad shoulders."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "True."   
  
"I thought that you weren't stopping by until you went home next month."   
  
Vicki Ann rolled her eyes. "Starfleet requests my presence at another medical conference,  
this time on Earth. They probably want another speech. Ever since they reinstated me,  
they keep asking for favors, which they know I'll do because I'm so grateful that I got my  
job back."   
  
"I heard that your speech about Q caused quite a stir."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "You could say that. Starfleet Command didn't like me exposing the  
human side of Q. It's easier to hate something if you believe it has absolutely no good in  
it."   
  
Bashir nodded. "You know, Vicki Ann, we're talking about everything but what you came  
here to talk about."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I know." She glanced up and saw Dax talking to someone a few feet  
away. "It's hard seeing her so soon after Jadzia's death. At least you had some time to get  
used to her being gone before the new host showed up. I had absolutely no warning. I  
showed up and there she was. I guess that's what you get when you're friends with a Trill,  
huh? I haven't even accepted the fact that she's gone. It feels like a dream. I just keep  
thinking, 'It's not fair, it's not fair. How could this happen to someone so wonderful?"   
  
"I've always been taught that everything happens for a reason. Even the Q believe that.  
But why did this happen? What meaning did it have? Absolutely nothing, that's what.  
Another needless death. I know as a doctor, I should be used to dealing with death, but  
I'm not. I'm a horrible doctor, Julian. I let myself get close to my patients and then if  
something happens, I feel it as if they were a friend instead of a patient. It's nice because  
they trust me, but it's bad if I lose someone. I became a doctor because I wanted to  
protect life, therefore I have a very hard time dealing with death. Especially when it's  
something that's pointless. It's one thing if you die fighting for what you believe in and it's  
another when you're in the wrong place at the wrong time." She paused, catching a  
breath. "It's not fair. She and Worf would have been so happy. I know they would have  
been. Jadzia would have been a fantastic mother. It's not fair!" The tears were streaming  
down her face so fast now, she could hardly breathe.   
  
Julian stood up and put his hand on her shoulder. "Come on, Vicki Ann, let's go somewhere  
else."   
  
She nodded and stood up.   
  
Julian put his arm around her shoulder comfortingly, and the two of them walked away.   
  
And Ezri Dax watched them go.   
  
"There, you can cry all you want without worrying about people seeing you," Julian told  
Vicki Ann.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled a bit. They were sitting on the couch in Julian's quarters. "I'm sorry. It's  
like I said, I haven't even begun to deal with this yet. I can't deal with it because I can't  
accept it. I can't accept it because it's not right. I can't believe she was that  
unimportant. It's not fair because I 'm still here. An entire race fought to keep me alive.  
Why was I allowed to live and she wasn't? I can't be more important than her!"   
  
"You're not. Her death had some purpose, one we're not meant to know."   
  
"What purpose? To make Worf lose someone else he loves? To make Sisko question  
whether he belongs in Starfleet? To make me lose my mind?"   
  
"Maybe so we can win the war with the Dominion."   
  
"What does she have to do with the war?"   
  
"Worf winning a battle in her name."   
  
"I don't care about the war. I want her here not in Sto-Vo-Kor!"   
  
"Don't you think you're being a little selfish?"   
  
Vicki Ann glared at him and said, "I don't care."   
  
"What do you care about Vicki Ann? Obviously not your job because you know that  
Starfleet will risk one life to stop a war to save millions. Obviously you don't care about  
Jadzia because she would have wanted it this way. She would have wanted her death to  
mean something."   
  
Vicki Ann stared at him for a few minutes. She shook her head. "You're right. I was being  
selfish." She looked up at the ceiling. "Jadzia, wherever you are, I'm sorry."   
  
Julian smiled. "That's better." He moved over so that he was sitting beside her. "How are  
you feeling?"   
  
She smiled at him. "Better."   
  
He slid his arm around her and she put her head on his shoulder. The rest of the night they  
were quiet, staring at he stars and keeping silent vigil for their friend Jadzia Dax.   
  
The next morning, Vicki Ann walked into Quark's bar and ordered a Raktajino. Bashir was  
dragging behind her.   
  
"How do you do it, Vicki Ann? You hardly got any sleep and yet you're full of energy,"  
Bashir asked her.   
  
She smiled. "Mind over matter."   
  
Bashir looked at her. She had a look of contentment on her face. Not joy or happiness. Not  
sadness. Contentment. In between. She was starting to deal with Jadzia's death.   
  
Worf walked by. Vicki Ann saw him and ran over to him. She began to walk with him. "Hello  
Worf."   
  
"Hello, doctor," he replied.   
  
"Captain Picard says hello."   
  
"You may return the sentiment."   
  
Vicki Ann almost smiled. "Worf, I know you don't want to talk, but I just wanted to let you  
know that you're not alone in this. I have been out of control for the last week because I  
couldn't accept her death. I still can't accept it but at least I'm dealing with it now. She  
would have wanted it that way. She wouldn't have wanted us to dwell on it. I also know  
that she would have wanted her death to mean something. And I think that winning a  
battle against the Dominion for her was a fine way to do it. Not only did it get her into  
Sto- Vo-Kor, but it made her death mean something. Q'apla for Jadzia!"   
  
Vicki Ann thought she saw a hint of a smile on Worf's face. "Thank you, Doctor," he  
replied.   
  
"It's Vicki Ann, Worf."   
  
"Vicki Ann."   
  
"I know you're not one for talking, but if you ever need anything; a talk, a friendly face, or  
someone to drink bloodwine with, I'm here. Jadzia was quite impressed with how I, a  
non-Klingon, held my bloodwine."   
  
Worf looked at her, almost in awe. "I believe you were a Klingon in a past life, doctor."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "Thank you, Worf. That's quite a compliment. O'y dashek ga'hg!"   
  
"Batlh biHeghjaj," he replied. Then, he walked away.   
  
Smiling, as Vicki Ann walked to the bar, she whispered to herself, "Q'apla, Jadzia, Q'apla."  
The she sat down at the bar.   
  
"What did you say to him?" Julian asked.   
  
"Not much. I told him that I thought winning the battle for Jadzia was a good way to give  
her death meaning. And then I said, 'may you endure the pain' in Klingon."   
  
"What did he say to you?"   
  
"He said, 'may you die well.' He also said I must have been a Klingon in a past life."   
  
"That's quite a compliment coming from Worf," Julian replied, smiling.   
  
Ezri Dax walked by and Vicki Ann got up and walked over to her. "Hello."   
  
Ezri looked at her, smiling. "Hi, Vicki Ann."   
  
"Want to go for a walk?" Vicki Ann asked her.   
  
Ezri nodded. "Sure."   
  
"So, how did things go between you two?" Bashir asked Vicki Ann.   
  
She smiled. "Good. She's definitely not Jadzia, but I like her."   
  
"Are you going to keep in touch?" Bashir asked.   
  
"I think so," Vicki Ann replied, nodding.   
  
"When are you leaving?"   
  
"Tonight. The Adrian is leaving at 1700 hours for Earth."   
  
"I'll bet you're going to hate that conference," Bashir said, smiling.   
  
"Why?"   
  
"You don't seem like the type to sit in an auditorium all day, listening to speeches about  
how to treat radiation sickness. I think you'd prefer to be doing something, like sit at the  
helm of the flagship of the Federation or perform sugery."   
  
"You know me too well. Amazingly. I mean, we haven't known each other all that long and  
yet I fell like we've been friends for years."   
  
"I think that's because we were so close to Jadzia."   
  
"Maybe. Maybe not."   
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"   
  
"Nothing, it's just amazing how everything works out and how appropriately you make new  
friends. I mean, I lost Jadzia, but gained you and possibly Ezri."   
  
Bashir smiled to himself. "Yeah, I guess it is pretty amazing."   



	4. 4

  
Chapter 4   
  
Vicki Ann stepped on the Adrian. She turned and waved to Julian and then followed the  
ensign who had been assigned to show her to her quarters. They would be arriving at  
Earth in two days. She told herself that she would try to enjoy the conference. She had  
been ordered to by Captain Picard. He told her that she needed a break and she should  
have as much fun as possible so that he could have his pilot back. She'd laughed and said,  
"Yes, sir."   
  
Vicki Ann felt so much better since she'd talked to Julian and Ezri. She hoped Worf could  
work things out with Ezri. Vicki Ann followed the assigned ensign to her quarters for the  
next few days.   
  
As they walked into the small, but adequate quarters she had been provided with, the  
young ensign said, "Captain Davidson told me to tell you that we will arrive at Earth in  
approximately one week. Also, if you need anything, I have been assigned as your personal  
liaison and I will be happy to assist you in any way. All the facilities of the ship are at your  
disposal. The holodecks are located on Deck 12 and the gymnasium is on Deck 15. As you  
know, the computer can tell you where everything is."   
  
"Thank you very much, but I don't think I'll do much on this trip except eat, sleep, and  
relax. I'm in dire need of a vacation."   
  
"As you wish." The ensign turned and left.   
  
Vicki Ann let out a sigh of relief. Finally. She collapsed on the bed and immediately fell  
asleep.   
  
One month later, Vicki Ann stood on the transporter padd of the U.S.S. Allegheny. She  
watched the transporter chief activate the transporter and Vicki Ann felt herself shimmer  
and reappear on the Enterprise. Deanna and Riker stood in the transporter room, waiting  
for her. When she saw them, Vicki Ann's jaw dropped somewhere near the floor, for two  
reasons. They were holding hands and Riker's beard was gone. "What did you do?"   
  
"What?" Riker and Deanna echoed.   
  
Vicki Ann walked up to Riker and touched his face. She turned his head toward her and  
then away from her, studying his face as if it was painting. "Not bad. Just a little  
disconcerting."   
  
"And why is that?" he asked her.   
  
"Well, it's just a shock that's all. You look so much older."   
  
"I thought it made me look younger," he replied.   
  
"I agree," Deanna added, smiling wryly.   
  
Vicki Ann snickered.   
  
"Welcome back," Deanna said.   
  
"Did you miss me?" Vicki Ann teased.   
  
"Not one bit," Riker replied.   
  
Vicki Ann shot him a look.   
  
"Just kidding, Doc," he said.   
  
"There's someone here to see you," Deanna told Vicki Ann.   
  
"Who?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
Deanna and Riker parted. The doors of the room opened and Julian Bashir entered.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled and exclaimed, "Julian!" She ran over to him and gave him a hug. "What  
are you doing here?"   
  
Riker glanced at Deanna and raised his eyebrows.   
  
"I needed a ride back to the station from Earth and the Enterprise was in the  
neighborhood. How was the conference?" Bashir replied.   
  
Vicki Ann rolled her eyes. "A bore as always." She grabbed Bashir's arm and pulled him  
alongside her. "Come on, you still owe me that game of racquetball."   
  
Bashir shook his head. "No, no, no. From what I hear you're quite a player."   
  
Vicki Ann acted coy. "Says who?"   
  
"Ezri."   
  
"Oh, really. I'm not that good."   
  
"Guess what. I don't believe you."   
  
"Why not? Have I ever lied to you?"   
  
"Not yet."   
  
"See? What do you have to worry about?"   
  
"I've gotten to know you pretty well over the past few months and I think this is one thing  
you're lying about."   
  
"I'm appalled that you would say such a thing!"   
  
"Quit the dramatics, Vicki Ann."   
  
"Okay, okay. We'll wager on it. If I win, you have to go to the next medical conference for  
me. If you win. . . ."   
  
"You have to go to that holosuite program I've been telling you about. I managed to talk  
Quark into selling me a trial version of a one use only program."   
  
"Oh, no! Jadzia warned me about that!"   
  
"Come on, Vicki Ann, you got to choose what you get if you win...."   
  
"Oh, all right. Let's shake on it." She stuck out her hand and Bashir took it. They shook  
hands. "Okay, let's go."   
  
Riker shook his head and then said to Bashir, "Watch out, she's tough."   
  
Vicki Ann replied, "Watch out, Commander. I know where you live."   
  
As Vicki Ann and Bashir walked down the hall together, talking and laughing, Deanna and  
Riker glanced at each other. "Definite potential there, don't you think?" Deanna asked  
Riker.   
  
"Definitely."   
  
Vicki Ann slammed the racquetball over Julian's head. He made a face and she replied,  
smiling, "14-14. One more and I win."   
  
"Don't count your chickens before they've hatched."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed and served again. This time Julian returned it and she missed it. Damn.  
Looks like I might be going to the next conference after all.   
  
Julian stepped up and to the serving line. "Prepare to die, Vicki Ann."   
  
"Don't count your chickens before they've hatched."   
  
Bashir served. The ball flew over Vicki Ann's head. She jumped up to hit it with her racket,  
but the ball was to her side. She leaned over to hit it, but she lost her balance and fell.  
She tried to land on her feet, but instead, she landed awkwardly on her left foot. Vicki Ann  
cried out in pain as she heard a sharp CRACK!   
  
Bashir ran over to her. "Diagnosis?" he asked her.   
  
"Broken ankle," she replied. She handed him her scarf out of her hair, which he used to  
wrap around her ankle.   
  
"Can you walk?"   
  
"I'll try."   
  
He helped her up. She wrapped her arms around his waist and hobbled alongside him.   
  
"Ouch!"   
  
"I have a better idea." He lifted her up into his arms.   
  
"Ooh. Handsome and strong," she teased.   
  
"Shut up or I'll drop you."   
  
Bashir carried Vicki Ann into sickbay, receiving strange looks from everyone in the room.  
Vicki Ann replied to the attention with, "What, you've never seen a doctor with a broken  
ankle before?"   
  
Bashir set her down on a biobed. He grabbed a medical instrument and ran it along her  
ankle about a dozen times. ""Well, doctor? What day is good for you?"   
  
"For what?"   
  
"To go to the holodeck."   
  
"Oh, no! That's not fair. I was injured!"   
  
"But you missed. I won fair and square."   
  
"You did not!"   
  
"Face it, Vicki Ann, you lost!"   
  
She sighed. "Okay, okay."   
  
"How about tomorrow, at 19 hundred hours?"   
  
"Oh, all right. I suppose that's fine. I hope you're happy. Because of you, I have to attend  
another one those damn medical conferences."   
  
"Oh, I feel so bad for you."   
  
"Shut up," she replied, hitting him lightly on the arm. "You try sitting in an auditorium all  
day listening to a bunch of 'experts' give their theories on this and that, droning on and on  
in monotone voices. It's like the Borg. You will fall asleep. Resistence is futile. It's awful."   
  
"It can't be all that bad. There have to be a few good speakers."   
  
She smiled. "A few. But like you said, I'd rather be sitting at the helm."   
  
"Oh, it's the can't-sit-still-syndrome. Wait, let me check your eyes."   
He scrutinized her eyes. "Uh-oh. Just as I thought. They've got that wild look."   
  
Vicki Ann shook her finger at him. "I'm warning you Julian. I can be mean." She grabbed his  
shoulders and shook him gently. Their eyes met and they both started laughing.   
  
Deanna walked into sickbay and headed over to where Beverly was giving Riker his  
physical. She nudged them and pointed to Vicki Ann and Julian, who were too absorbed in  
each other to notice. "Aren't they cute?"   
  
Beverly nodded. "And they're both absolutely oblivious to the fact."   
  
"What happened to Vicki Ann?" Deanna asked.   
  
"They were playing rocketball and Vicki Ann landed wrong on her foot. She broke her  
ankle."   
  
"Who won?" Riker asked.   
  
"Bashir."   
  
Deanna smiled.   
  
The following day Bashir met Vicki Ann at her quarters at 1900 hours. He rang the chime  
and waited. A minute or two later, the doors opened, revealing Vicki Ann. He looked her up  
and down, memorizing every detail, and smiled approvingly. She wore a red dress with  
spaghetti straps and a full skirt that went to just below the knee. Her hair was loose and  
wild, cascading down her back. She wore two bracelets on her left wrist;   
one a chain with circular links, and the other a medium bangle with some words inscribed  
on it. Around her neck was a faux diamond necklace.   
  
"Well?" she asked, spinning around for him.   
  
"Are you sure you're Vicki Ann?" he teased.   
  
"Watch it, Julian," she replied. She looked him over. "Well, don't' you look handsome," she  
said, teasingly.   
  
"Thank you." He held out his arm for her. "Shall we go?"   
  
She took his arm and made a face. "If I have to."   
  
"A bet's a bet, Vicki Ann."   
  
"I know."   
  
"It's not that bad. I'm sure you'll love it."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded.   
  
Vicki Ann and Julian walked into the nightclub. Vicki Ann glanced around. "Not bad. It could  
be worse."   
  
Julian shook his head. "You're so stubborn."   
  
"Like mother, like daughter."   
  
Julian nodded knowingly. "Tell me about it."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed.   
  
A tall, grey-haired man walked up to them. "Hey, Julian, how's it going?" He saw Vicki Ann.  
"Who's your hot date?"   
  
Julian smiled. "Vic, this is Victorianna Troi. Vicki Ann, this is Vic Fontaine."   
  
Vicki Ann stuck her hand out and Vic shook it. "It's a pleasure."   
  
"No, my dear, the pleasure is mine."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled at Bashir. "Hey, Julian, I think I'm starting to like this program."   
  
Bashir laughed. "I told you so." He motioned to the dance floor. "Care to dance?"   
  
"How did you guess?" she replied.   
  
Bashir took Vicki Ann's hand and whisked her out onto the dance floor.   
  



	5. 5

Chapter 5   
  
An hour or so later, the doors to the holodeck opened and Riker, Troi, Crusher and Picard  
entered. They walked over to the table where Julian and Vicki Ann were sitting.   
"And then I said, 'Now that I know you liked it, I don't have to, do I?"   
Julian said.   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "That sounds like Jadzia."   
  
Julian looked down at the table. Vicki Ann thought that he almost looked nervous. "Vicki  
Ann, there's something I want to tell you."   
  
Vicki Ann heard someone come up behind them and looked up, obviously surprised to see  
her sister standing over her.   
  
The other two couples exchanged glances.   
  
"Mind if we join you?" Deanna asked.   
  
"Sure," Vicki Ann replied.   
  
Picard and Crusher sat down at the table while Deanna and Riker went out onto the dance  
floor.   
  
Vicki Ann turned back to Julian. "What were you going to say, Julian?"   
  
Julian shook his head. "Never mind. I'll tell you later."   
  
Vicki Ann glanced at Deanna and Will. The two of them were completely wrapped up in  
each other. Vicki Ann smiled and whispered to Julian, "I'll be right back." She got up and  
walked over to her sister. "May I cut in?" she asked.   
  
"Of course," Riker replied, stepping away.   
  
Vicki Ann hit Riker's arm. "You're a real comedian. I don't want to dance with Deanna, I  
want to dance with you."   
  
Deanna smiled. "Don't keep him too long." She started to dance with a holodeck character.  
  
As Deanna moved away, Vicki Ann turned to Riker. "So, how did you do it?"   
  
"What?"   
  
"Get Deanna back."   
  
Riker smiled. "I assume Captain Picard briefed you on the situation with the Bak'u."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded.   
  
"Well, the planet had us feeling at least ten years younger and it made us reconsider the  
choice we made fifteen years ago."   
  
"Oh. And?"   
  
"Victorianna Leonard Troi, I do not kiss and tell."   
  
"Right. And Klingons wear frilly underwear."   
  
"I never knew that."   
  
"Come on, Will!" Vicki Ann said.   
  
"No," Riker replied.   
  
"It doesn't matter if you tell me. Deanna will tell me anyway."   
  
"All right, all right. I'll tell you. It just went from there. I told her that permanent  
relationships held interesting rewards unknown to be before."   
  
"Oh, Will-the-Thrill-Riker is doesn't like playing the field anymore."   
  
Riker was shocked. "How did you-?"   
  
She grinned. "Deanna told me." Her face turned serious. "You know it's a lie."   
  
Riker, feeling uneasy, asked, "What is?"   
  
"That nickname. You're totally boring."   
  
Riker smiled. "Oh really. I never heard any complaints."   
  
"I didn't tell you because I didn't want to bruise your precious ego."   
  
"Really."   
  
She nodded.   
  
"Okay, if that's true, then I'm going to go warn Julian that you snore."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "Okay. I'm kidding. You're the best. Is that what you want to hear?"   
  
Riker nodded. "Much better."   
  
"Good," she replied. Then, a look of confusion crossed over her face.   
  
"What did you mean by warn Julian?"   
  
"Well, you two are awfully close and-."   
  
"Just friends."   
  
"Are you sure about that?"   
  
"Yes."   
  
"Are you sure Julian feels that way?"   
  
"Yeah," she replied hesitantly. "Why?"   
  
"Well, I'm just guessing, but by the way he looks at you, it seems like he feels a little  
more."   
  
"Really," she replied, considering the thought.   
  
"And while we're on the subject of looks, you're looking at him the same way."   
  
"I am not!"   
  
"Yes, you are. I've seen that look before. When we were together, you looked at me that  
way."   
  
"Oh, you're suddenly William T. Riker, expert on love."   
  
"Ha-ha. Seriously, I think that both of you definitely have feelings for each other."   
  
"And?"   
  
"And you both could use a friend now and quite possibly more. Besides, I really don't think  
Julian is going to abuse you, leave you for a higher existence or use you as a substitute.  
So go ahead. Live a little. Take a risk."   
  
"Me? Like I haven't? What do you call dating Q, an enemy of the Federation? What do you  
call dating my sister's Imzadi? What do you call that speech I made at the Alien Relations  
Symposium? If that speech wasn't a risk, I don't know what is."   
  
Riker grew serious. "I'm not joking, Vicki Ann. Don't miss this chance. Don't make the same  
mistake I did. Don't miss your chance with Julian."   
  
Vicki Ann saw the determination in Riker's eyes. "Okay. I'll try. But I'm not promising  
anything."   
  
"That's better." He spun her around. "Now, let show these cats how to dance."   
  
Beverly nudged Picard. "Look at Vicki Ann and Will." She pointed to the ex-couple who  
were living it up on the dance floor. "Did you know that Vicki Ann took dance lessons when  
she was little?"   
  
"It's no wonder she's so good," Picard replied.   
  
"I still can't believe he and Deanna got back together. Poor Vicki Ann,"   
Beverly commented.   
  
"It just wasn't meant to be," Picard replied.   
  
Julian looked surprised. "Vicki Ann and Commander Riker were. . . involved?"   
  
Beverly nodded. "Yes. They broke up just after her speech at the Alien Relations  
Symposium."   
  
Julian nodded and muttered, "Right before she came to DS9."   
  
Beverly thought about it. "Right," she said.   
  
"I wonder why she never mentioned it." Julian watched Vicki Ann and Riker. She was  
laughing at something Riker said and her eyes were twinkling like a million stars. She  
noticed Julian and her smile widened and she winked. Julian smiled back.   
  
"I'm going to give you back to Deanna," Vicki Ann told Riker. "Deanna!"   
she called.   
  
"You can have him back now." Once Deanna reached them, Vicki Ann said,   
  
"He was completely boring anyway."   
  
Deanna laughed.   
  
Vicki Ann left them and went back to the table. She sat down beside Julian. "Miss me?"  
she teased.   
  
"Can't live without you," Beverly replied.   
  
"I wasn't talking to you, Beverly," Vicki Ann said. She turned to Julian. "Well?"   
  
Julian smiled. "I think Dr. Crusher summed it up." She doesn't know how right she is.  
Julian thought to himself.   
  
Vicki Ann squeezed Julian's shoulders. "Oh, he's too sweet, isn't he?"   
  
Vicki Ann and Bashir sat in Ten-Forward. They had decided to come here after the night  
club for 'real drinks' instead of the holodeck ones. Nikki, the new bartender/waitress,  
brought them their drinks. Vicki Ann took a sip and said, "Wow. I guess it's been a while  
since I've had one of these because it seems awfully potent."   
  
Bashir smiled. "You're just a wimp."   
  
"Oh yeah?" Vicki Ann replied and then drank the entire glass in one swig.   
  
"I take that back."   
  
Vicki Ann put her hand to her head. "Whew. If I didn't know better, I'd say this wasn't  
synthehol."   
  
"But it is. That's what's wonderful about it."   
  
A few hours later, Guinan came to Ten-Forward. She went behind the counter. She  
glanced around and saw Vicki Ann with that doctor from Deep Space Nine. They both  
looked as if they were a little drunk. Nikki had just come back from giving them their refills.  
"Just out of curiosity, what did they order?"   
  
"Who?"   
  
"Vicki Ann and her doctor friend."   
  
"Two Rakalien Frosts."   
  
"And what did you use in them?"   
  
Nikki pointed to a bottle behind the counter. "That. The syntheholic Brandy."   
  
Guinan's eyes grew big. "Nikki, that's not synthehol, that's Saurian Brandy."   
  
Nikki went pale.   
  
Guinan shook her head. "I'd better go tell them." She walked over to the table where the  
two doctors were laughing hysterically over absolutely nothing. "Vicki Ann."   
  
Vicki Ann looked up. "Yes, Guinan?"   
  
"There was a mix up and Nikki gave you two Saurian Brandy instead of synthehol."   
  
Vicki Ann erupted into laughter. "No wonder it was so strong."   
  
"Perhaps I should get someone to help you two to your quarters," Guinan replied.   
  
"No, no. We'll be fine," Bashir said. He stood up. Barely. "Come on, Vicki Ann. Let's go."   
  
She followed him and the two of them walked unsteadily out the door. "Goodbye, Guinan,"  
Vicki Ann called after her, waving wildly.   
  
Guinan shook her head and returned to the bar.   
  
Bashir helped Vicki Ann into her quarters. Actually, they helped each other. Vicki Ann went  
over to the replicator. "I believe I owe you a cup of coffee, doctor," she said to Julian.  
"How do you want it?"   
  
"I don't," he replied, collapsing onto the couch.   
  
Vicki Ann collapsed beside him. "I never had so much fun in my life."   
  
"You've got to do that more often. Cut loose. Have some fun. Do crazy things you don't  
normally do."   
  
"I did. I don't usually get drunk."   
  
"You're not drunk."   
  
"Yes, I am and so are you."   
  
"No, I'm not."   
  
Vicki Ann held up two fingers. "How many fingers am I holding up?"   
  
Bashir squinted at her. "Five?"   
  
"No!" she replied laughing. "Twelve."   
  
Bashir thought about that. "How can you hold up twelve? You only have ten."   
  
"Oops. I miss-counted." Vicki Ann laid her head on Julian's shoulder. "That holodeck  
program wasn't so bad."   
  
"I told you so."   
  
"I really had fun." She looked at him. "I really like you, Julian."   
  
"I really like you too, Vicki Ann."   
  
Their eyes met and all self-control broke down. They gave into all the temptation and  
passion they felt. With the help of the Saurian Brandy, they became totally uninhibited.  
They kissed each other hungrily and never gave it another thought.   
  
Until the next morning.   
  



	6. 6

Chapter 6  
  
Vicki Ann woke up and moaned. She had the biggest headache in the history of the world. "What the-?" she whispered to herself. A tiny memory floated to surface. Guinan telling her that the new waitress had screwed up and given them Saurian Brandy. "Oh, no." She glanced at the floor and saw her dress thrown in a heap in the corner, along with a tuxedo. "Oh, no." She rolled over and came face to face with a sleeping Julian Bashir. Vicki Ann covered her face with the blanket. "Oops."  
  
  
Vicki Ann grabbed her robe and tiptoed into the living room. She sat down at her desk and turned on the viewer. "Dr. Troi to Dr. Crusher."  
  
Beverly appeared on the screen. "Good morning. Vicki Ann." She noticed Vicki Ann's pained expression. "What's wrong?"  
  
"There was a mix-up last night in Ten-Forward and Nikki gave us Saurian Brandy instead of synthehol. I don't remember much about last night, except the fact that I was really thirsty."  
  
Beverly grimaced. "Get some rest. Doctor's orders."  
  
Vicki Ann smiled slightly. "I was hoping you'd say that. Would you speak to the captain for me?"  
  
"Sure. Hope you feel better. Crusher out"  
  
"Not much chance of that happening." Vicki Ann went over to the couch and collapsed.  
  
  
Julian Bashir awoke from a very interesting dream. He and Vicki Ann had gone to Ten-Forward and gotten very drunk. They'd come back to her quarters and ended up in bed together. He didn't need a psychiatrist to tell him what that dream meant. He had feelings for Vicki Ann. He rolled over in his bed and tried to go back to sleep, but something didn't seem right. He opened his eyes again. He gasped. In the corner, rolled up into a ball, were his clothes from the night before and a familiar red dress. He looked at the night stand. On it was a picture of Vicki Ann and Deanna. A command uniform was draped over a chair, ready to be worn. "Oh, no," Bashir whispered, knowing that to speak in a normal tone would make his head pound even more. But where was Vicki Ann? He got up and put on his pants and walked into the other room. Vicki Ann was asleep on the couch in her robe. Her desktop viewer was opened. She had obviously called in sick. He grabbed a blanket off the bed and covered her with it. Then he went back into her bedroom and collapsed on the bed.  
  
  
Deanna and Riker walked down the corridor from Riker's quarters. They passed Vicki Ann's quarters. "Let's ask her to join us for breakfast," Deanna said.  
  
Riker nodded and rang the bell.  
  
  
Vicki Ann jerked awake. She'd fallen asleep on the couch. The doorbell was ringing. She'd better answer it before it woke up Julian. She bolted for the door and opened it. The doors opened revealing Deanna and Riker. "Hello," Vicki Ann said, smiling.  
  
"Good morning," Deanna said, stepping in. "We thought maybe you'd like to join us for breakfast before we go on duty."  
  
Vicki Ann glanced around nervously. "No, actually, I'm not feeling very well and Beverly ordered me to stay in bed."  
  
"What's the matter?" Riker asked.  
  
"Oh nothing. Just a headache," Vicki Ann replied.  
  
"Well, if it's nothing, then why did Beverly order you to stay in bed?"  
  
Vicki Ann shrugged and quickly glanced behind her. "I don't know. You know doctors."  
  
Deanna looked at her sister. "What are you so nervous about?"  
  
"Me? Nervous? I'm not nervous. What makes you think I'm nervous?" Vicki Ann replied.  
  
"Well, you keep looking around and I sense it from you," Deanna told her.  
  
Vicki Ann laughed nervously. "I think you are imagining things. If you don't mind, I'd really like to go to bed."  
  
Riker sat down on the couch. "We're not leaving until you agree to go to breakfast with us."  
  
"I really don't feel well. Maybe tomorrow. Now will you let me sleep?" Vicki Ann pleaded.  
  
Riker noticed a black tuxedo coat draped over the back of the couch. "What's this?"  
  
Vicki Ann looked even more nervous. "That's Julian's. He left it here last night."  
  
"He came here last night?" Riker asked.  
  
"After we went to Ten-Forward, he walked me home. Come on, I'm really tired."  
  
"And why is that?" Riker asked, grinning.  
  
"Because I don't feel well, okay?" she replied.  
  
"Up late with Julian?" Riker asked.  
  
Vicki Ann looked shocked. "I can't believe what you are insinuating."  
  
"I'm not insinuating anything. But, if you think that, maybe it's true," Riker replied.  
  
"Get out," Vicki Ann said, trying to push him off the couch. When he refused to move, Vicki Ann heaved heavy sigh and sat down on the couch and crossed her arms across her chest. "Okay, okay. I'll tell you. That new bartender messed up last night and gave us Saurian Brandy instead of synthehol. I don't remember much, but I do remember being very thirsty and I think I remember kissing Julian. The next thing I knew, it was morning, our clothes were in a heap on the floor and Julian was lying in bed next to me."  
  
"Well, if he was lying in bed next to you, I'll bet you did a lot more than kiss him," Riker replied, laughing.  
  
Vicki Ann hit him with a pillow. "It's not funny."  
  
Riker continued to laugh.  
  
Vicki Ann replied, "Well, unlike some people this doesn't happen to me everyday!"  
  
Riker was shocked. "There's no need for that."  
  
"Now you know how it feels," Vicki Ann replied.  
  
"I tried to warn you last night. And besides you know what they say, when the wine goes in, the truth comes out," Riker told her.  
  
"Thanks a lot. Now will you two go?"  
  
Deanna nodded. "Come on, Will."  
  
Riker couldn't resist another joke. "Okay. We'll leave you alone with Julian."  
  
Vicki Ann hit him on the arm. "Will you stop that? Now get out of here!"  
  
He obeyed and followed Deanna.  
  
As the doors hissed shut behind them, Vicki Ann leaned back against the couch and sighed. How did she, the sensible doctor, keep getting herself into these messes? She heard movement in the bedroom. Julian emerged, looking as ragged as she did. She smiled slightly. "Good morning."  
  
"What's good about it? I've got a headache the size of the Milky Way," Julian replied. He joined her on the couch.  
  
"Tell me about it," Vicki Ann replied.  
  
"So, how much do you remember about last night?"  
  
"Not much. I remember drinking a lot, I remember Guinan telling us about the Saurian Brandy, and I remember us kissing. The rest I figured out when I woke up this morning."  
  
"It thought it was all a dream. Ten-Forward, getting drunk, coming back here. . . . ." Julian replied, his voice trailing off at the end.  
  
"What should we do about what happened?" Vicki Ann asked.  
  
"I don't know. Maybe we should just let things take their course. You know what they say, when the wine goes in, the truth comes out."  
  
Vicki Ann held back a laugh. Then she grew serious. "What are you saying? That you have feelings for me and that's why you did what you did and not because you were drunk?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
Another memory found its way out of Vicki Ann's subconscious and into her mind. Julian pushing hair away from her face and kissing her neck. She remembered smiling and rolling over toward him and kissing him passionately. She remembered feeling happy. She smiled at Julian. "Maybe we should let things take their course and maybe we shouldn't." She leaned forward and kissed him the way she had the night before.  
  
Julian, surprised, pulled away from her and asked, "What are you doing?"  
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "Taking a risk." She kissed him and they fell back onto the couch. A few moments later, a navy blue robe was thrown into the corner, along with a pair of tuxedo trousers.  
  
  
Riker and Deanna walked onto the bridge. They sat down at their posts and Picard turned to Deanna and asked, "Where's Vicki Ann?"  
  
Deanna glanced at Riker. "Well, uh-she-uh. . . ." Deanna was interrupted by Picard's comm badge.  
  
"Crusher to Picard."  
  
Picard tapped his comm badge. "Yes, doctor?"  
  
"I just wanted to let you know that Vicki Ann isn't feeling very well. I ordered her to stay in bed for the day," Crusher replied.  
  
"Is she all right?" Picard asked worriedly.  
  
"She'll be fine as long as she gets some rest. Crusher out."  
  
Picard looked at Deanna. "She's sick. Why didn't you just say so?"  
  
"I don't know, sir."  
  
  
Vicki Ann tied the belt of her robe. She went over to the replicator. "Raktajino."  
  
"Make that two," a voice called from the bedroom as Vicki Ann carried the drink to the coffee table.  
  
"Are you hungry?" she asked.  
  
"Please don't mention food, Vicki Ann."  
  
Smiling, she replied, "Sorry."  
  
Julian emerged from the bedroom in the tuxedo shirt and pants from the night before, except he didn't tuck the shirt in. As Vicki Ann got Julian's drink, he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He kissed the side of her neck.  
  
Laughing, she scolded him. "You're going to make me drop it."  
  
"So?"  
  
"So I don't want to spill raktajino all over my robe."  
  
"Oh, poor baby."  
  
"Shut up, Julian."  
  
They walked over to the couch and sat down. Vicki Ann laid her head on Julian's shoulder. "What's going to happen when we take you back to the station?"  
  
"You could come with me. I could always use another doctor." He thought about that. "No, I couldn't do that to you. I couldn't take you away from the Enterprise, away from the helm."  
  
Vicki Ann looked up at him. "Oh, Julian, that's so sweet." She kissed him. "Well, we'll just have to try to arrange shore leave together. And if we can't then we can visit each other."  
  
Julian sighed. "Yeah, I guess that's the only thing we can do. But what if it doesn't work?"  
  
"There's an old Earth saying: We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. How about we do that?"  
  
"That sounds good. That coffee helping any?"  
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "Yeah, I'm starting to feel better. How about you?"  
  
Julian nodded. "Much better. What do you want to do today?"  
  
"Well, I'm supposed to be sick." She thought about it. "Nothing."  
  
"Nothing? What do you mean by nothing?"  
  
"I mean let's not plan anything. Let's just do what we feel like doing. If we want to sit here and do absolutely nothing, fine. I wouldn't mind just lying here with you, just enjoying being with one another." She smiled at him. "Not that we can't do other things."  
  
"That sounds good."  
  
"Which?"  
  
Julian grinned. "Both."  
  
  
Riker and Deanna sat in Ten-Forward eating lunch. "Wonder how Vicki Ann is feeling?" Deanna commented.  
  
"Probably spending 'quality' time with Julian," Riker replied.  
  
"You're rotten. For all we know, they might not even be speaking to each other."  
  
"I wouldn't count on it. Did you see the way they looked at each other last night? They looked like a couple of lovesick teenagers."  
  
"They did not. And besides, who was acting like a lovesick teenager a few weeks ago?"  
  
Riker shrugged. "Not willingly."  
  
"What are you saying? That if it had been up to you, you wouldn't have acted like that and therefore probably hindering out chances of getting back together?"  
  
Riker swallowed, knowing he had to choose his next words carefully. "No, not at all. I guess it wasn't that bad."  
  
"That's good. So, do you like Julian?"  
  
"I've met him before. He's . . . nice. It's just that this whole thing doesn't fit my impression of him."  
  
"Well, this whole thing isn't like Vicki Ann either. She doesn't jump into bed every time she meets a member of the opposite sex like someone we know."  
  
"Now, now. There's no need for that. What are they going to do when he goes back to the station? That is if they decide to pursue a relationship."  
  
Deanna shook her head. "Tough decision, isn't it? Sound familiar?"  
  
Riker nodded. "I know what you mean."  
  
"I hope things work between them. I hate seeing Vicki Ann get hurt."  
  
Riker nodded.  
  
Deanna continued. "They are so cute together and they really do love each other and-." she stopped. "What was that?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"That emotion I just sensed from you that you desperately pushed away."  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"Don't lie to me, Will." Deanna closed her eyes, reaching out for the emotion and tried to get in into her grasp. Once she had it, she opened her eyes. She looked at Riker, a look of disbelief on her face. " It was jealousy. You did love her, you liar. You let her convince you that you didn't so that the possibility of us getting back together was still open. You didn't want to commit to her because you were afraid of losing me."  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"Vicki Ann! You put her through all that pain just so that you could be safe."  
  
"Deanna, I didn't know. I didn't mean to-."  
  
"You have to tell her."  
  
"Why? All it will do is harm things with her and Julian."  
  
"She has to know."  
  
"No, she doesn't."  
  
"Yes, she does. Will, if you don't tell her, things are over for us. Forever."  
  
He could tell by the look in her eyes that she was serious. Hell hath no fury like a sister of a woman scorned, Riker thought to himself. "Alright."  
  
"Now go."  
  
"Now?"  
  
"Yes, now."  
  
"But what about lunch?"  
  
"Forget lunch. This is more important. Go."  
  
Riker saluted her. "Yes, sir." And he trudged off as if he were going to a firing squad because that is exactly what Vicki Ann was going to do to him. Kill him.  



	7. 7

Chapter 7  
  
Riker and Deanna walked onto the bridge. They sat down at their posts and Picard turned to Deanna and asked, "Where's Vicki Ann?"  
  
Deanna glanced at Riker. "Well, uh-she-uh. . . ." Deanna was interrupted by Picard's comm badge.  
  
"Crusher to Picard."  
  
Picard tapped his comm badge. "Yes, doctor?"  
  
"I just wanted to let you know that Vicki Ann isn't feeling very well. I ordered her to stay in bed for the day," Crusher replied.  
  
"Is she all right?" Picard asked worriedly.  
  
"She'll be fine as long as she gets some rest. Crusher out."  
  
Picard looked at Deanna. "She's sick. Why didn't you just say so?"  
  
"I don't know, sir."  
  
  
Vicki Ann tied the belt of her robe. She went over to the replicator. "Raktajino."  
  
"Make that two," a voice called from the bedroom as Vicki Ann carried the drink to the coffee table.  
  
"Are you hungry?" she asked.  
  
"Please don't mention food, Vicki Ann."  
  
Smiling, she replied, "Sorry."  
  
Julian emerged from the bedroom in the tuxedo shirt and pants from the night before, except he didn't tuck the shirt in. As Vicki Ann got Julian's drink, he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He kissed the side of her neck.  
  
Laughing, she scolded him. "You're going to make me drop it."  
  
"So?"  
  
"So I don't want to spill raktajino all over my robe."  
  
"Oh, poor baby."  
  
"Shut up, Julian."  
  
They walked over to the couch and sat down. Vicki Ann laid her head on Julian's shoulder. "What's going to happen when we take you back to the station?"  
  
"You could come with me. I could always use another doctor." He thought about that. "No, I couldn't do that to you. I couldn't take you away from the Enterprise, away from the helm."  
  
Vicki Ann looked up at him. "Oh, Julian, that's so sweet." She kissed him. "Well, we'll just have to try to arrange shore leave together. And if we can't then we can visit each other."  
  
Julian sighed. "Yeah, I guess that's the only thing we can do. But what if it doesn't work?"  
  
"There's an old Earth saying: We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. How about we do that?"  
  
"That sounds good. That coffee helping any?"  
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "Yeah, I'm starting to feel better. How about you?"  
  
Julian nodded. "Much better. What do you want to do today?"  
  
"Well, I'm supposed to be sick." She thought about it. "Nothing."  
  
"Nothing? What do you mean by nothing?"  
  
"I mean let's not plan anything. Let's just do what we feel like doing. If we want to sit here and do absolutely nothing, fine. I wouldn't mind just lying here with you, just enjoying being with one another." She smiled at him. "Not that we can't do other things."  
  
"That sounds good."  
  
"Which?"  
  
Julian grinned. "Both."  
  
  
Riker and Deanna sat in Ten-Forward eating lunch. "Wonder how Vicki Ann is feeling?" Deanna commented.  
  
"Probably spending 'quality' time with Julian," Riker replied.  
  
"You're rotten. For all we know, they might not even be speaking to each other."  
  
"I wouldn't count on it. Did you see the way they looked at each other last night? They looked like a couple of lovesick teenagers."  
  
"They did not. And besides, who was acting like a lovesick teenager a few weeks ago?"  
  
Riker shrugged. "Not willingly."  
  
"What are you saying? That if it had been up to you, you wouldn't have acted like that and therefore probably hindering out chances of getting back together?"  
  
Riker swallowed, knowing he had to choose his next words carefully. "No, not at all. I guess it wasn't that bad."  
  
"That's good. So, do you like Julian?"  
  
"I've met him before. He's . . . nice. It's just that this whole thing doesn't fit my impression of him."  
  
"Well, this whole thing isn't like Vicki Ann either. She doesn't jump into bed every time she meets a member of the opposite sex like someone we know."  
  
"Now, now. There's no need for that. What are they going to do when he goes back to the station? That is if they decide to pursue a relationship."  
  
Deanna shook her head. "Tough decision, isn't it? Sound familiar?"  
  
Riker nodded. "I know what you mean."  
  
"I hope things work between them. I hate seeing Vicki Ann get hurt."  
  
Riker nodded.  
  
Deanna continued. "They are so cute together and they really do love each other and-." she stopped. "What was that?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"That emotion I just sensed from you that you desperately pushed away."  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"Don't lie to me, Will." Deanna closed her eyes, reaching out for the emotion and tried to get in into her grasp. Once she had it, she opened her eyes. She looked at Riker, a look of disbelief on her face. " It was jealousy. You did love her, you liar. You let her convince you that you didn't so that the possibility of us getting back together was still open. You didn't want to commit to her because you were afraid of losing me."  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"Vicki Ann! You put her through all that pain just so that you could be safe."  
  
"Deanna, I didn't know. I didn't mean to-."  
  
"You have to tell her."  
  
"Why? All it will do is harm things with her and Julian."  
  
"She has to know."  
  
"No, she doesn't."  
  
"Yes, she does. Will, if you don't tell her, things are over for us. Forever."  
  
He could tell by the look in her eyes that she was serious. Hell hath no fury like a sister of a woman scorned, Riker thought to himself. "Alright."  
  
"Now go."  
  
"Now?"  
  
"Yes, now."  
  
"But what about lunch?"  
  
"Forget lunch. This is more important. Go."  
  
Riker saluted her. "Yes, sir." And he trudged off as if he were going to a firing squad because that is exactly what Vicki Ann was going to do to him. Kill him.  



	8. 8

Chapter 8  
  
Vicki Ann sat in her quarters, listening to some music and daydreaming. She was planning shore leave for her and Julian. He had shore leave in a few months, as did she. They could go to Risa and- She was interrupted from her reverie by the doorbell. "Computer, pause music," she said as she got up. She pressed the door button and the door opened, revealing Cmdr. Riker. "Well, to what do I owe this pleasure?" she asked, smiling.  
  
He was not as cheerful. "Where's Julian?"  
  
"Oh, he's discussing some kind of experiment with Beverly."  
  
"How are you feeling?"  
  
"Much better. But what about you? What's wrong?"  
  
Riker sighed and sat down on a chair adjacent to the couch. "Deanna and I discussed you and Julian at lunch."  
  
"And?"  
  
"She said that she hoped you two could work things out because she could tell that the two of you really did love each other."  
  
"And?"  
  
"Will you stop interrupting me?"  
  
"Well stop pausing so much!"  
  
"And she told me she sensed something strange from me, so she dug deeper and realized it was jealousy."  
  
"Jealousy? Of whom?" Vicki Ann asked, although her expression said that she already knew.  
  
"Julian."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Vicki Ann, this is going to be hard for you to hear after our talk about why I started seeing you, but I did love you."  
  
"What?" she whispered, too confused from what he had just thrown at her.  
  
"I did love you, but I was afraid to commit to anything because of my love for Deanna. If I would have committed to you, then I could have blown my chances with Deanna and I didn't want that to happen. So when you told me that you didn't think I loved you and that I saw you as Deanna, that provided me with a way out of our relationship, so I took it."  
  
"What?" she echoed.  
  
He got up off the chair and went over to comfort her. "Vicki Ann, I'm sorry. I didn't realize what I was-."  
  
It hit Vicki Ann like a ton of bricks. "You son of a bitch," she said rather calmly.  
  
Riker backed up.  
  
"How could you do that to me? You were my friend. You used me to get back your precious Deanna. You couldn't have loved me if you did that to me. I had a nervous breakdown. I fought with Deanna because of it. I hated her, my own sister for not letting go when it was you who couldn't let go. Deanna doesn't deserve you. Dammit, I defended you to Q in San Francisco before I 'realized' that you didn't love me! I defended you to Beverly, to myself and you didn't deserve any of it! I trusted you and you betrayed me."  
  
"Vicki Ann, I'm-."  
  
"Shut up! I don't want to hear it anymore. You are not sorry. It got you Deanna, didn't it? And that's all you care about. Get out! I don't want to see you except for on the bridge. I will support Deanna if she chooses to continue to see you and I will be civil, but don't expect any more than that. I no longer have a friend named William T. Riker."  
  
"Vicki Ann-."  
  
"Get out!"  
  
Riker obeyed.  
  
As for Vicki Ann, she went over to the window and stared at the stars.  
  
  
Julian Bashir got to Vicki Ann's quarters. The door was unlocked so he entered. The lights were dim and everything was silent. "Vicki Ann, are you here?"  
  
No answer.  
  
He walked in further and saw that she was standing in front of the window, staring at the stars. He went up behind her and put his hand on her shoulder. "Vicki Ann, are you okay? Why didn't you answer me?" She turned to him and he saw that her face was wet with tears.  
  
"Oh, Julian, everything is a mess."  
  
"What happened?" he asked, leading her over to the couch.  
  
"Will just came to see me. He said that he and Deanna had been discussing you and me and Deanna had sensed jealousy from him. She figured out that Will did indeed love me and that he let me convince him that he didn't so that he wouldn't be tied down so he could pursue a relationship with Deanna."  
  
"Do you love him?" Julian asked, stunned by what she had just told him.  
  
"No, of course not," Vicki Ann replied. Too quickly. "We're just friends now."  
  
"Then why does this matter?"  
  
"It doesn't."  
  
"Then why are you crying?"  
  
"I-I-don't know. . ."  
  
"Do you still love him?  
  
"No," Vicki Ann replied, hesitantly.  
  
"Do you still love him?"  
  
Vicki Ann, looking very nervous, remained silent.  
  
"Tell me the truth, Vicki Ann. Do you still love him?" Julian repeated, his voice raised.  
  
"Yes!"  
  
Julian looked as if his heart had shattered into a million pieces. He turned away from her.  
  
Vicki Ann went beside him. "Julian, of course I still care for him. We're friends. And he's with my sister and there's a good chance he could become my brother-in-law."  
  
"There's a difference between caring for someone and loving someone."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I asked you if you loved him and you said you cared for him."  
  
Vicki Ann seemed taken back. "I do love him, but in a different way."  
  
"If you do love him, then how can you love me?"  
  
"I told you it's in a different way. Will and I are just friends. I love you, Julian."  
  
"In what way? Are we just friends? Or am I a replacement for Commander Riker? Do you really love me, Vicki Ann, or are you just doing what you accused him of?"  
  
Hurt and confused by Julian's harsh words, Vicki Ann replied quietly, "No, of course not."  
  
"I don't know if I can believe you."  
  
"Believe me, Julian. I love you, not Will."  
  
"Then make a choice, it's him or me."  
  
"Julian!"  
  
"Him or me?"  
  
"You can't choose who I'm friends with!"  
  
"Make a decision, Vicki Ann!"  
  
"It's not a fair choice."  
  
"If you don't choose, it's over."  
  
"I won't let you control me!"  
  
"If you can't choose, then that means that you can't make a commitment to me. If you can't commit to me, then, I'm leaving," he replied, turning to leave.  
  
Vicki Ann grabbed onto his arm desperately. "Julian, no. Don't do this!"  
  
He freed his arm from her grasp. "Goodbye, Vicki Ann." He walked out the door.  
  
"Julian!" Vicki Ann called after him, but he continued to walk away from her and soon he was gone.  



	9. 9

Chapter 9   
  
Commander William T. Riker sat in his quarters going over Dr. Crusher and Vicki Ann's  
reports on the crew physicals. Beverly often mentioned Vicki Ann in her report, saying  
things such as, 'Dr. Troi and I feel' and 'Dr. Troi's results were.' Every time he read her  
name, he cringed. She was furious with him. He would be lucky if she ever forgave him.  
The worst part of it was if he and Deanna would make their relationship permanent, the  
animosity between him and Vicki An would no doubt cause problems between him and  
Deanna and Deanna and Vicki Ann. But, he had made his bed and now he had to lie in it.   
  
The doorbell rang. "Come in," Riker said, getting up from his desk.   
  
The doors opened and Julian Bashir entered.   
  
"Hello, Julian."   
  
Julian skipped the niceties and went straight for the throat. "What the hell did you think  
you were doing by telling Vicki Ann that you loved her?" he screamed at Riker.   
  
Riker was shocked by this usually soft-spoken man's outburst. Riker turned from Julian to  
collect his thoughts and then turned to face him again. "I had a feeling his would happen."  
  
"Then why did you do it?"   
  
"I didn't have a choice!"   
  
"No one was holding a phaser to your head!"   
  
"Oh, yeah? Deanna threatened to break up with me if I didn't."   
  
"She did?"   
  
"Yes."   
  
"Did it not occur to either of you that this would hurt her even more than finding out that  
you saw her as Deanna?"   
  
"Of course we did!"   
  
Julian shook his head. "I'm sorry, but this just doesn't make any sense to me. Why would  
you tell her something that isn't important now that would hurt her?"   
  
"Because Deanna felt that Vicki Ann had a right to know."   
  
"Even though it would hurt her?"   
  
"Even though it would hurt her," Riker replied.   
  
"Do you still love her?"   
  
"No, of course not." Riker thought about it. "Well, not in that way. We're just friends  
now."   
  
Julian scoffed at Riker's reply. "You know, that's what she said."   
  
"Really?"   
  
"Really. And I don't believe either of you."   
  
"Well, I'm sorry that you don't, but it's true."   
  
Julian sighed. "Put yourself in my place. If Deanna had just ended a torrid love affair and  
was still close friends with that person and they both said they didn't love each other  
anymore, would you believe them?"   
  
"To tell you the truth, I probably wouldn't. But, Julian, is there anything I can do to make  
you believe me?"   
  
"Not really."   
  
"Okay, Julian. My turn to ask a question. Do you realize how much you're hurting her? Even  
though I haven't seen her since our talk, I know how much she cares for you and I can  
imaging how much this is hurting her."   
  
"I don't know if I can believe that. If she still loves you, then why would she care about  
me breaking up with her?"   
  
"Dammit, Julian! She doesn't love me that way! For crying out loud, I am dating her sister!  
I could be her brother-in-law! I don't love her that way and she doesn't love me that way!  
She loves you!"   
  
"How do you know that she loves me?"   
  
"By the look in her eyes when she looks at you. I told her that the other night in the  
Holodeck. I told her that I could tell that she loved you because when she looked at you,  
she looked the same way she had when we were together.she's in love with you! I told her  
not to miss this chance or she would regret it for the rest of her life."   
  
"Like you did with Deanna?"   
  
"Yes."   
  
Julian shook his head. "I can't believe how stupid I've been. She must hate me right now.  
What do I do now?" he said, sitting down on a chair.   
"Flowers usually work good in situations like this. Specifically, red roses."   
  
Vicki Ann returned the volley from her holographic opponent. She wiped some sweat from  
her brow and then prepared for the next one. No matter how hard she tried though, she  
barely returned each one. She couldn't concentrate because her mind kept wondering to  
her fight with Julian. Her opponent returned the volley. Vicki Ann swung her arm to return  
it and she snapped her wrist too hard. "Ouch!" She had sprained her wrist. "Computer, end  
program." She supported her wrist with her other hand and began the walk to sickbay.   
  
Beverly Crusher looked up from her desk and saw Vicki Ann enter sickbay, cradling her right  
wrist.   
  
Vicki Ann nodded to Beverly and said, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it."   
  
Beverly got up anyway. "How did you do it this time?"   
  
"Playing racquetball. I swung too hard."   
  
"Julian getting too good for you?"   
  
Vicki Ann made a face. "I wasn't playing with Julian."   
  
Beverly nodded. "Oh, I see. Have a fight with Julian?"   
  
"Boy, is that an understatement. And I had an even worse on with Will."   
  
"What happened with Will?"   
  
"To make a long story short, he told me that when we were together, he did love me. He  
let me convince him that he didn't so he wouldn't be tied down so that he could pursue a  
relationship with Deanna."   
  
"Wow, what did you say?"   
  
"I called him names, insulted him, told him he was no longer my friend and that I didn't  
want to see him except on the bridge."   
  
"Whoa. What happened with Julian?"   
  
"He got jealous and told me that I still loved Will and therefore couldn't love him. And then  
he told me that I had to choose between him and Will. Even though I had already told Will  
that I didn't want to be friends with him, I told Julian that he couldn't control me by telling  
me who to be friends with. He said if I couldn't choose, I couldn't commit to him and so he  
left."   
  
"You're just lucky in love, aren't you?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "Yeah, and did you notice, I usually wind up getting injured?"   
  
Vicki Ann walked into her quarters. The viewer on her desk was up, indicating that she had  
a message. "Computer play message." Riker's face appeared on the screen. Vicki Ann  
crossed her arms across her chest and said, "This ought to be good."   
  
Riker smiled. "I know I'm probably the last person you want to hear from, but I thought I'd  
try anyway. I wanted to apologize, yet again. I know that nothing I can do can erase the  
pain I put you through. I understand completely if you still want absolutely nothing to do  
with me. I just wanted you to know that up until the other day, you were my best friend. I  
will have only the memories to keep me from losing my mind without you. Before you shut  
this off, one last time, this one's for you, Doc." He took out his trombone and began to  
play 'Come On and Smile, Doc.' When he finished, he said, "That's all. End of message."   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "Yeah, I still hate you. For making me forgive you."   
  
Commander Riker sat at the bar in Ten-Forward talking to Lieutenant Cann from  
Astrophysics. She had mentioned to someone that she played the saxophone and he'd  
asked her about it. They were talking about their favorite kinds of jazz when Riker looked  
up and saw Vicki Ann enter Ten-Forward, looking straight at him. He couldn't tell by her  
expression whether she was still mad or not. She motioned to a table. Riker turned to Lt.  
Cann and said, "Excuse me a moment." He went over to the table and sat down across  
from Vicki Ann.   
  
"How stupid do you think I am? Did you really think that message would make me forgive  
you? Well, it worked."   
  
Riker sighed. "I guess it was pretty stupid. Well, at least I tried." It hit him. "What did you  
say?"   
  
"It worked."   
  
"It did? That's wonderful. Deanna will be thrilled. Have you heard from Julian?"   
  
"No, and I don't know if I want to."   
  
"Why?"   
  
"He tried to control me Will. He tried to make me choose between you and him."   
  
"But you had already said that you didn't wan to be friends with me anymore."   
  
"I know. He didn't know that. Besides, it's the principle of the thing."   
  
"Oh. I'm sure he didn't mean it though. He was just reacting to what was thrown at him.  
As Deanna would say, his defense mechanisms kicked in. Just think about it Vicki Ann.  
That man really loves you."   
  
"I know he does, Will. That's what makes this so hard."   
  
Vicki Ann entered her quarters. She planned to go straight to bed. She was exhausted.  
She sat down on her bed and fell back. Her hand touched something sharp. "Computer,  
increase light level by 20%." The lights came up around her. She looked over and saw a  
dozen blood-red roses on her pillow. She picked up the card. It said, Vicki Ann,   
  
"I have a confession to make and hopefully it will explain why I reacted so strongly to the  
situation with Commander Riker. You've been an angel in my life since the day I met you.  
And from that day, I loved you. At first, you were a friend and I loved you as that. I  
valued your friendship tremendously and thanked God that you had been brought into my  
life. As time went on, I began to develop feelings for you. You were involved with someone  
at the time, so all I did was flirt with you in our correspondence. So, therefore, our  
evening in Ten Forward only brought out those feelings that I already had for you, but  
didn't realize I had. I guess it's a fault of mine, but when I fall in love, I fall hard, and  
therefore, I was hurt by what you said. I also spoke to Commander Riker and I understand  
your relationship with him. I am very sorry that I got jealous and I was wrong to tell you  
what to do. It's just that I love you so much and I was scared to death of losing you. I  
hope that you can forgive me and we can start over.   
Love,   
Julian"   
  
Tears began to stream down Vicki Ann's face. "Oh, Julian."   
  
The doors opened and he entered. "You called?"   
  
Vicki Ann sat up and looked at him. "You sneak."   
  
"It worked, didn't it?"   
  
She smiled. "Yes, it did."   
  
Julian kissed her tears away and then moved toward her mouth. They kissed each other as  
passionately as the night they'd had too much to drink. They fell back onto the bed.   
  
Vicki Ann pulled away quickly. "I have to put the flowers in water."   
  
"Later," Julian replied.   
  
"Later," Vicki Ann echoed.   
  
One week later, Vicki Ann stood in the transporter room, saying goodbye to Julian. "You're  
stopping by next month, on your way home, right?" Julian asked her.   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I've had to postpone the visit so many time that my mother, Alacia and  
Michael are ready to kill me. I'll shorten my visit to Betazed so that I can spend more time  
with you. As soon as I tell my mother why I'm shortening my visit, she'll send me on the  
next ship to DS9!"   
  
Julian laughed. "Just make sure you tell her that we are not getting married."   
  
"Oh, yeah? If I tell her that, she'll kidnap you, drug you, and force you to marry me!"   
  
"Tell her that my religion requires me to wait a least ten years of courtship before getting  
married."   
  
"What religion? Ten years!"   
  
Julian shrugged. "It will keep her from bothering us about it."   
  
"She won't believe that!"   
  
"Okay, five years then."   
  
"Julian!"   
  
"Okay, let's change the subject. At a speed of warp five, how long will it take you to  
reach DS9 from Betazed?"   
  
"Okay, let's see. . . . .I have no clue! Do I look like Data?"   
  
"No, you're much more attractive than Data."   
  
"Thank you. Now, are you going to kiss me goodbye, or are we going to stand here all day  
and make small talk?"   
  
Julian smiled. "I was waiting for you." He leaned forward and kissed her.   
  
"See you next month," Vicki Ann said as they parted. She quickly embraced Julian and  
whispered in his ear, "I'll miss you."   
  
Julian replied, "Me, too." He stepped up onto the platform.   
  
Vicki Ann nodded to the transporter chief and said, "Energize."   
  
Julian waved as he faded away.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled at the chief and walked out the door.   
  
A man watched Vicki Ann walk back to her quarters. He smiled to himself. You really are a  
clever devil, aren't you? It will only be a matter of time before Victorianna and her little  
friends are no longer a problem. He rubbed his hands together earnestly. Patience, Q.  
Don't get too anxious, or you might mess things up. Besides, there is the matter of your  
alternate. He must be taken care of first, otherwise, your plans for Victorianna are  
worthless. He could no longer stop the prophecy and he couldn't kill her, but he could  
definitely break her. Yes, indeed. Once you're finished with her, she'll shatter like a  
porcelain doll.   
  
A few weeks later, after everything was in place, a man with dark, wavy hair smiled and  
told his companion, "You will be beamed to Commander Troi's quarters where you will  
kidnap her and alert us when you have her. Then you will be beamed back here."   
  
The dark haired man's companion scratched his beard and then looked up at the other  
man. "You promise that she won't be harmed?"   
  
The other man smiled. "Of course I do, Tom."   
  
Tom nodded. "And what is your name again?"   
  
"Q. My name is Q."   



	10. 10

Chapter 10  
  
Tom appeared in Deanna's quarters. She was across the room, asleep in bed. He walked  
over to her and picked her up, being careful to keep his hand over her mouth. She  
screamed under his hand but he whispered, "Be quiet!" He said it in such a way that it  
obviously scared her, because she quit struggling. He tapped a small device on his wrist.  
"We're ready." They shimmered and disappeared.   
  
They reappeared in a small room. Q stood at the other end. "You may let her go," he told  
Tom.   
  
Tom obeyed and looked at Deanna and saw to his surprise that it was not Deanna.   
Whoever she was, she was looking at him with a look of horror on her face.   
  
"Will?" she whispered. Then, shaking her head, she added, "No, you're not Will. You have a  
beard." Her face changed to an expression of utter hate as she crossed her arms across  
her chest. "You must be Tom."   
  
Tom, beyond confused, turned to Q and asked, "What's going on here? This isn't Deanna!"   
  
Q smiled wryly. "I never said it was Deanna. I said it was Commander Troi. Thomas Riker,  
meet Victorianna Troi, Deanna's sister."   
  
Tom was stunned. "But Deanna doesn't-."   
  
Q interrupted him, "Her family didn't know she existed until a year ago. She was part of an  
experiment and was kept from her family to protect her. You don't need to know any more  
than that."   
  
Vicki Ann turned toward Q. "You again. Don't you ever quit?"   
  
Q stepped toward her and took her face in his hands. "Not when it comes to destroying  
what stands in my way."   
  
Vicki Ann stepped away from him and looked at Q defiantly and said, "Oh, am I standing in  
your way?"   
  
"Yes, my dear, you are. As long as you exist, the Alliance's plans are in danger."   
  
"And what 'plans' are you referring to?"   
  
"Taking over your universe."   
  
"Too bad."   
  
"And why is that?"   
  
"Cause we're going to give you one hell of a fight."   
  
"We'll see about that," Q replied. Then he left the room and locked the door.   
  
Vicki Ann stared at the door for a few minutes, trying to open the door. Q's face appeared  
in the window on the door. "Sorry, your powers won't work. I made sure of that. I wouldn't  
want you running off."   
  
Vicki Ann pounded on the door twice in anger. Then she sat down on the bench against  
the wall and put her head in her hands. "I probably can't even contact Q," she whispered.   
  
Tom watched her as she sat up and closed her eyes. She appeared to be concentrating.  
Her breathing slowed and she seemed to be perfectly still. He remember when Deanna had  
done the same thing on Betazed.   
  
Her control broke and she swore at their captor. "Damn you, Q!" She sighed. "You knew  
they'd come after me, so you severed the link." She stood up and began to pace like a  
caged animal. Quickly and abruptly, she turned to Tom. "What does he want with you?"   
  
Tom shrugged. "I have no idea."   
  
"He's probably keeping you here to make sure you don't tell anyone about me."   
  
"And what does he want with you?"   
  
"He wants me dead."   
  
"Why?"   
  
"Weren't you listening earlier? As long as I exist, the Alliance cannot go through with their  
plans."   
  
"What's the Alliance?"   
  
"The Alliance of the Q and Starfleet in Q's timeline."   
  
"Why are you such a big threat?"   
  
"Because I represent a mistake made by the Q. And a superior race cannot make mistakes.  
If anyone in the alternate universe found out, the Q would have to be made accountable  
for their actions."   
  
"Oh, I see. They're covering their tracks."   
  
Vicki Ann looked at him and nodded. "Exactly."   
  
"I assume that Deanna told you all about me."   
  
"Actually, Will told me. And I understand how you feel, being the one who missed out on  
everything, but that gave you no right to do what you did."   
  
"I assume you're talking about Deanna's kidnaping."   
  
"That, my mother's coma-."   
  
Tom interrupted her. "I didn't do that."   
  
"No, you didn't but your actions did. And let's not forget you stealing the Defiant and  
destroying a Cardassian outpost so that you could be a hero."   
  
"You heard about that too," Tom commented.   
  
She nodded.   
  
"You and Will must be awfully close for him to tell you all that. One Troi sister not  
enough?"   
  
Vicki Ann glared at him. "Bitter, are we?" she snapped.   
  
"So, tell me. Was he sleeping with both of you at once or did he break up with one of you  
before he moved onto the other?"   
  
"You've got a lot of nerve!"   
  
"I do? Sounds more like he does."   
  
"You don't know what you're talking about."   
  
"I don't? From your reaction, it looks like I do."   
  
"You're about ten times worse than him!"   
  
"I find that really hard to imagine."   
  
Vicki Ann put her hand to her head as if she had a headache. "I haven't been this angry  
since Will-." She stopped herself.   
  
"Since Will what? Since he told you that he was sleeping with your sister?"   
  
"Do you ever stop? No, genius, since he told me that he loved me." Vicki Ann realized what  
she had just said and added, "Why am I telling you this?"   
  
Tom seemed confused. "Someone tells you that they love you and you get angry? Are you  
insane?"   
  
"You don't know the whole story. He said he loved me after he broken up with me because  
he'd said he still loved Deanna. He said that he loved me, but had told me he hadn't so  
that he wouldn't be tied down in case the opportunity ever arose with Deanna. There, are  
you happy?"   
  
"Did you kill him?"   
  
"No, I forgave him."   
  
"You forgave him? Most people would have killed him."   
  
"That's what you wanted, isn't it? You wanted to hear that he got hurt, that somebody  
paid him back, that he missed out on something like you did. Gosh, Tom, it wasn't his fault.  
He didn't wish for it to happen. And what happened with Deanna was your own fault."   
  
"Are you a psychologist too?"   
  
"No, actually, I'm a doctor."   
  
"Really? I'm not surprised. You sound like one."   
  
"Well, you sound like a manipulative, vindictive, traitor!"   
  
Tom stood up and went over to her so that they were standing face to face. "Is that  
what you think I am?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "Yes."   
  
"Well, I sincerely hope you are mistaken."   
  
"Why is that?"   
  
"Because it means that I would sell you out in a minute to get out of here."   
  
"You already did, remember? You kidnaped me, thinking I was Deanna. Why would I trust  
somebody who did that?"   
  
"I guess not."   
  
Vicki Ann went back over to the bench and sat down again.   
  
"Do you really hate me that much?"   
  
"Yes, I do. Do I have to remind you of what you've done to the people I care about?"   
  
"No."   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "How do I keep getting myself into these messes?"   
  
There was a flash of light beside her and Q appeared. Her Q. "I don't know, Vicki Ann, but  
you usually have me to get you out of them."   
  
Vicki Ann hugged him. "How did you-?"   
  
Q smiled. "Jean-Luc told me. And I figured if I found my alternate, I'd find you."   
  
"Good idea. Can you get me out of here?"   
  
Q motioned to Tom. "What about him?"   
  
"You can leave him here." She considered that. "Better yet, why don't you send him back  
to Lazon II. No, that's too good for him. How about we get him assimilated?"   
  
Tom looked frightened by her remark.   
  
So did Q. "Calm down, Vicki Ann." He snapped his fingers. Nothing happened.   
  
"Q, we're still here," Vicki Ann commented.   
  
"Oops." He tried again. No luck. "Dammit! He got to me too."   
  
Vicki Ann's face fell. "Great!"   
  
The door opened and the alternate Q entered. "Did you really think I'd let you interfere?"   
  
"Well, I was hoping that your inferior intelligence would prevent you from considering  
that," Q replied.   
  
"Sorry about that, Q," his alternate said. "You're coming with me." He snapped his fingers  
and they both disappeared.   
  
"Arrgh!" Vicki Ann exclaimed.   
  
Tom was obviously confused. "Am I seeing double or what?"   
  
"Yes. The one that came to get me was from our universe and was the only way out?"   
  
"Why would he want to save you? You're not exactly the friendliest person I know."   
  
"Oh, and you're Mr. Congeniality!"   
  
"Oh, I get it, you're sleeping with him."   
  
"I was involved with Q for a short time, but now I am seeing someone else, thank you very  
much!"   
  
"Who?"   
  
"It's none of your business!"   
  
"Let's see, who's left on the Enterprise? La Forge? Data? No, wait! Captain Picard!"   
  
"Will you shut up?"   
  
"Did you break up with Q because of Will?"   
  
"What do you care? No, it wasn't because of Will," she snapped. "Now, Julian is another  
story," she muttered to herself.   
  
"Julian? Julian Bashir? Is that who you're seeing now?"   
  
"Yes. Why?"   
  
"No reason. I just find it hard to believe that someone like you would go for a wimp like  
him."   
  
"Julian is not a wimp!"   
  
"You're worse than Deanna when she's angry."   
  
"Thank you."   
  
The door opened and the alternate Q entered. He turned to Vicki Ann. "Your hero is now  
awaiting his torture."   
  
Vicki Ann seemed surprised. "Torture? I thought you just wanted to kill us."   
  
"I did, at first. But you and your Q defeated me and no one defeats me, my dear." He  
pulled her to him so that they were face to face. "Now it's personal."   
  
"I really don't think that your Kathy would appreciate you calling me dear, don't you  
agree?"   
  
Q ignored her. "We're going to play a little game."   
  
"What kind of game?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
"A game to see how much you can take. Both of you.'   
  
"Why me?" Tom asked.   
  
"Because what would be the point of testing her if I didn't have someone to compare her  
to?"   
  
"What about your twin?" Tom asked.   
  
Q shook his head. "No. His will be a different kind of torture."   
  
  



	11. 11

Chapter 10   
  
Tom suddenly felt as if he were claustrophobic. He couldn't breathe and the room seemed  
to closing in on him. Then, it turned into a bitter rage, boiling inside of him. He looked  
around the room. Q seemed to be laughing at him. He turned to Vicki Ann. She was  
laughing too. Suddenly, beside her was Will and Deanna. They laughed at Tom because he  
had nothing. Will had everything and Tom had nothing. He looked at Vicki Ann and thought  
to himself, I'll just have to take something of his.   
  
The alternate Q was standing outside of the room now, watching. His alternate sat in a  
chair near him, looking sick. "What's the matter, Q? I thought you liked games?"   
  
Q looked at his alternate with a look of horror. A blood- curdling scream came from the  
other room. Q stood up, ready to run into the room, but was pushed down by his  
alternate.   
  
"Sit down, Q. You're not going to go running to her rescue. I won't let you. You are going  
to sit here and listen."   
  
And Q did just that. He sat there, cringing the entire time as he listened to his friend's  
screams.   
  
Vicki Ann sat in the corner, her knees pulled up to her chest and her arms across her  
knees. She had a dazed look in her eyes and her face was wet with tears. Her hair, which  
had been pulled up into a ponytail, was now half hanging in her face. She had a deep cut  
on her right cheek. Her pajama top was torn off one shoulder and she had a large bruise  
on that shoulder.   
  
Tom lay in the opposite corner, unconscious from the emotional assault by the alternate  
Q.   
  
Q entered and so did his alternate. The alternate Q shoved Q into the room and shut the  
door. Q ran over to Vicki Ann. "Vicki Ann! Are you all right?"   
  
She continued to stare.   
  
"Can you hear me?"   
  
She didn't answer.   
  
Q thought for a moment. He snapped his fingers and a med kit appeared. "Well, I can  
transport in, but not out." He snapped his fingers and Beverly Crusher appeared.   
  
"What the-?" She saw Q. "Take me back to the Enterprise."   
  
Q shrugged. "Sorry, I can't do that."   
  
"Why did you bring me here?" she asked.   
  
Q sighed. "Because there is someone here who needs your help." He pointed to Vicki Ann.   
  
Beverly gasped. "What happened?"   
  
Q shook his head. "I'm not sure."   
  
Beverly scanned her. "By the looks of her injuries, it looks like she's been raped."   
  
Q gasped.   
  
"What have you done, Q?"   
  
"I didn't do anything." He pointed to Tom. "It was him. My alternate made him do it. I was  
in the other room and all I could hear was her screaming."   
  
Beverly fixed the cut on Vicki Ann's forehead and the bruise on her shoulder. "That's all I  
can do for now. We'll have to wait until we get back to the Enterprise. If we ever get  
back. Can you really not get us back?"   
  
Q shook his head. "I can bring things in, but not out. Wait." Q closed his eyes and tried to  
contact the Q, but was unsuccessful. "Sorry. Thank goodness I told someone where I  
was."   
  
"Who exactly?"   
  
"My brother. He should be realizing that I'm gone any time now."   
  
"But what good will that do?"   
  
"He might be able to figure out a way to get us out of here."   
  
"I severely hope so, because Vicki Ann needs a psychologist, preferably Deanna, and she  
needs her as soon as possible."   
  
"Sickbay to bridge."   
  
Picard glanced at Riker and then tapped his comm badge. "Yes?"   
  
"Dr. Crusher and a med kit have just vanished, sir."   
  
"By a transporter beam?"   
  
"No, more like when Q appears and disappears."   
  
Picard sighed. "What does he want with her?" he muttered. "Thank you for alerting us."   
  
"You're welcome, captain. Sickbay out."   
  
Deanna, who was sitting in her usual seat, suddenly gasped.   
  
Picard and Riker immediately turned to her. "What's wrong?" the captain asked.   
  
"Vicki Ann. Something is seriously wrong with her."   
  
Picard tapped his comm badge. "Picard to Dr. Troi."   
  
No answer.   
  
He tried again. Still no answer. "Computer, locate Dr. Troi."   
  
"Dr. Troi is not aboard the Enterprise."   
  
"When did she leave?"   
  
"200 hours."   
  
"We're going to have to figure out a way for the computer to alert us when someone  
leaves unexpectedly," Picard said to Riker.   
  
"What does Q want with Dr. Crusher and Vicki Ann?" Riker asked.   
  
"Vicki Ann is hurt. So I would assume that Q sent for Dr. Crusher to help her." Deanna  
suggested.   
  
"Hurt in what way?" Riker asked worriedly.   
  
"Severe emotional trauma. She has withdrawn inward to protect herself. We have to get  
her back, captain, or we may never see our Vicki Ann again."   
  
"But we have to find her first."   
  
"I can help you with that."   
  
Picard looked up to see who had spoken and saw a blonde hair man in a Starfleet uniform.  
Q's brother. "Q2, does your brother have something to do with this?   
  
"In a manner of speaking, yes. My brother's alternate had kidnaped both him and Vicki Ann  
to punish them for defeating him. He had already begun to torture Vicki Ann and that is  
why she has withdrawn. That is why my brother called for Dr. Crusher," Q2 replied.   
  
"What happened?" Riker asked.   
  
Q2 cringed. "Apparently, the alternate Q was unable to get Vicki Ann himself, so he  
enlisted the help of your duplicate, Riker, knowing that the computer would sense him as  
you. After Q arrived to try to rescue Vicki Ann, the alternate Q somehow emotionally  
attacked your duplicate and amplified his feelings of anger and hatred of you. He then  
forced Tom to direct his feelings toward Vicki Ann. This was to be a test of how much he  
could take. I regret to say that as a result of the emotional assault, your duplicate  
sexually assaulted Vicki Ann."   
  
Riker felt nauseous. He put his head in his hands. "Can you get her out?"   
  
"Yes, but we need to find a way to destroy the alternate Q's access to this universe," Q2  
replied.   
  
"Could you destroy it if you enlisted the help of the entire Continuum?"   
  
"Possibly. But we would need the Enterprise to go along to seal the fissure. The Q would  
be too exhausted from defeating the alternate Q to close it."   
  
"Captain, we may be able to seal it much the way we did when you shifted through time,"  
Data said.   
  
Picard nodded. "Yes, by creating a static warp shell."   
  
Q2 nodded. "Let's go." He snapped his fingers and the Enterprise zipped forward at about  
a million times warp point nine.   
  
When the Enterprise arrived at the fissure, Lt. Stirland who was at security said to Picard,  
"Captain, there is a ship bearing 330 mark 15."   
  
"Q's ship from the alternate universe," Q2 replied. He turned to Picard. "I'm going to  
contact the Q. I will alert you when the alternate Q has been sent back and you can seal  
the fissure."   
  
Picard nodded.   
  
Q2 closed his eyes. He began to glow with the brilliance of a million suns and the bridge  
crew had to cover their eyes.   
  
Suddenly, the bridge shook violently as if there was an earthquake. Picard ordered  
everyone to hold on, although it was doubtful that he was heard over the roar of the  
fissure. The bridge crew stared in awe, playing to their deity that they would survive.   
  
Now! Picard heard in his head.   
  
Data took the ship in and initiated the static warp shell. The bridge shook even more  
violently and a few officers were thrown from their stations. There was a brilliant and  
blinding flash and all went white.   
  
When the bridge crew regained consciousness, Picard immediately turned to Q2, who sat  
down in Riker's seat after he had been thrown from his seat.   
  
"Congratulations, captain. You did it. Your CMO and pilot are now in sickbay," Q2 told  
Picard. He smiled. "Maybe Q was right about you after all." He bowed to Picard. "I bid you  
and your crew farewell and I hope we never have to face this threat again."   
  
Picard nodded. "I agree. Thank you."   
  
Q2 saluted Picard and vanished.   
  
Vicki Ann was now in sickbay and Tom was in the brig. Riker, half on order from Picard and  
half out of worry for Vicki Ann, went to sickbay. He entered sickbay and he saw her, lying  
motionless on a biobed. Beverly was tending to her injuries and collecting evidence in case  
of prosecution. Beverly had just turned around to get something when Vicki Ann awoke  
screaming. Riker's heart ached when he saw the look of terror in her eyes. This strong  
woman who had stood up to her abusive ex-fianc‚, defeated Quinn and gave Q a run for  
his money looked like a small, lost child. Riker watched as Beverly comforted her. Vicki Ann  
noticed him and she slowly brought her eyes to meet his. He expected her to be afraid of  
him, but her eyes called for his help. He walked over to her and sat down beside her.   
  
"What can I do for you, Will?" Beverly asked him.   
  
"The captain wants you to check me out. I was thrown from my station while we were  
trying to close the fissure," Riker replied.   
  
Beverly nodded. "Come over here and we'll get started," she said, motioning to a biobed  
beside her.   
  
Riker glanced at Beverly, and then a Vicki Ann and then back to Beverly.   
  
Beverly took the hint and said, "Okay, we can do it right here."   
  
Vicki Ann linked her arm through Riker's and laid her head on his shoulder.   
  
Riker slowly got up from the chair he was sitting in and very carefully slipped his hand out  
from under Vicki Ann's. He held his breath, hoping she wouldn't wake up. She didn't. Riker,  
his legs stiff from sitting by Vicki Ann's biobed, decided to walked around sickbay. When he  
reached a wall, he stopped and leaned against it. Rubbing his temples, he heaved a heavy  
sigh.   
  
Beverly walked up to him. She frowned when he looked up at her. His eyes were bloodshot  
and he had dark circles under his eyes. He was obviously depriving himself of sleep for  
Vicki Ann's sake. Not to mention the emotional toll of the situation. Riker hated to see  
anyone in pain, but that concern was amplified a million times when it was someone close  
to him. And Vicki Ann was doubly close to him, not only was she a friend, but also because  
she was also the sister of his most likely future wife. Beverly put her hand on Riker's  
shoulder and smiled a him. "I think you need some sleep, Commander."   
  
Riker smiled slightly. "Thanks for the advice, doctor, but I can't. Not while she needs me."   
  
"But, Will, she's sleeping."   
  
"Exactly. That's when she needs me the most."   
  
"Why is that?"   
  
"Because that's we he came for her. While she was sleeping and couldn't be careful."   
  
Beverly sighed. "How long are you planning to be her bodyguard?"   
  
"Until Tom is in prison."   
  
"So you aren't going to sleep until we reach Starbase and they take him into custody."   
  
"Exactly."   
  
"Good luck. I'll bet you don't last a week."   
  
"Is that supposed to be a joke?"   
  
"No, it's medical fact." Beverly thought for a moment. "How about this? You can sleep in  
the biobed next to her and if she needs you, you'll be right there."   
  
Riker considered the suggestion. "Okay. Promise me you'll wake me up if she has a  
nightmare or calls for me or anything like that."   
  
Beverly nodded. "I promise."   
  
"Thanks." Riker sighed again and then asked Beverly, "Do you think he'll be found guilty?"   
  
"Well, the only witness is a known trickster, the accused is the genetic duplicate of the  
victim's former lover. That makes a pretty tough case. Hopefully, they can get a  
confession out of him."   
  
Riker nodded. "Hopefully." He shook his head. "It's hard to believe that a year and a half  
ago, I was hoping that Tom and I could get along. Now, I'd like to kill him. Slowly."   
  
Beverly nodded.   
  
"Do you know how hard it is knowing that it was me in some sense that did this to her?"   
  
"Will, Tom is not you. You two are completely different people now."   
  
"I know, but it makes me wonder if I could do the same thing if pushed too far."   
  
"You could never do that."   
  
"Are you sure about that? What about if I lost Deanna and my job and my identity? Can  
any of us really be sure what we'd do if we lost everything?" 


	12. 12

Chapter 12  
  
Vicki Ann dreamt of the attack that night. At first, she remained silent, but eventually the  
pain became too mich for her, so she cried out.   
  
Beverly heard Vicki Ann and ran over to awake Riker, but he was already up and  
comforting her. She was asleep and had obviously been dreaming.   
  
Riker shook Vicki Ann gently and said, "Wake up, Vicki Ann." She did. Her face was wet  
with tears. He pushed some hair away from her face and whispered, "Sshh. It's all right.  
You're safe now. No one's going to hurt you."   
  
She awoke and sat up, screaming. She saw Riker and scrutinized him as if she wasn't sure  
it was him. She touched his face and when felt nothing but skin on his cheek, she heaved  
a sigh of relief. Crying, she hugged him. "My eyes are starting to deceive me. I thought  
you were him."   
  
"Don't worry. He's still in the brig and I seriously doubt if anyone on this ship will let him  
out soon."   
  
Vicki Ann pulled away and smiled slightly. "Thanks for staying with me."   
  
Riker shrugged. "It's no trouble. Besides, if I didn't, Deanna would tell me to."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "If mother didn't tell you first."   
  
Riker nodded. "True." Riker was glad the she was able to laugh. It probably wouldn't last  
very long, but at if she was able to forget what had happened to her for one moment,  
that was enough for him.   
  
Tom paced in the brig. He didn't belong here. He had been possessed by a sadistic, alien  
entity and been forced to take part in Q's twisted idea of revenge. Rather than kill Vicki  
Ann, Q would make sure she was emotionally tortured for life. Tom bet that he would end  
up in a Cardassian prison again. Starfleet would work out a deal for him to complete his  
sentence plus the time ordered by Starfleet. The Cardassian prison would agree to keep  
him longer than the original time as a favor to Starfleet for returning their fugitive.   
  
Although, he bet that being in a Cardassian prison again would be no worse than being in  
the brig or in the Starbase prison he would be going to very soon. Everyone hated him.  
Everyone. The armed guards assigned to watch him looked at him with contempt and  
disgust. He could say one thing for Victorianna, she had lots of friends. The captain had  
come to tell him personally about the admiral ordering Picard to take Tom directly to the  
nearest Starbase. Picard had also told Tom what he thought of him and that he would do  
everything in his power to make sure that Tom paid for what he had done to Picard's  
helmsman.   
  
Tom was surprised that Will hadn't come to see him yet, or Deanna. He figured that they  
both wanted to kill him, but neither had come. Too bad, he thought to himself. He rather  
liked toying with them. The doors of the room opened and Tom had to eat his words, or  
thoughts, rather. His duplicate entered. Or rather the original, if you talked to Will. He  
would tell you that Tom was his duplicate. No matter though, he was here.   
  
Commander Riker walked up to the forcefield and turned to the guard. "Let me in."   
  
The guard released the forcefield for a moment while Riker stepped in. As soon as Riker  
was in the brig, the guard reactivated the forcefield.   
  
"Enjoying your imprisonment?" Riker asked.   
  
"I've never had more fun in my life," Tom replied. He stood up. "So, tell me why you're  
here. I know you're not here for small talk."   
  
Riker replied, "No, I'm not. I just wondered if you felt any remorse for what you did."   
  
"Why should I? It wasn't under my control."   
  
"Maybe it wasn't, but you could have fought him. But you didn't and I'll bet I know why.  
You enjoyed it. You saw it as revenge against me and Deanna and you enjoyed that."   
  
He had given Tom the perfect setup. "And what if I did?"   
  
Riker gave Tom a look of absolute hate. "You sick bastard."   
  
Tom laughed. "I'm sick? Whose the one who slept with his Imzadi's sister? Deanna wasn't  
enough for you, so you went after her sister. Who's the sick bastard now?"   
  
"What do you know about it?"   
  
"I only know what she told me."   
  
"She told you?"   
  
"She didn't realize what she was saying until it was too late. I got her angry and she  
rambled. She told me about how you said you loved her, but had let her believe that you  
didn't so that you could be with Deanna. Following in my deceptive footsteps, are we?"   
  
"You have no idea what you're talking about. You know absolutely nothing about me and  
you know even less about her!"   
  
"I don't know about that. I seem to know her pretty well, both socially and physically. She  
told me just about her whole life story. And as for the physical aspect, I know that she  
has birthmark on her left shoulder and-."   
  
Riker punched Tom.   
  
Tom flew back, but managed to keep himself from falling. He swung at Riker, but Riker  
blocked.   
  
Riker grabbed Tom by the front of his shirt. "You're lucky I don't kill you. I'd really like to  
and so would just about everyone on this ship. Although, if you talk to Deanna or Vicki  
Ann's friends death is too good for you. Beverly would have you drawn and quartered. I  
would kill you, but I really don't feel like another court-marshal. Although, I think it would  
save everyone a lot of hassle if I did." Riker brought his hands up to Tom's throat.   
  
Tom looked at Will and for a moment, he thought that will really was going to kill him. Tom  
didn't care, though, death would be better than going to prison.   
  
Riker pulled his hands away. "I may regret this someday, but Deanna's right. Death is too  
good for you. I'll tell you one thing, though. I will not rest until you pay for what you did."   
  
"Mad that I moved in on your territory?"   
  
"Get this straight. Things are over between me and Vicki Ann. I'm back together with  
Deanna, but Vicki Ann and I are friends. Best friends. And you mess with her, you mess  
with me. Anyone who hurts her has to answer to me. Is that clear?"   
  
"Crystal."   
  
"I'll give you a warning, too. Maybe it will keep you up at night. Vicki Ann has very  
powerful friends. An entire race of omnipotent beings fought to keep her alive and a few of  
those beings are close to her. Very close. And they will do anything to protect her and I'm  
sure they won't be happy when they find out what you did. As a matter of fact, I would  
pray that they don't, because I think that Q would be happy to use you in one of his  
experiments."   
  
"Q, the ex-lover. I've met him."   
  
"Well, then you know that he cares for her. And I know for a fact that he will punish  
anyone who hurts her. So if I were you, I would pray for death to come while you're at the  
Cardassian prison camp you'll most likely be sent to."   
  
"I would rather put up with that torture, if it will keep you up at night, knowing that I'm  
out there and could return at any moment."   
  
Riker shook his head. "You're not worth it. I once thought you were, but not anymore.  
Except for your physical appearance, you no longer resemble the William T. Riker I know at  
all." He walked away, stepping through the doorway as the guard took the hint and  
released the forcefield for him. Riker turned toward Tom again. "You're not worth  
anything."   
  
Beverly and Vicki Ann sat in Beverly's office, having a cup of tea. Vicki Ann had allowed  
Riker to leave when Beverly had agreed to stay with Vicki Ann. "The admiral has changed  
the trial to Deep Space Nine, since most of the senior staff there has been called to  
testify. I'm sure it will be nice to see Julian again."   
  
"Beverly, how am I going to tell Julian?"   
  
"I'm sure he already knows Vicki Ann."   
  
"But what if he blames me?"   
  
Beverly went over to Vicki Ann and put her arm around Vicki Ann. "Vicki Ann, he won't  
blame you. It wasn't your fault. And besides, Julian loves you Vicki Ann . He knows that  
you wouldn't do something like that to him."   
  
"I should have been able to fight him off. I'm supposed to be strong."   
  
"Not when an omnipotent being is controlling him. And you are strong. And that means  
that you will get through this. And your friends and especially Julian, are going to help  
you."   
  
Doctor Julian Bashir was sitting at his desk, going over the results of the crew physicals.  
He heard someone enter, so he looked up and saw Ezri Dax. He smiled at her and said, "To  
what do I owe this pleasure?"   
  
She smiled back, but her smile slowly faded. "The captain would like to see us in his  
office."   
  
"About what?"   
  
"I'm not sure, but he sounded serious. We'd better go."   
  
Julian put down his PADD and stood up. "Alright. Let's get this over with."   
  
The two of them walked in silence, both trying come up with a reason for this meeting  
with the captain. The entered and saw Sisko sitting at his desk, reading a report on his  
desktop viewer. He looked up at the two of them and smiled slightly. "Sit down."   
  
Julian and Ezri obeyed.   
  
Sisko sighed and looked down at his desk for a moment. "Sometimes as a captain, you find  
yourself having to people that you respect and care about that something has happened  
that cannot be undone. That difficult times are ahead. Times that will test their strength  
and the love of their family and friends."   
  
Julian couldn't help but think to himself, Oh my God, someone's dead.   
  
Sisko continued, "In a few days, the Enterprise will be arriving with the fugitive Thomas  
Riker. In two weeks, Admiral Blackwell with be arriving and will conduct the trial of Thomas  
Riker for the kidnaping of Deanna Troi and Alexander Roshenko, the attempted  
assassination of Gowron, and most recently, the kidnapping and sexual assault of  
Victorianna Troi."   
  
That was all Julian heard. Sisko continued to talk, something about the senior officers  
being called to testify and that was why the trial was being held here, but Julian didn't  
hear and more. All he could think about was Vicki Ann. What she must be going through  
and what in the world could he do to help her. He felt someone touch his shoulder. Julian  
turned.   
  
It was Ezri. She was looking at him with a look of concern on her face and asking him  
something. "What?" Julian muttered.   
  
Ezri glanced at Sisko and then back to Julian. "I asked if you were all right."   
  
Julian shook his head as if he were trying to shake himself out of a trance. "I'm fine. Just a  
little shocked, that's all." He turned to Sisko. "How did it happen?"   
  
"Apparently, Q's alternate enlisted the help of Tom to abduct and torture Vicki Ann for  
defeating him. Once he had them captured, he left them alone and allowed the two of  
them to argue. Tom grew very bitter and angry with Vicki Ann, because she took his  
duplicate's side and because she hated Tom for everything he had done and failed, in his  
opinion to see what William Riker had done wrong and what Tom had done right.   
  
"Q's alternate saw potential for torture in this and amplified Tom's anger at Vicki Ann,  
William Riker, and Deanna Troi and had Tom direct all of it at Vicki Ann. Q, stopped by his  
alternate, was unable to teleport himself or Vicki Ann out of there, brought in Dr. Crusher  
to help Vicki Ann. Q's brother, known to us as Q2, enlisted the help of the rest of the  
Continuum to get Vicki Ann, Q and Crusher out, while the Enterprise, closed the fissure,  
preventing Q's alternate from abducting Vicki Ann again," Sisko explained.   
  
Julian nodded.   
  
Lieutenant Anderson released the forcefield for the brig. Ensign Alvarez and Lieutenant  
Sparks restrained Thomas Riker while Anderson started to place the restraints on him. Tom  
flung his arms up and knocked his captors in the face. Anderson tried to get him, but Tom  
punched him. Tom ran out of the brig and grabbed a phaser. After incapacitating the three  
guards, he took their comm badges and deactivated them. Then he reactivated the  
forcefield. Tom ran down the corridor. He checked to see if his path was clear and then he  
entered the turbolift. "Computer, non-stop to Deck 8."   
  
A few moments later, he walked off the turbolift and checked his path. He walked down  
the hall a few meters until he arrived at a door marked 'Commander William T. Riker-First  
Officer.' He entered. Once he got in, he locked the door and headed for the bathroom. As  
he ran the razor across his face, he laughed to himself and said, "This is going to be  
interesting."   
  
After Tom finished in the bathroom, he changed into a uniform. He quickly searched the  
room until he found a phaser. Then, he headed for sickbay.   
  
Commander Riker sat in sickbay, talking to Vicki Ann. He was trying to cheer her up, but  
was having no luck. He glanced up when the door opened and gasped when he saw who  
had entered. Riker's first instinct was to tap his comm badge. "Riker to security-."   
  
He was interrupted by the intruder. "Don't even think about it, William. Or is it Thomas?"   
  
"You are Thomas," Commander Riker replied.   
  
"Are you sure about that?"   
  
Riker looked at Vicki Ann, who looked terrified. She looked from him to Tom and back again.  
  
Tom smiled at her. "Hello, Vicki Ann. Having a little chat with your best friend's duplicate?"   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head slowly. "No. This is Will. You are Tom."   
  
"Are you sure about that?"   
  
She nodded.   
  
"What if I told you that he was Tom and that he had broken out of the brig, shaved his  
beard and was posing as me to get closer to you?"   
  
Vicki Ann glanced at the two of them again.   
  
"Vicki Ann, I'm Will," Riker said.   
  
"No, I am," Tom replied.   
  
"Listen to me, Vicki Ann. I am Will. He is just playing mind games with you," Riker told her.   
  
Vicki Ann looked as if she wasn't sure if she believed him. She stood up and began to back  
away from him.   
  
"Vicki Ann, we have to get him back to the brig. I can't do it by myself. I need your help,"  
Tom said.   
  
Vicki Ann glanced around. She grabbed a medical instrument off the table beside her. She  
pointed it a Riker. "Get away from me."   
  
Riker glanced at the sharp edge on the edge of the instrument and then said to Vicki Ann,  
"Vicki Ann, put that down. It's me, Will."   
  
"I don't believe you," she replied.   
  
"Stop him, Vicki Ann. Don't let him hurt you again!" Tom screamed at her.   
  
Images of the attack flashed in Vicki Ann's head. She stepped toward Riker. She held up  
the medical instrument and moved it toward him. "I told you no, but you wouldn't listen."   
  
Beverly emerged from her office. "What is going on?" She saw Vicki Ann. "What are you  
doing?"   
  
Nurse Ogawa snuck up behind Tom and nailed him with a hypospray. Tom passed out.   
  
Vicki Ann stepped toward Riker and raised her arm. "I won't let you hurt me again." She  
was about to stab Riker in the chest with the instrument when a voice called, "Vicki Ann!"   
  
She turned and saw Julian beside her. She looked from Julian to Riker to the instrument in  
her hand. She dropped the instrument and the tears started to fall faster. "I'm so sorry."  
She looked at Will. "I'm sorry, Will. I-."   
  
Riker put his hand on her shoulder and said, "It's all right, Vicki Ann."   
  
Vicki Ann looked at Julian. "I'm sorry, Julian. I thought he was Tom. I'm sorry. I-." She fell  
to the floor and began to cry.   
  
Julian knelt down beside her and put his arms around her. "Don't worry. It's all right."   



	13. 13

Chapter 13   
  
Julian walked into his quarters on DS9. Vicki Ann was staying with him now that the  
Enterprise was docked. He saw that Vicki Ann and Deanna were sitting at the table in the  
dining room. He smiled at them. Vicki Ann just stood and ran into the other room. Julian  
sighed and sat down at the table with his head on his arms.   
  
Deanna put her hand on his arm. "Julian, it's nothing personal. You have to understand  
that she's very vulnerable right now and she's afraid of getting hurt. She's making herself  
distant to protect herself."   
  
Julian looked at her, his eyes blazing with anger; anger at himself, at Tom. "But she should  
know that I won't hurt her!"   
  
"She does, Julian, but her fear is in control right now, not her mind. You just have to give  
her some time. Keep trying, though. Social support is very important during times like this."  
  
Julian nodded.   
  
She stood. "If you need me, let me know."   
  
"I will." After she left, he went into the other room and tried to talk to Vicki Ann. She just  
ignored him. He sighed and said, "Alright. You don't have to talk. I have to go speak with  
Kira, anyway. So if you need me. . . I'll be in her office."   
  
She didn't reply, but he knew she heard him.   
  
Julian turned his back on her and went to Kira's office. Maybe a kindred spirit will help.   
  
Kira stepped onto the turbolift and told the computer her destination. She was on her way  
to Julian's quarters. He had asked her to talk to Vicki Ann about the assault and her own  
experiences in the Occupation. She had no idea what to say. Hello, Vicki Ann. Julian  
asked me to talk to you about my experiences. She sighed.   
  
That's good. I'll just remind her even more about her experience when all she wants to do  
is forget it ever happened. Although, it does help to know you're not alone in a situation  
like this. She decided that it was a good idea to talk to Vicki Ann. The turbolift stopped.  
"Well, here I go." She rang the chime for Julian's quarters. No answer. "Computer, where is  
Dr. Troi?"   
  
"Dr. Troi is in Dr. Bashir's quarters."   
  
She rang the chime again and leaned toward the door. "Vicki Ann, it's Kira. I'd like to talk  
to you."   
  
No answer.   
  
Kira flashed back to herself after she had been assaulted during the Occupation. She saw  
herself lying in the street, her clothes dirty and torn to pieces. Her face, bloody and  
bruised, was against the ground. She could felt a sharp pain in her chest as if she'd broken  
a rib or two and her head spun when she lifted it up. She thought she heard someone  
calling her name.   
  
"Nerys?"   
  
It was Shakkar. He helped her up and took her back to the camp. A few days later, while  
everyone was sleeping, she took his dagger. She wandered outside and away from the  
camp. Shakkar had noticed that she had left. When he found her, her arms were covered  
with blood and the dagger lay in her hand. He had taken her back to camp and wrapped  
her wrists. It had taken long time, but she had gotten over her fears and had been able to  
get on with her life.   
  
Kira's mind instantly thought the worst. She frantically overrode the security lock and  
raced into Julian's quarters. She went into the bedroom. She quickly scanned the room and  
saw Vicki Ann, lying unconscious on the bed. A Klingon dagger lay beside her. Flashes of  
red hit Kira's eyes as she ran over to the bed. "Vicki Ann!" She grabbed Vicki Ann's comm  
badge off the night table and placed it on her. Then she tapped her own. "Medical  
emergency! Transport Dr. Troi and myself to the infirmary! Dr. Bashir report to the  
infirmary immediately!" Kira grabbed Vicki Ann's wrists and tried to use her hands to stop  
the bleeding as they shimmered and disappeared.   
  
Julian sprinted into the infirmary. He saw his nurses frantically rushing around a patient. He  
saw Kira sitting on a biobed, sobbing, her hands covered in blood. As Julian approached  
the patient, one of the nurses moved and he saw that the patient was wearing a blue  
medical uniform. Oh God, no. He forced himself not to look and asked one of the nurses  
to fill him in.   
  
"Patient slit their wrists with a Klingon dagger. 20% blood loss."   
  
Julian started giving out orders to the nurses as he checked the extent of the damage.  
"These cuts are too deep for the dermal regenerator. Get me some bandages." He repaired  
what damage he could, cleaned up the wounds and bandaged her wrists. He again forced  
himself not to look at her face and instead at the life signs monitor. He told the nurses to  
start administering the transfusion and that he would be back to check on her. Julian  
cleaned himself up and then went over to Kira. "Are you alright?" he asked her, his voice  
still calm.   
  
She looked up at him, her eyes filled with fear. Her eyes focused on him and the fear  
disappeared. She nodded. "I'm fine. I just had a flashback when I found her."   
  
Julian handed her a towel to wipe her hands with. "What happened?" he asked, his voice  
shaking slightly.   
  
"I don't know. I went to go see her, like you asked me too, and she didn't answer. The  
computer said she was there and for some reason, I thought of myself when I had been  
attacked. I had slit my wrists with Shakkar's dagger and for some reason, I thought she  
might have done something similar. I overrode the privacy lock and went in. As soon as I  
found her, I called the infirmary."   
  
Julian nodded. He sighed and leaned against the biobed. "I can't believe she did this. She  
has a million friends she can talk to. Both her sister and close friend are psychologists.  
Why did she feel like this was her only option?"   
  
"Julian, after something like that happens, you feel as if the world has crashed down on  
you. You don't think you can trust anyone. Honestly, I'm surprised she lets any man near  
her."   
  
"That means she's able to discriminate that it was one man who did this to her and that  
the entire male species isn't evil," Ezri said, as she walked up to them. "Which is a good  
thing. Maybe we can use her trust in you, Julian, in her recovery."   
  
"How can we help her if she's going to try and kill herself?"   
  
"Can you take some time off from the infirmary? To stay with her?" Ezri asked.   
  
"Wait, we could take shifts. When I'm off duty, I can spend time with her, and so can you  
Ezri. That way, Julian won't have to leave the infirmary. He can spend the rest of his time  
with her," Kira suggested. She smiled slightly. "It won't be any different than normal for  
Julian."   
  
Ezri nodded. "That's a good idea. The thing is, we can't make her feel like she's being  
watched constantly. We have to incorporate her therapy into this time. I can work with  
her when I'm with her. Kira, you can get her to talk and you can share your experiences  
with her. Julian, you can try to help her to see that life is worth living and try to make her  
feel better. How's that?"   
  
Kira and Julian nodded.   
  
"Good. I suggest you take the rest of the day off, Julian and take her back to your  
quarters when she wakes up. Spend the day with her. Try to get her to talk about it, if  
you can. If not, make sure she knows that she can come to you if she has these feelings  
again. Other than that, just let her know that you care about her and that she's not  
alone. That's the most important thing. She has to know that she has people to help her  
through this."   
  
Julian Bashir walked over to the bar in Quark's and asked the Ferengi for a drink. He sighed  
and sat down at the bar, waiting for Quark to return. He felt a hand on his shoulder and  
turned around. He was greeted by O'Brien's smiling face.   
  
"Ready to be beaten at darts?"   
  
Julian forced a smile. "Only if I let you win."   
  
As Quark brought Julian his drink, O'Brien sat down at the bar. He watched his friend down  
a third of his drink in one gulp. He could see the exhaustion, both physical and mental, on  
Julian's face. He wanted to ask how everything was, but was unsure of how to word it. He  
looked at the bar for a moment and then turned to Julian. "Rough day?"   
  
Julian almost laughed. "You could say that. But then again, lately, every day is a rough  
day."   
  
"Well, that's what happens when you're the best doctor around."   
  
"I wish it was thought simple."   
  
O'Brien wasn't getting anywhere. He was hoping that Julian would mention the situation  
with Vicki Ann, but he was clearly avoiding it. "And everything else?"   
  
Julian looked at him. "Everything else is why I'm here." He sighed. "I'm going stir crazy in  
those quarters. I feel like all I'm doing is talking to the wall. She doesn't even listen to me  
anymore. Sometimes I feel it would be best if she had separate quarters."   
  
"But the fact that she chose to stay with you shows that she hasn't turned away from  
you completely. She still trusts you enough to let you near her."   
  
"Yes, but it's like I'm not even there."   
  
"Julian, she may not be answering you when you talk to her, but I'm sure just the sound of  
your voice is some comfort to her."   
  
"If I'm a comfort to her, then why am I constantly being told to leave by Ezri or Kira? Why  
does she turn away when I come near her? Why am I sleeping on the couch instead of by  
her side? Why does she cry alone at night and hide her tears when I come to comfort her?  
If I'm a comfort to her, why is she pushing me away?"   
  
"I don't know. I'm just an engineer, not a counselor. Have you talked to Ezri or Deanna  
about this?"   
  
"They keep telling me the same thing: that she needs time."   
  
"Well, then give it to her."   
  
"It's not that simple, Miles."   
  
"Why not?"   
  
"Because she may not have time."   
  
O'Brien was confused. "I don't understand."   
  
"I assume you heard that she was brought into the infirmary today." When O'Brien nodded,  
Julian continued. "Do you know why she was brought in? She tried to kill herself. Slit her  
wrists with Jadzia's dagger. Luckily, I had sent Kira to speak with her or I would be  
performing an autopsy on my girlfriend right now."   
  
"I'm sorry, Julian."   
  
"Don't be sorry. I should have expected it. It's common in situations like hers. I should  
have seen it coming." He hesitated before his next words. "I shouldn't have left her alone."  
He downed the rest of his drink.   
  
"It's not your fault."   
  
"Not totally."   
  
"Not at all. You're not responsible for her actions. You can't blame yourself for what she  
chose to do."   
  
"Not only am I supposed to be her doctor, but the man she loves. The man she expects to  
protect her, to take care of her. And I haven't done anything but cause her pain. Because  
I wasn't there."   
  
"Is that what this is about?"   
  
"What?"   
  
"You're upset that you weren't there when it happened? Julian, you can't be expected to  
be by her side twenty-four hours a day. Keiko and I are married and we don't even spend  
that much time together. Besides, when it happened, you were here, on DS9, where you  
belong, and she was God knows where. It wasn't under your control, so stop blaming  
yourself for it."   
  
"I suppose you're right," Julian replied, although O'Brien bet he really didn't mean it. "You  
know, I really don't feel much like playing darts tonight. I think I'm going to head back to  
my quarters and get some sleep."   
  
O'Brien nodded. "That sounds like a good idea. Good night, Julian."   
  
"Good night, Miles." Julian stood and headed back to his quarters, even though it was the  
last place he wanted to be.   
  
A few weeks later, Vicki Ann walked into the shrine. She laughed quietly to herself. This is  
the last place I'd thought I'd be. "Look," she said. "I'm not exactly what you could call a  
religious person, after all, I am a scientist. But I do know that something exists. Something  
above us and even the Q. After all, if Jadzia believed enough to come in here and talk to  
you, there's a pretty good chance you exist.   
  
"I also know that everything happens for a reason and nothing is left to chance. And as a  
scientist, I have trouble accepting things if I can't find a reason for them. So, I'm asking  
for a little help. Once I know the reasons for everything that has happened, I can accept  
it, deal with it and move on. And I really need to move on. So, I guess I'm asking for a  
leap of faith." She laughed and then grew serious. "Please."   
  
There was a blinding flash of light and Vicki Ann was knocked unconscious.   
  



	14. 14

Chapter 14  
  
When Vicki Ann awoke, she was no longer alone in the room. A woman with long, dark hair  
in a ponytail was standing with her back to Vicki Ann. Vicki Ann stood up and walked  
forward, toward the woman. The woman was talking to the Prophets, asking for help so  
that she and her new husband may have children.   
  
Vicki Ann gasped when she saw the woman's profile. "Jadzia!"   
Vicki Ann whispered out of shock. "Oh, my God! This must be the day she died." Vicki Ann  
noticed a Cardassian enter the room. Vicki Ann grabbed Jadzia's shoulders and screamed,  
"Jadzia, no! You'll be killed. Get out of here!"   
  
Jadzia did not see or hear her.   
  
A voice behind Vicki Ann said, "She can't here or see you. You have not traveled back,  
you are viewing it through a mirror."   
  
Vicki Ann turned around. Her father was standing beside her. "Daddy?"   
  
"I am not your father. I am merely a Prophet taking a familiar form."   
  
Vicki Ann turned back to Jadzia, who saw the Cardassian. Vicki Ann shook her head. "I  
can't watch this."   
  
Her father's voice replied, "Yes, you can and you must."   
  
Vicki Ann watched as her friend was brutally attacked. The scene shifted to Worf by  
Jadzia's bedside and Vicki Ann watched her friend's last few breaths. Vicki Ann's face was  
wet with tears.   
  
The scene shifted again to the bridge of a Klingon warship. On the bridge was Julian,  
Quark, Worf and O'Brien.   
  
Suddenly, Vicki Ann understood. "The shipyard," she said, smiling. "The shipyard." She  
laughed. She went over to Worf and grabbed him, although it had no effect. "Don't you  
see, Worf? The shipyard!"   
  
The scene shifted again. This time, the assault. She gasped and the tears started to fall  
again. "No." Stunned, she continued to watch the scene. "No," she repeated, her face  
twisted in pain. She turned to the Prophet. "No. I can't relive this."   
  
"Yes, you can and you must."   
  
The scenes that flashed before her were the most painful ones, the ones she had tried to  
bury deep in the back of her mind.   
  
The scene shifted to Julian, sitting in Sisko's office, being told about the attack.   
  
Vicki Ann could hear his thoughts, even thought the image wasn't real.   
  
Oh my God. Somebody's dead.   
  
Sisko explained what had happened.   
  
Julian suddenly felt as if he were in a room slightly bigger that himself and that the walls  
were beginning to close in on him. He swallowed, trying to compose himself. Why is it so  
damn hot in here? Alright. Calm down, Julian. Think about someone else for a change.  
Think about. . .Vicki Ann.   
  
An image popped into his head. Vicki Ann smiling at him as he stood on the transporter  
platform. The image changed to a bruised and beaten, tear stained Vicki Ann. Julian  
though he felt his heart stop.   
  
Gods, what am I going to do? I'm a doctor, I deal in physical wounds, not emotional ones.  
How in the world am I going to help the woman I love get through something like this?   
  
The scene shifted to Julian and Ezri talking in Julian's quarters.   
  
Julian shook his head. "How do you deal with something like this? Better yet, how do you  
help someone deal with something like this?   
  
"You just have to let them do things their way. And you have to give them lost of love and  
support," Ezri replied.   
  
"Is that all?"   
  
Ezri nodded. "Unfortunately, there isn't much you can do in a situation like this. Let's just  
hope she's able to deal with it eventually."   
  
"Why? What will happen if she doesn't?"   
  
Ezri sighed. "Well, she could lapse into a Betazoid coma from the trauma. Or develop some  
sort of psychiatric disorder. Or. . . . "   
  
"She could kill herself," Julian finished.   
  
Ezri was shocked. "Julian! Don't say that!"   
  
"Well, it's true."   
  
Ezri nodded slowly.   
  
Julian put his head in his hands. "God, Ezri, I don't know what I'll do if I lose Vicki Ann."   
  
"Don't say that, Julian. Don't even think it!"   
  
Julian grew angry. "I can't help it! Since it's a possibility, I can't help but think of it. And  
even if that didn't happen, if one of the other things you said happened. . . . "   
  
Ezri stood up and went over to Julian. "It doesn't have to happen. She could be fine."   
  
"But either way, I'd lose Vicki Ann. The only way to save her is to make sure she gets  
through this."   
  
"Julian, you have no control over whether she. . . . "   
  
Julian was determined. "I will make sure she gets through this."   
  
"Julian. . . ."   
  
Julian grabbed Ezri by the shoulders. "Don't you understand, Ezri?" he screamed. "I love  
her! I can't lose her!"   
  
Ezri put her hand on Julian's arm. "I know you do, but. . . . "   
  
Tears started to fall down Julian's face.   
  
Ezri hugged Julian. "Don't worry, Julian. You won't lose her. I promise."   
  
The scene changed to Julian and Vicki Ann in Julian's quarters. Vicki Ann sighed and said,  
"I remember this."   
  
The doors of Julian's quarters opened and he entered. Vicki Ann was sitting at the desk.  
"Beverly told me that she's worried about you. She says you're not getting enough rest.  
She's right. You haven't been sleeping very well. You haven't had more than a few hours a  
night if that. She suggested that I give you a sedative and a REM blocker."   
  
Vicki Ann replied, "I am a doctor, Julian. I can administer medication to myself if I need to.  
Besides, I don't need it. I'm fine."   
  
"No, you're not. If you were, you wouldn't be up half the night."   
  
"I'm fine, Julian."   
  
"Vicki Ann "   
  
Vicki Ann interrupted him. "Julian, I don't recall appointing you as my personal physician."'   
  
"I'm just worried about you. And I'm not the only one."   
  
"Why don't you start a club?"   
  
"Why are you being so defensive?"   
  
"I'm not being defensive!"   
  
"Yes, you are!"   
  
"Maybe I wouldn't be so defensive if you didn't treat me like a child!"   
  
Julian was shocked. "That's it, Vicki Ann! I give up! I don't know how to help you anymore!  
I'm going to stay with Chief O'Brien." And with that, he turned around and left.   
  
"Fine, then! Goodbye!" Vicki Ann screamed after him, but the door had already shut. Vicki  
Ann put her head in her hands and began to cry.   
  
The images disappeared. The only people left in the room were Vicki Ann and the Prophet.   
  
The Prophet walked over to her. "As you know, you have a prophecy to fulfill. Part has  
already happened and part is yet to come. It requires tremendous strength and therefore  
you needed to be tested. This and everything that has happened has been your test. You  
have far surpassed our expectations."   
  
Suddenly, she understood.   
  
Then there was a flash of light and all went black.   
  
"Vicki Ann, wake up," a familiar voice said.   
  
Vicki Ann opened her eyes and sat up. Ezri was standing beside her, as was Julian and  
Kira. Captain Sisko and Constable Odo stood in the background with Deanna and Will, along  
with Worf.   
  
"What happened?" Ezri asked.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled and looked at Sisko. "I spoke to your Prophets."   
  
"You did?" Sisko asked.   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I asked for reasons for everything that happened and I got them." She  
looked at Ezri and then at Worf. "I know why Jadzia had to die."   
  
Worf stepped forward.   
  
Vicki Ann got up and walked over to him. "She died so that you could go to the shipyard  
and win a battle in her honor for our side."   
She smiled. "Her death did have a reason, Worf. She did die with honor."   
  
Vicki Ann turned toward Julian, who looked quickly away. She went over to him. "Julian, I'm  
so sorry I've been so horrible. I've been too wrapped up in feeling sorry for myself."   
  
Julian smiled back. "It's okay. I guess I can put up with you if you have to fulfill a  
prophecy."   
  
Back in Vicki Ann's quarters on the Enterprise, a man paced. "Dammit!" He picked up a  
picture of Vicki Ann and Julian off of the dresser. "You're stronger than I thought.  
Especially when you have your friends." An evil smile crossed his face. "Well, how would  
you feel if you didn't have your friends? Better yet, how would you feel if your friends  
turned against you? If your friends weren't 'your' friends? Maybe that would be enough to  
turn you against your best friend. And since your friends are your world, maybe that will  
break you."   
  
Vicki Ann walked onto the Enterprise bridge. Almost no one was there. They were getting  
some routine maintenance done while they were at the station. The captain, was of  
course, one of the last ones to leave. She walked into the ready room. "Yes, captain?"   
  
He smiled at her. "Sit down."   
  
She did.   
  
"I've received some news. Tom confessed and the admiral has arranged for a lifetime  
sentence in a maximum security Cardassian prison and therefore, there is no need for a  
trial. He's being shipped tomorrow."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "That's wonderful. Odo will be glad to be rid of him. Thank you, captain.  
I'm sure some of this was your doing."   
  
"Don't be so sure. I'm not your only influential friend in Starfleet."   
  
Vicki Ann and Julian were having a goodbye dinner. The Enterprise was finished with  
repairs and Ezri felt that Vicki Ann's therapy had progressed enough for her to move back  
to the Enterprise.   
  
"I wish I didn't have to go," Vicki Ann said sadly, looking down at the table.   
  
"You wouldn't want to take a job on my staff, would you? Commander Sisko's been  
petitioning the Admiral to allow another doctor to be posted here. You'd be perfect," Julian  
replied, smiling.   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "Sorry. I've already got a job. Besides, that would be a big step,  
wouldn't it?"   
  
"Well, we could get you separate quarters."   
  
"We could, but you wouldn't hear of it. Right?"   
  
"I suppose so."   
  
"Besides, things are fine the way they are. There's an old Earth saying, "If it ain't broke,  
don't fix it." I think that would apply here."   
  
"I believe I've heard that one. And you're right."   
  
"Parting is such sweet sorrow."   
  
Julian and Vicki Ann spun around to see who had spoken. "Q!"   
they both exclaimed.   
  
"The one and only." Q shifted uncomfortably when he saw Vicki Ann frowning. "What?"  
When she didn't reply, he added, "Stop that! You look just like your mother when you do  
that and I have no desire to turn to stone."   
  
"What do you want?" she asked.   
  
"Who says I want anything? Can't I just stop by and visit my favorite mortal once in a  
while? And maybe I'm not even here to see you. I could be here to see. .  
.what's-his-name over there."   
  
"Julian," Vicki Ann replied.   
  
"Whatever."   
  
"What do you want?"   
  
Q held his hands up. "Alright, alright. I'm here to talk to you." He glanced at Julian. "And I  
guess he can stay, too."   
  
"Thanks a million," Julian muttered.   
  
"About what?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
"Recent events."   
  
"Go ahead."   
  
"I understand the Prophets spoke to you." Vicki Ann opened her mouth and Q held up his  
hand. "Don't even ask. I do not reveal my sources. Anyway, I understand they told you  
that the recent events involving Thomas Riker, as well as the other life changing events  
you've experienced since I left, have been tests of your strength."   
When she nodded, he continued. "This is true. I can also tell you that these tests are not  
over. The prophecy is not just a matter of you being in the right place at the right time  
and doing the right thing. It is a long, complicated series of events that all must occur for  
the good of many races, the Q, the Bajorans, the Federation. Each event may seem  
meaningful to one, but meaningless to another, but in the long run, all of the events  
together are very meaningful. What is meaningful about each event is the timeline that is  
averted. If just one event in the prophecy is not fulfilled, we will be thrown in alternate  
timeline with catastrophic repercussions. As the Prophets told you, you must know nothing  
about the prophecy before it is completed. As far as tests go, there are many more ahead  
of you. Some are just that, tests. And some are tests, but at the same time, part of the  
prophecy and essential. Is there anything I've told you that you don't understand?"   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "It's a lot of information to absorb, but I think I got it. If I don't  
watch, this could give me an inflated head," she said, smiling.   
  
"Don't let it go to your head. Everyone is part of some plan for this timeline. You just  
happen to know about yours and there are omnipotent beings trying to stop it."   
  
"Thanks."   
  
"As far as the situation with Riker's alternate, I wish to apologize for leaving you on the  
Enterprise. Things in the Continuum-"   
  
Vicki Ann placed her hand over his. "Don't worry, Q. I'm not angry that you left. You have  
a high position in the Continuum now and can't be expected to drop everything for a  
mortal. You also have a family that demands responsibility as well. Besides, I had enough  
social support to get me through it," she said, glancing at Julian.   
  
Q smiled. "Thank you for understanding, Vicki Ann. Speaking of the old ball and chain, she  
will be expecting me back right about now. Little q says hello to his Auntie Vicki Ann and Q  
says hello as well."   
  
"You may return the sentiment." She stood, went over to him and hugged him. "Give little  
q a hug from his Auntie, too."   
  
Q nodded. "And don't forget about the chimes."   
  
"I won't," Vicki Ann replied.   
  
Q waved. "Goodbye, Vicki Ann. Goodbye. . ."   
  
"Julian," Vicki Ann prompted.   
  
Q nodded. "Right. Goodbye, Julian." He snapped his fingers and vanished.   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. She turned to Julian. "Now, where were we?"   
  
Julian thought for a moment. "You were going to kiss me goodbye."   
  
"I was?"   
  
Julian nodded.   
  
"Oh, well, I was going to wait until tomorrow morning for your goodbye kiss, but if you  
want me to leave now, I'm sure Captain Picard won't mind me moving back early."   
  
"Of course I don't want you to leave now, but do I have to wait until tomorrow for my  
goodbye kiss?"   
  
"I guess not, as long as I have a place to stay for the night."   
  
Julian smiled. "I think we can arrange that."   



	15. 15

Chapter 15  
  
"We thought you might like to see this," was what Admiral Jefferies had said when he sent  
Jean-Luc Picard the video footage. The footage, taken from the Guardian of Forever,  
showed Vicki Ann being shot in the chest with some kind of energy beam. But,  
unfortunately, it was a slow death, the energy beam crackling and sizzling as it tore apart  
every molecule of its target. She made no sound, though her mouth was open in horror as  
if she was trying to scream and couldn't. The senior officers of the U.S.S. Enterprise  
cringed as they saw their comrade and friend die.   
  
Commander William T. Riker started to feel nauseous. He and Vicki Ann were still close,  
despite the fact that they had ended their romantic relationship and Riker had gotten back  
together with Deanna. Vicki Ann was his best friend and besides, she was Deanna's sister.  
He couldn't bear to see either of them hurt, especially Vicki Ann, whom he had promised  
himself he would protect after Tom assaulted her. He glanced over at Vicki Ann and saw  
that she was doing some kind of emotional control exercise. She had her eyes closed and  
was repeating something to herself over and over. She must have felt his eyes upon her  
and probably his thoughts too, because she opened her eyes and smiled at him. Riker saw  
right through it. She was playing the carefully controlled doctor again, allowing no one to  
see the pain she felt inside.   
  
Vicki Ann was smiling, but she was shaking inside. She had so many questions running  
through her head. Was this really her death? When would this happen? Who was going to  
kill her, or was it an accident? Suddenly, she heard the ringing of chimes in her head.  
"Something's wrong," she whispered.   
  
"No kidding," Riker muttered under his breath.   
  
Vicki Ann heard him. She looked over at him and said, "No, I heard the chimes and that  
means that something is wrong and the Q are protecting me."   
  
"You heard the chimes?" Riker asked.   
  
She nodded.   
  
"Well, then why don't you ask Q to tell you what the hell is going on here!" Riker snapped.   
  
Vicki Ann glared at him and said, "I will." She closed her eyes and concentrated, reaching  
out with mind, trying to give Q the slightest indication that she needed him. She couldn't  
tell him outright because they were separated by too vast of a distance. When she felt his  
reply, she opened her eyes and said matter of factly to Riker, "He's coming."   
  
Riker blushed ever so slightly.   
  
There was a flash of light and Q appeared. "You called, mademoiselle?" He was sitting on  
the table beside Vicki Ann.   
  
She gave him a look. "This isn't a time for jokes, Q. The chimes rang."   
  
Q's face became serious. "They did?"   
  
She nodded. "And we received this footage from Admiral Jefferies." She motioned to Data,  
who replayed the footage.   
  
Q watched, horrified. Then, when he saw the quick flash of the next image, he swallowed.  
He figured that Data was the only one who saw anything in the image, which Q was  
grateful for. The image was of a young man with dark hair talking to interesting black  
woman. Q didn't want anyone to find out the secret behind that image.   
  
"Well, do you know anything about this?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
"About what?" Q asked, momentarily shaken.   
  
"About the footage of my death from the Guardian!" Vicki Ann replied, exasperated. She  
studied him closely. "Are you all right?"   
  
Q's shaken expression became a more stable one. "Of course. This cannot be allowed to  
happen. We must go to the Guardian and stop it." He looked at Picard. "I know what  
you're going to say, Jean-Luc, so please don't give me one of your brilliant speeches about  
not polluting the timeline or violating Starfleet regulations. This is beyond you, beyond  
Starfleet, and beyond even me. The prophecy must be fulfilled or it could have  
catastrophic consequences."   
  
"What exactly is this prophecy?" Picard asked.   
  
Q shook his head. "I don't know and even if I did, I couldn't tell you. I will tell you this,  
Picard. The Prophets felt that the prophecy was important enough to save Vicki Ann's  
life."   
  
"How?" Picard asked, confused.   
  
Q looked at Vicki Ann. "You didn't tell them?"   
  
"How did you find out?"   
  
"We communicate with the Prophets often. Why didn't you tell them?"   
  
"I didn't feel it was necessary." Vicki Ann stared at the table for a minute, collecting her  
strength. "While I was in the shrine on DS9, I gave myself twenty cc's of cyarethaline."   
  
Beverly gasped. "Vicki Ann, that was enough to kill you!"   
  
"Exactly what she wanted," Riker replied, glancing at Vicki Ann.   
  
She nodded slowly. "Everything was a mess. I couldn't deal with all of it. I felt that no  
matter how hard I tried, I screwed up everyone else's lives. I thought that you all would  
be better off without me."   
  
"That's the furthest from the truth," Q said, smiling.   
  
Everyone looked at him in shock.   
  
"I mean, I'm sure that little q would miss the chocolates from his Auntie Vicki Ann," Q  
replied.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "I'm sure he would."   
  
Riker looked at Vicki Ann. "You do understand that Q is right, don't you? We'd be lost  
without you."   
  
She nodded, smiling.   
  
"Captain, we are now approaching the planet," Vicki Ann told Picard.   
  
"Standard orbit," Picard replied.   
  
"Aye, sir," Vicki Ann replied.   
  
"Captain, we are being hailed," Lieutenant Stirland replied.   
  
"On screen." Picard straightened his uniform shirt. This ought to be fun, he thought to  
himself.   
  
One of the scientists assigned to the planet appeared on the screen. "Captain, I must ask  
you to leave. The planet is under strict quarantine, as you well know. The Council has  
been rather tough with security ever since the incident with the alternate Riker a few  
years ago."   
  
Picard nodded. "I know. But, this is a matter of life and death."   
  
The scientist nodded. "I understand, captain, but the Federation Counsel has-."   
  
Picard interrupted. "This is beyond the Council." Picard motioned to the man who was  
standing beside Deanna. "I apologize, but as I said, this is a matter of life and death. Our  
life and death."   
  
The man sitting beside Deanna and snapped his fingers and at the exact same time, the  
scientist on the plant froze in mid- protest. "The coast is clear, mon capitaine."   
  
Picard nodded. "Q, please take the away team to the planet."   
  
"As you wish."   
  
Now   
  
Vicki Ann, Riker, and Q arrived on the planet. All was quiet. Vicki Ann glanced at the  
Guardian and was immediately mesmerized. "Oh, my God." She deactivated the forcefield  
surrounding the Guardian and walked closer to it.   
  
"Be careful!" Riker shouted at her.   
  
She waved her arm in reply as she continued walking.   
  
Q noticed a man come out form behind one of the buildings. "Stop," he yelled to the man.   
  
The man continued to walk toward the Guardian and Vicki Ann.   
  
Q snapped his fingers to freeze the man, but it had no effect.   
  
Riker had noticed the man, too. "Q, do something!"   
  
"I can't!"   
  
The man turned to Q. "I can't let you do this! I cannot allow you to interfere with what  
must be done."   
  
Vicki Ann looked up, just as the man shot her in the chest with an energy beam. She flew  
into the Guardian from the impact.   
  
Q shook his head. Vicki Ann had gone into the timeline he didn't want anyone to know  
about. Oh well, at least with my younger self there, she's got a fighting chance of staying  
alive.   
  
"What happened, Q?" Picard asked, his face grim.   
  
"I believe we were mistaken. It is unlikely that Vicki Ann will die as a result of her injuries.  
My younger self is in the timeline she has entered and therefore, I believe that she was  
meant to enter the Guardian."   
  
Then   
  
A dark skinned woman walked the streets of San Francisco. She had come back here to  
try and forget the pain she'd been through recently. She'd ended a rather bad relationship  
with a very controlling and jealous man and she needed some time to clear her head. Or at  
least forget about it. Something up ahead caught her eye. It was a woman, in some sort  
of uniform, lying unconscious on the ground. The dark woman ran to the other to assist  
her. Maybe it wouldn't be so hard to forget after all.   
  
Vicki Ann awoke in some sort of hospital. It looked faintly familiar, like she'd seen a picture  
of it somewhere. She sat up and glanced around. The equipment seemed archaic  
compared to what she was used to on the Enterprise. That explained why she was in pain  
and had bandages on her. Doctors rushed by in the doorway, most of them dressed in  
white coats. She had a feeling of deja-vu, as if she'd seen this place before. Then, she  
remembered. She'd seen pictures in the history books at the Academy. She was in a  
hospital. By the looks of it, before the founding of the Federation, since there was no sign  
of any insignia or symbols anywhere. She had gone back in time, through the Guardian,  
over two hundred years. A doctor entered the room. "Hello. How are you feeling today?"   
  
Vicki Ann smled back. "I'm fine, except for some soreness."   
  
The doctor nodded. "That's to be expected, with the extent of your injuries. You should  
be fine in a few days. Do you remember what happened to you?"   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "No, I'm sorry, but I don't."   
  
"We found you on the street. You clothes were torn and you were unconscious. You had  
multiple cuts and bruises. Your also had a few broken ribs and it seems you were hit by  
some sort of an energy blast. You're positive you don't remember what happened to you?"   
  
Vicki Ann thought about it. She couldn't tell him anything because it would pollute the  
timeline. "No, I'm sorry, but I can't remember anything."   
  
"Given the evidence, I'd say you were attacked. I've notified the police and they will be  
coming in to speak to you and the woman who found you."   
  
"The woman who found me?"   
  
"Yes, I believe her name is Guinan."   
  
Guinan?   
  
"I'm sorry, but I have other patients to check on."   
  
The doctor nodded at Vicki Ann and then left. A few moments later, a woman entered. It  
was a younger looking Guinan. "Hello," she said, smiling. "Are you feeling better?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "Much better. The doctor says I should be fine in a few days. I'm lucky  
that you found me."   
  
"Yes, you are." She eyed the other woman carefully. "Now, why don't you tell me what  
you're doing here."   
  
"Pardon?"   
  
"I know you're from the future. Mr. Data's time, I believe. The insignia on your uniform  
resembled his."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "I should have know better than to try and fool you."   
  
"Then we are acquainted?"   
  
"Yes. You're on the Enterprise."   
  
"What is your job there?"   
  
"Well, I'm a doctor, but I'm also a pilot. Most of the time, I'm the helmsman."   
  
"Then you know Mr. Data and the others as well?"   
  
"Yes, Deanna, the counselor, is my sister. As for your question, I don't know why I'm here.  
You see, it was an accident. We came across some disturbing footage of me in the  
Guardian of Forever on Time Planet and went to investigate. Someone attacked me and I  
was thrown into the Guardian and ended up here."   
  
"Sounds like quite an adventure."   
  
"My whole life is an adventure." A thought occured to her. "What happened to my things?"  
  
"Your uniform was taken as evidence. Your badge and other things were given to me. I  
have them here." Guinan handed them to Vicki Ann. In her hand was a silver bracelet, Vicki  
Ann's comm badge, and a picture of a man in a similar uniform. "Is that your boyfriend?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded and took the picture, smiling. "Yes. His name is Julian. He's a doctor,  
too."   
  
"I'll bet you miss him."   
  
"Only a little more than usual. He's the CMO of a station and with me traveling all the time,  
I don't see him all that much. What makes it worse this time, is that there's two hundred  
years between us, that and the fear that I might never get home."   
  
"I'm sure your friends are looking for you."   
  
"I hope so."   



	16. 16

Chapter 16   
  
Now   
  
"When exactly is she?" Riker asked Q.   
  
Q thought for a second. "About the early twenty-first century."   
  
"Where?"   
  
"San Francisco, although not for long."   
  
"Why is that?"   
  
"Because she and an acquaintance are about to find themselves in some trouble."   
  
"Exactly who is this acquaintance?"   
  
"Riker, I do believe you are being a bit intrusive!"   
  
Riker became angry. "When a member of this crew is missing, it's my job to find out all I  
can to get them back. I don't think that's being intrusive!"   
  
Q was offended. "Having trouble choosing, are we? Why don't you just pick a woman?"   
  
"Dammit, Q!"   
  
Deanna stood up and put her hand up between Q and Riker. "We're not helping Vicki Ann  
any by screaming at each other. Both of you are upset over what's gone and you're taking  
it out on each other. It would do everyone a lot of good if we all calmed down."   
  
"Listen to her, Riker. She's right."   
  
Riker sighed and sat down. "We have to get her back before she pollutes the timeline."   
  
"Don't worry about that, Riker. She already has. She was meant to pollute the timeline."   
  
"How do you know that?"   
"Because I was there!"   
  
"Are you telling me that your younger self has interacted with and will interact with Vicki  
Ann?"   
  
"Yes. I had been wiped from my memory, but being near the Guardian has made me  
remember."   
  
"Q, are you saying that you knew Vicki Ann before the experiment?" Deanna asked.   
  
"Yes," Q replied. "But I didn't remember."   
  
Picard interrupted. "Are you saying that someone erased your memory?"   
  
"Not only erased, but replaced. They took out all the memories pertaining to her and  
replaced them with false ones."   
  
"Who did this to you?" Picard asked.   
  
Q, who was now leaning against the table, weak from exhaustion, replied, "The Q."   
  
"Why?"Deanna asked.   
  
"They knew of her prophecy long before then and there were those who would stop at  
nothing to prevent the prophecy from coming true. Therefore, I was a threat to their plan.  
They know that I would try to stop them if I knew who it was."   
  
Riker, shocked, put his face in his hands. "Oh my God, this is deeper than we thought.   
  
"Q, is there anything else that you can tell us about where Vicki Ann is?" Picard asked.   
  
Q sighed. "Yes, but I would rather not. To do so would expose not only secrets of the Q,  
the acquaintance involved, and myself. Really, Jean-Luc, do you want to know all of my  
secrets?"   
  
Picard grew impatient. "Q, I want to know if Vicki Ann is all right and I want some evidence  
to back up your answer. I will not play games when it comes to a member of my crew!"   
  
"I will consider it, Jean-Luc."   
  
"Q!"   
  
"Mon capitaine, if she was meant to go to that timeline, then we won't be able to get her  
out any sooner than we're supposed to."   
  
Picard sighed. "Unfortunately, Q, you may be right."   
  
Julian Bashir was closing the infirmary for the night when the computer announced that he  
had a message. "Incoming message from the Enterprise."   
  
Julian smiled as he went into his office. It was probably Vicki Ann. She had probably just  
finished her shiftand gone back to her quarters. She would whine about no shore leave and  
how much she missed him. He sat down at his desk and turned on the viewer. To his  
surprise, Deanna's face appeared instead of Vicki Ann's.   
  
"Hello, Julian."   
  
Something was wrong. He could sense it. How, he didn't know. Deanna's face looked  
normal and showed no sign of stress, but he knew something was wrong. "What  
happened?"   
  
"Vicki Ann is missing." Deanna then explained about the incident with the Guardian.   
  
"Oh my God," Julian gasped.   
  
Deanna tried to comfort him. "Q is confident that she will be fine and that it's part of the  
prophecy."   
  
"Are you sending a rescue?"   
  
"Starfleet agrees with Q and therefore, is not sending a rescue mission."   
  
"One officer isn't enough to send a team after when you're in a war."   
  
"Exactly. We're going to stay a little longer here, just in case."   
  
Julian nodded.   
  
"Julian, I just want you to know that we're all worried about her. You're not alone. If you  
need to talk to someone. . ."   
  
"I know, Deanna. Thank you."   
  
"You're welcome. If we find out anything, you'll be the first to know. Goodbye."   
  
"Goodbye." Julian cut the link. He put his head in his hands and cried.   
  
Q sat on Vicki Ann's bed, glancing around the room. Everything was as she had left it. On  
her night table was a framed picture of her and Deanna and another of Bashir. Around the  
rest of the room were various other pictures; on her desk was one of Jadzia and Worf and  
one of Lwaxana and Vicki Ann's new baby brother; on her dresser was one of himself, Q,  
and little q (he had given her that one). Her viewer was up on her desk, a letter started to  
Bashir. Q read the letter.   
  
"Dear Julian,   
It's nice to be back, but there's one thing missing: you. I know, real mushy, but it's true.  
Your picture is right beside my bed, so you are the first thing I see in the morning and the  
last I see at night. By the way, in case you hadn't noticed, I borrowed your robe. I took it  
while you were at the infirmary the day I left. It smells like you, so I sleep in it every  
night. I refuse to wash it, for fear it will lose the scent. Enough of that. So, how are  
things at the station? I know, things probably haven't changed much since I was there.   
  
I talked to mother. She is absolutely ecstatic. She asked when the wedding was (just  
kidding). She did hint, though, with her subtle, "You're not getting any younger, dear." I  
told her your cover story and she told me that you were no good if you had to wait ten  
years to get married. I managed to convince her otherwise, but I'm sure she will still push  
the subject."   
  
That was it. She had never finished. Her closet was full of uniforms. Looks like she just did  
the laundry. Q jerked as Vicki Ann's alarm clock went off. He smiled as he recognized the  
song she had programmed the clock to play. It was the one Riker had written for her and  
played the night of the party. He smiled. Vicki Ann would tease the hell out of him when  
she got back for all of his sentimentality. He couldn't wait.   
  
Deanna walked down the corridor. Beverly had asked her to get some files from Vicki Ann's  
computer. She used her security code to enter. When she walked in, she was startled  
when she saw someone in there, sitting on the bed. She heaved as sigh of relief when the  
person stepped into the light.   
  
It was Q. He smiled at her. "I'm sorry I startled you."   
  
Deanna smiled back. "It's all right. I'm just a little shaky, that's all. I mean with everything  
that's going on."   
  
Q nodded.   
  
"You're worried about Vicki Ann, aren't you? Even though you've been there and know  
what happens, you also know that things could change."   
  
"How did you know that?"   
  
"Lucky guess."   
  
He laughed. "You're right, though. With so many that wish to stop the prophecy, she's in  
danger no matter where she goes."   
  
"It must be tough, knowing what can happen and not being able to stop it."   
  
"It is."   
  
"Q, I know you won't tell the captain, but would you tell me about the timeline where she  
is?"   
  
Q glanced out the window and then back to Deanna. "As I said, I didn't remember anything  
about Vicki Ann. But now, my memory has returned. I rescued Vicki Ann and an  
acquaintance from execution."   
  
"Q, exactly who is this acquaintance?" Deanna asked.   
  
Q sighed. "My relationship with Vicki Ann has enabled me to trust you. The acquaintance is  
Guinan."   
  
"What exactly was the situation?"   
  
"Well, it all started when Vicki Ann moved in with Guinan."   
  
Ezri Dax walked into the infirmary. She wanted to check on Julian. She had been very busy  
the last few days and hadn't been able to talk to him much. As far as she could tell, Julian  
was hiding his real feelings about Vicki Ann's disappearance. Julian was working at his desk  
in his office. He was burying himself in his work as much as possible. Ezri smiled. That  
sounded like something Vicki Ann would do. It was amazing how much the two of them  
were alike. She peeked her head in the doorway. "Julian?"   
  
He looked up and forced a smile. "Hello, Ezri. To what do I owe this pleasure?"   
  
Ezri frowned. "I came to see how you were feeling."   
  
"I'm fine. Why?"   
  
Ezri sat down across from him. "Julian, Vicki Ann, the woman you claim to love, is missing  
with no hope of rescue. You shouldn't be feeling fine."   
  
"Ezri-"   
  
"Julian! This isn't a joke. This is serious. If you don't start dealing with this, then I'm going  
to have to report you to Captain Sisko and have you relieved of duty. And since we're in  
the middle of a war, I would say that wouldn't be a good thing."   
  
"But, I'm fine. I already told you that."   
  
"I'm a counselor, Julian. I know that in situations like this, people often lie to themselves  
and other people about their feelings. My guess is that's what you're doing now."   
  
"That's Jadzia talking, isn't it? You're basing your hypothesis on my past behavior."   
  
"Yes, I am."   
  
Julian leaned back in his chair and sighed. "You're right, Ezri. I am lying about my feelings.  
I just didn't want to worry you."   
  
"It's natural for you to be upset in this situation."   
  
"I know, but I-"   
  
"Julian, it's me, Dax. You can tell me anything."   
  
Julian sighed again. "Okay, Ezri. Yes, I am worried about Vicki Ann and I'm angry that  
Starfleet isn't doing anything about it. How's that?"   
  
"It's a start. For now, I'm going to quit while I'm ahead and leave it at that."   
  
Julian walked into his quarters. He started to ask the computer for lights, but then decided  
that he liked the dark better in this mood. He went over to the replicator and got a cup of  
tea. Deciding it reminded him too much of her, he put the tea down on the coffee table  
and sat on the couch. He stared out the window, hoping that the brilliant light of the stars  
that was filling the great void of space would fill his own void. The void he felt inside  
because Vicki Ann, his friend, the woman he had fallen in love with, was gone. He dare not  
speak the fears he felt inside, afraid that they would come true if he did so. He feared  
that she was gone forever, just as Jadzia was gone.   
  
Memories flashing in his mind threatened to bring tears to his eyes as he fought to remain  
calm. He remembered the day he had met her, how he had been taken by her beauty and  
intimidated by her reputation, but had been immediately at ease because of the warmth at  
which she smiled at him, a complete stranger. He remembered her eyes and how they  
always sparkled when she smiled and how their color grew darker when she became angry.  
  
He remember how their relationship had begun in a whirlwind and had almost suffocated  
them with its intensity. They had quickly found out that they were made for each other  
and no matter how quickly they had been brought together, it was meant to be. She had  
become the light of his life, her letters and messages giving him enough joy to sustain him  
for a lifetime.   
  
He remembered the little things, too. The day he introduced her to Tarkalean tea. The  
night they stayed up talking. How she looked while she lie asleep, with the light of the  
stars illuminating her face. How she looked in that red dress she'd worn on their first date.  
The warmth of her body against his under the blanket in her quarters. The sound of her  
laugh. The unrestrained passion of their first kiss.   
  
His hands reached out, unconsciously for her for comfort, but all they found was the rough  
fabric of the couch. His fingers grasped the back of the couch as if he were at the edge of  
a cliff and was afraid he might fall off. He felt the tears begin to sting his warm face as he  
gave up fighting and let his grief consume him. He laid his head on the back of the couch  
and sobbed for his light to return and never leave again.   
  
Then   
  
Vicki Ann jerked awake with a terrible feeling of sorrow. She gasped for air and wiped the  
sweat from her face. A face flashed in her head. Julian. She had dreamt about Julian. Her  
chest felt tight and she could barely breathe. She felt as if she been sobbing  
uncontrollably. Gods, what he must be going through. Not knowing whether I'm alive or  
dead. Not knowing where I am and if I'll return. The thought brought tears to her own  
eyes. That's it! I've got to find a way home and quit trying to find out why I'm here. I  
have to act normal, as if I know absolutely nothing about the prophecy. I have to find  
away to get back to where I belong. She looked out the window. It was near dawn. She  
got out of bed, dressed, left a note for Guinan and went in search of a way home.   
  
Vicki Ann walked and walked, not finding anything that might help her get home. She  
ended up sitting in a bench in a park and watching the sunrise. A short while later, she  
noticed someone approaching her. It was Guinan.   
  
"What were you thinking? Coming out before dawn, all by yourself? And looking for a way  
home by yourself? This isn't as safe as your home."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "You're right. I wasn't thinking. But, I just had to get out of there. I've  
decided that I'm going to forget about the prophecy and find a way home."   
"That sounds like a good idea. I might be able to help you with the part about getting  
home."   
  
"How?"   
  
"I can contact my father and get us passage to the Guardian."   
  
"Really?"   
  
Guinan nodded.   
  
"And you would come with me?"   
  
"Yes, after all, like I said, this place isn't as safe as where you're from."   
  
Vicki Ann hugged Guinan. "Thank you, thank you!"   
  
"Just promise me you'll do one thing when you get back."   
  
"Anything."   
  
"Say hello to your friends for me. Especially the captain and Mr. Data."   
  
"I will, I promise."   



	17. 17

Chapter 17   
  
Less than a week later, Vicki Ann Guinan were getting a shuttle to Alpha Centauri, where  
they would meet their ride to Time Planet. When they arrived, they were greeted by a  
Romulan. Vicki Ann immediately thought that something was wrong. Romulans didn't have  
warp drive at this point. That meant that either the ship was stolen or they were being  
deceived. She listened to the man's thoughts and decided the latter. She turned to warn  
Guinan, but Guinan already knew.   
  
"We've changed our mind. We don't want to go after all."   
  
The Romulan smiled. "No refunds, no exchanges. You're going on a trip whether you like it  
or not, humans."   
  
Vicki Ann didn't even try to tell him that she was only half human and that Guinan wasn't  
at all. She figured he wouldn't listen to her anyway. She cursed the fact that phasers  
hadn't been invented yet. The Romulan went to grab her and she tried to kick him but was  
prevented from doing so. Apparently, a prelude to the disruptor had been invented.   
  
"Get in," ordered the Romulan.   
  
Vicki Ann and Guinan obeyed.   
  
The Romulan closed the door to their small compartment and went to the pilot's seat. It  
was then when Vicki Ann realized when exactly she was. She had ended up just before the  
war with the Romulans. And she and Guinan had just become the first prisoners of war.   
  
"So, how did you meet Q?" Vicki Ann asked Guinan, after they'd been in captivity for a few  
days.   
  
"My father sent him to bring me home."   
  
"He didn't do a very good job, did he?"   
  
Guinan smiled and then became serious. "He fell for me. He decided to stay. He managed  
to talk my father into letting me stay a little longer. Unfortunately, when the time came, I  
still wouldn't leave. I finally managed to persuade my father into letting me decide when I  
leave."   
  
"Why were you and Q arguing?"   
  
"He wanted me rekindle our relationship."   
  
"And obviously you don't want that."   
  
"No. He was jealous, controlling and hot-tempered."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "That sounds like my Q."   
  
Guinan looked at her quizzically.   
  
"Q and I were involved for awhile and eventually became very good friends."   
  
"I can't imagine anyone being friends with him."   
  
"It's difficult, but when you can read his mind, it's not that bad. He can't hide from me. He  
can't fool me."   
  
"That would have its advantages."   
  
"Although now it does present its disadvantages."   
  
"For instance?"   
  
"Besides making Julian jealous? Well, his wife doesn't like it much. That and he knows when  
I'm lying. Which I do fairly often. I'm not a liar, mind you. Just about my feelings."   
  
"I see." She glanced around. "Well, since we'll be here for a while, why don't you tell me  
about Julian?"   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "I love him very much. I don't we haven't been together that long, but I  
feel as if we're fated to be together. Things were crazy at first, but after he helped me  
get through some rough times, I realized that he was the one for me. He's absolutely  
wonderful, Guinan. He's the ideal doctor. No one would dare be afraid of him. Not even the  
children are afraid of him. And he's brilliant, of course. We're so much alike too." She  
blushed slightly. "I'm rambling a bit here, aren't I?"   
  
"It's okay."   
  
"It's just that I'm nervous and I want to get home."   
  
"I understand. I don't exactly want to be a prisoner myself."   
  
"What I want to know is why they've kidnaped us. We didn't do anything and the war  
hasn't even started yet."   
  
"That's a very good question."   
  
A few hours later, the door to their room opened and Vicki Ann and Guinan were greeted  
by their captain. He smiled at them.   
  
"Come. We've arrived at Romulus. It's time for your trial," he said.   
  
"What trial? What have we done?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
"You are terrorists. You were involved in the attack on the capital."   
  
"We did no such thing!"   
  
"Do not lie! We have witnesses! Come." He pointed his weapon at them. "Now!"   
  
Guinan and Vicki Ann followed him. After the captain conferred with a few others while  
they were closely guarded, they were led into a prison cell.   
  
"I thought you said we were going to our trial."   
  
"That was a joke. There are no trials here. All criminals are punished immediately. Except in  
rare circumstances such as yours."   
  
"What circumstances would those be?"   
  
"The Praetor must attend all executions and he is unavoidably delayed. Therefore, you will  
be detained until he arrives."   
  
A few days later, the Praetor came to Vicki Ann and Guinan's cell. "Hello, welcome to  
Romulus. I hope you've enjoyed your stay."   
  
"It's lovely here. In fact, I think it would be a good idea for you to start having tour  
groups here. Just advertise it as 'out of the ordinary.' People will love it," Vicki Ann replied.  
  
"Watch yourself, that mouth could get you in trouble," replied the Praetor.   
  
"Big deal. I'm already being executed for a crime I didn't commit."   
  
"It is time," said the Praetor to his men.   
  
The assigned executioner turned to his leader. "How do you wish them to die?"   
  
"How about we do to them what they did to our people at the capital?"   
  
"Excellent. We'll take them to one of the underground mining caverns and place the bomb  
in there."   
  
"Very well then. Take them to the mines."   
  
"I think I liked our cell better," Vicki Ann muttered as she and Guinan sat in the cavern  
that would soon be their grave. As the execution party left, she realized that this was not  
a game. She and Guinan were going to die in a matter of minutes. "No, no, no," she  
whispered as she curled herself up into a ball on the ground. Then, with determination, she  
sat up and screamed, "NO! I can't die like this! Not here! Not now! Not when I've just  
found my family! Not when I've just found Julian! NO!" She stood and looked up at the  
ceiling. "Q," she whispered. "I know you're far away, but if you can hear me, please help  
me! I don't care if this is the damned prophecy! I will not die like this!"   
  
Guinan went over to her and put her arm around Vicki Ann comfortingly.   
  
Then, there was a flash of light and Vicki Ann sighed with relief that her prayers had been  
answered.   
  
"I know I'm not your Q, but I can get your out of here."   
  
"What's your price?" Guinan asked.   
  
"None. My mother would have wanted me to do this."   
  
Vicki Ann went up to Q and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you."   
  
"You're very welcome, but if you don't mind, I don't want to be here when this bomb goes  
off."   
  
Vicki Ann stepped away.. "Go ahead. Work your magic."   
  
Q snapped his fingers and disappeared, just before the caverns were reduced to a pile of  
rubble.   
  
"Those men weren't telling the truth," Vicki Ann took Guinan after Q had transported them  
away from Romulus and to Time Planet.   
  
"I could tell, but I didn't know what the truth was."   
  
"The Praetor was newly moved into that position. The attack on the capital killed the  
previous one and this one took his place. That's why he had the bomb placed in the  
capital building. When he was asked to find the culprits, he named human terrorists. Then  
he had one of his men attempt to find some scapegoats that would be punished for the  
crime. That's where we came in."   
  
"Very clever. Too bad he missed one thing."   
  
"What's that?"   
  
"He didn't count on your connections."   
  
Vicki Ann turned to Q. "You have to tell someone on Earth about the Praetor."   
  
"Why?"   
  
"Because that's how history goes. A human uncovers the conspiracy and Earth takes  
action for the execution of two of their citizens. That's how the war starts."   
  
"If you say so."   
  
"Thank you for bringing me here."   
  
"You're welcome."   
  
"See you in about two hundred and fifty years." She turned to Guinan and embraced her.  
"I'll see you in about the same time. Thank you for you help. And I will remember to say  
hello to everyone for you."   
  
Guinan smiled. "You're more than welcome. I'm very glad we met. Both times. Have a good  
trip."   
  
Vicki Ann was about to walk through the Guardian when a bolt of lightning struck the  
ground in front of her. The impact shook the ground and Vicki Ann lost her balance and fell  
into the Guardian at the wrong moment.   
  
There   
  
Security Officer Deanna Troi looked over the shoulder of Commander Riker. They were  
tracking the scenes being displayed at the Guardian of Forever. They had been alerted to  
a scene involving Victorianna Leonard of the alternate universe. She had been shot and  
was thrown in the Guardian. Troi had requested that they track the Guardian and alert her  
when and image showing Victorianna appeared.   
  
Riker turned around and smiled slightly at Troi, who returned the mischievous smile. "What  
are you plans once we find the image? Are you going to send someone in after her?"   
  
"Possibly. I haven't decided what she is worth to us yet."   
  
"I can imagine she would be worth a lot to her captain, but as for Starfleet, they would  
consider her indispensable."   
  
"I'm not so sure about that. From what I hear, Victorianna has a lot of friends in high  
places that would do anything to keep her alive."   
  
"Do you think that's true? After all, she is just a Starfleet Doctor with pilot training, isn't  
she?"   
  
"Looks can be deceiving, Riker. It had better be true, otherwise, Victorianna might find  
herself in an undesirable situation."   
  
Vicki Ann landed on the same planet she had been on. "What the hell?" It was different,  
somehow. Maybe it was nothing. The buildings that were supposed to be there were  
there. The forcefield was there. Nothing seemed different. Nothing except for a small  
camera that she couldn't see. A camera that watched to see who entered and exited the  
Guardian.   
  
"Commander Riker! Someone has emerged from the Guardian!" a Lieutenant shouted from  
across the room.   
  
Riker and Troi sprinted over to the station to see the image. Sure enough, on the screen  
was an image of Vicki Ann emerging from the Guardian. Troi turned to Riker. "You are to  
wear one of the replicated uniforms and beam to the surface. You will attempt to convince  
her that you are the Commander Riker from her time. Tell her that the Enterprise has come  
for her. Understood?"   
  
Riker nodded.   
  
Riker transported to the planet. When he saw Vicki Ann he smiled his best fake smile. "Are  
you all right? We've been waiting for you to come out. You've been in there for over a  
week!"   
  
She gave him a strange look, but smiled back. "Thank goodness you're here. You won't  
believe what I found out about Q."   
  
"Really? That juicy, huh?"   
  
Vicki Ann felt something tugging at the barriers that surrounded her mind. Curiosity got the  
best of her, so she slowly let them down. She sensed something from Riker, like he was  
hiding something from her. She opened them up the rest of the way. She had to force  
herself not to cry out. He was filled with jealousy and rage. What could have happened  
while she was gone to make him change like that? She tried to read his thoughts. For a  
moment, she heard them. I wonder what Troi is going to do with her? Drill her for  
information? Hold her for ransom? Or kill her like Q had originally wanted? It would be a  
shame to waste someone with her powers. She may be useful. Perhaps she would be  
willing to bargain for her life and perform a few small favors for us. Maybe corrupt that  
immaculate soul of hers.   
  
Then, the door slammed shut on her. It was almost as if Riker or someone else had  
slammed the door shut. But Riker didn't have the power to do that. The only one who  
could was. . . . Deanna. Something is wrong, Vicki Ann thought to herself. This isn't my  
timeline.   
  
Riker tapped his comm badge. "Riker to Enterprise. Two to beam up." They shimmered and  
disappeared.   
  



	18. 18

Chapter 19   
  
When they reappeared in the transporter room, Vicki Ann couldn't help but gasp. This  
wasn't her ship. The transporter room was different. She was about to grab her phaser  
and point it at Riker when someone grabbed her from behind. They attached something to  
her wrist. She struggled and ran her heel down the shin of her attacker. He jumped back in  
pain. Vicki Ann started to run, but Riker grabbed her. He held her arms behind her. He  
leaned his face toward her face. "Don't even think about it. You're not going anywhere,"  
he whispered in her ear.   
  
The doors of the room opened and a woman entered. She had dark curly hair and stood  
proud and tall. She smiled at Vicki Ann. "Welcome, Victorianna. We've been expecting  
you."   
  
Vicki Ann tried to free herself from Riker, but the second she moved, Deanna pressed a  
button on something on her wrist. Vicki Ann began to shake with convulsions. Then, just  
as suddenly as it started, it stopped.   
  
"Every time you try to resist us, I will activate your wrist band and what just happened  
will happen again. And each time it will get worse."   
  
"What do you want with me?" Vicki Ann asked.   
  
"You'll find out soon enough," Deanna replied.   
  
Vicki Ann found herself strapped in some sort of booth. In front of her was Deanna, Riker  
and a few other officers. Deanna pressed a button which activated the booth.   
  
"Now, we're going to ask you some questions. If you tell us what we want to know, you  
will not be harmed. If not, I will press this button and what happened in the transporter  
room, will happen again," Deanna told her. "We'll start off with an easy question. What is  
your name and rank?"   
  
Vicki Ann didn't say a word.   
  
Deanna pressed the button.   
  
Vicki Ann made fists with her hands and remained silent.   
  
"I'll give you another chance. Answer the question."   
  
Vicki Ann kept her mouth shut.   
  
Deanna pressed the button again. When Vicki Ann didn't open her mouth, Deanna said,  
"We'll try another question. What is your ship's current mission?"   
  
Vicki Ann still remained silent.   
  
And yet again, Deanna pressed the button.   
  
Vicki Ann let out no sound.   
  
Deanna grew angry. She raised the setting and pressed the button.   
  
Vicki Ann began to lose consciousness.   
  
"Get her out of there. She's of no use to me now. We'll keep her in the brig until we  
receive our directive from Q."   
  
"I would like to try and get the information out of her, "Riker replied.   
  
"Very well. Just keep her alive," Deanna replied as she walked away.   
  
Riker picked up Vicki Ann just as she lost consciousness and carried her away.   
  
Vicki Ann awoke in a set of crew quarters. Not hers, but very familiar. She was in one of  
the extra bedrooms in an officer's quarters. The room was adequately furnished, containing  
a bed, a dresser, a night table and bathroom in a small room off the one side. She was  
wearing a uniform very similar to the one Deanna had been wearing, minus the  
communicator and the skirt was much shorter, only going about six inches below the hips.  
On her feet were black, high- cut boots that went to the knee. She stood up and looked  
down at herself. "Arrgh! This is awful!"   
  
"I think it looks rather nice. It rather emphasizes your shapely figure," a voice behind her  
said.   
  
Vicki Ann spun around to see who it was, but was caught by the intruder. She looked up,  
right into the eyes of Riker. She tried to wiggle free, but this Riker was much stronger than  
her Riker. "Let me go!"   
  
"Sorry, my dear, but until Q decides what you're worth, you're mine. As a matter of fact, I  
do believe that Q will have you executed, but I'm prepared to bargain for you life."   
  
"What's in it for you?"   
  
"The company of a very beautiful woman," he replied, running his hands along the curves  
of her body.   
  
"Really?" she asked, her voice soft and raspy. "That sounds rather. . . . . ."   
  
Riker smiled when he saw her change of attitude.   
  
She finished her sentence. "Repulsive!" She rammed her heel onto his foot.   
  
He screamed and grabbed her arm as she tried to run away. He pulled her to him and  
wrapped his arms around her waist to keep her from getting away. "I wouldn't try anything  
like that again or you might find yourself staring at the barrel of a disruptor."   
  
"I would rather die than-."   
  
He turned her around to face him. "Would you?" He pulled his knife from his side. "Alright  
then." He held the knife up to her throat. "Accept my proposition or I'll slit your throat."   
  
Vicki Ann remained motionless.   
  
He pushed her across the room. She hit the wall and sunk to the floor. "I'll give you one  
more chance. I'll let you have some time to consider your decision."   
  
When Riker arrived at the bridge, he turned to one of the officers on duty and barked,  
"Find out everything about our guest. I want to know everything. If she has friends, find  
out who they are. If she has a lover, find out. Alert me when you have the information."   
  
"Found a new friend?" Troi asked, teasingly.   
  
"More like your replacement."   
  
That night, Riker returned to his quarters with an some useful information on Vicki Ann. He  
entered his quarters and then the forcefield protected room that usually held his prisoners.  
Vicki Ann was still unconscious on the floor and there was blood coming from the back of  
her head. He shook her until she woke up.   
  
She sat up and glared at him. She felt the back of her head. When she removed her hand,  
it was covered with blood.   
  
Riker handed her a med kit. "Fix it."   
  
Vicki Ann obeyed and then handed Riker the med kit.   
  
He gave it back to her. "Keep it. You'll probably need it again." He paced a bit. "Have you  
thought about my proposition?"   
  
She ignored him.   
  
He grabbed her arm and pulled her up to him. "I wouldn't play games. If you do, I can  
make life very difficult for you."   
  
"I'm shaking in my boots."   
  
He laughed. "I've seen your type before. Beautiful and strong. And stubborn as hell. They  
usually don't last longer than a few days, a week at the most. Once I start to make things  
difficult for them, they either force me to kill them or they commit suicide."   
  
"I've already been through hell. I think I can take a little more."   
  
"Really? We'll see about that."   
  
"I already told you that I would rather die than accept your proposition."   
  
"The day is young. I will be kind and give you some more time to think. In the mean time, I  
would like to ask you a question. On the planet, you seemed to sense that something was  
wrong. How?"   
  
"Magic."   
  
"Answer the question!" he roared at her.   
  
"I was fortunate enough to have had some genetic meddling done to me before my birth.  
It included advanced telepathy and empathic abilities far beyond those I originally had."  
When Riker gave her a confused look, she smiled. "That's right. I already had empathic  
abilities. But, that's all."   
  
"How?"   
  
"My father was human, but my mother was Betazoid. Sound familiar?"   
  
Just like Deanna, Riker thought to himself.   
  
"Exactly."   
  
Riker glanced at the PADD he had been given. He scrolled down the page and there it was.  
Her real name was Victorianna Troi. She had been taken from her parents before birth for  
some kind of experiment. He had missed it when he had read over it. So that means that  
she is- "Deanna's sister," he finished.   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. She hoped she could use this to her advantage. "Do you know what  
that means? It means the jig is up. I can read your mind. I know what you're planning so  
you might as well let me go. I'm of absolutely no use to you."   
  
"I wouldn't be so sure about that. As a matter of fact, this information will be very useful.  
Instead of slitting your throat, how about your sister's? Or your best friend, my alternate?"  
He saw the fear begin to show in her eyes. "Or better yet, what about your beloved  
doctor? One Julian Bashir."   
  
Vicki Ann gasped.   
  
"It would be such a shame if the doctor had an accident, wouldn't it?"   
  
"No," she whispered.   
  
"What did you say?"   
  
"No."   
  
"No? And what will you do in return for me sparing the doctor's life?"   
  
"Anything."   
  
"Anything?"   
  
She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her lips to less than an inch away from  
his and whispered, "I'll do anything you want."   
  
Picard sat on the bridge, watching the viewscreen. They had been at Time Planet for over  
a week and there was no sign of Vicki Ann. He suspected that if they didn't get any clues  
soon, Starfleet would sent them elsewhere. He glanced over at Deanna. Outwardly, she  
seemed to be taking things well, but he knew she was just putting up a front. As for Riker,  
his worry showed, despite his efforts to the contrary. He and Data were attempting to  
analyze the readings from the Guardian. Though his face was fixed with concentration, his  
eyebrows furrowed with concern. Just like the rest of the crew, he had dark circles under  
his eyes, both out of overwork and worry. The rest of the senior staff, Picard guessed,  
was the same. He hadn't seen much of Beverly lately, but with Vicki Ann gone, she was  
swamped in sickbay and that gave her an outlet for her feelings.   
  
It was amazing how the loss of one officer could throw everyone off. What was strange  
about this was that out of all of them, Vicki Ann had been with them the shortest amount  
of time. And yet, they had all become attached to and so dependant on her being there.  
She had a way of getting under skin and straight to your heart, so that you couldn't  
imagine life without her. It was that quality and the fact that they'd been through so  
much together in the time since she'd come aboard. The situaiton with the Q and most  
recently, the situation with Riker's duplicate, had brought them together so that they were  
like family.   
  
No, they were family. Vicki Ann had confided in him once that although she loved her  
adopted family and they loved her, she had always felt disconnected from them in a way.  
Like she wasn't a part of them. Therefore, he belived, she searched for a place to which  
she could beong, a place that felt like home. The Enterprise had become that place. And  
that was the reason they were still hoping, still waiting. Because you don't give up on  
family.   
  
Q stared straight ahead. He was still waiting for some sign that she was okay. Then he got  
it. He saw the prophecy before him in a jumble of images. He saw Vicki Ann and Riker, or  
someone who looked like him. He saw men in black uniforms, a man in a Starfleet uniform  
and a child. A child that shouldn't exist yet. A child that must be destroyed or he would  
destroy them all. It wasn't what he wanted, but it was enough. He snapped his fingers and  
appeared on the bridge. "She's gone."   
  
"What?" Riker asked, snapping out of his daze.   
  
"She's gone. She's not in 21st century San Francisco anymore."   
  
"Where is she then?"   
  
"I don't know."   
  
"You don't know?"   
  
"No, I don't."   
  
"I thought you knew everything," Riker snapped.   
  
"Look, Riker, just because you miss your mistress, doesn't mean that you have to take it  
out on me!"   
  
"ENOUGH!" Picard roared.   
  
The bridge crew, as well as Q, looked at him wide-eyed.   
  
"Now that I have your attention, we can't be arguing like children if we're actually going to  
get anywhere with this search."   
  
"You're not going to get anywhere," Q replied, crossing his arms across his chest,  
annoyed.   
  
"And why not?"   
  
"Because you're not supposed to? Don't you understand? We're not supposed to interfere!  
With the possible exception of one person, and for him, it wouldn't be interfering, helping  
to fulfill the prophecy."   
  
"So again, we have to sit back and do nothing?" Riker asked.   
  
"As hard as it is, yes! Do you think that I want to stand by and let this thing play out? Do  
you think that I want to see her get hurt anymore? I would love nothing more than to go  
running after her and make sure that she's protected from any further harm! But I can't do  
that and neither can you! Do you understand?"   
  
"I'm sorry, Q, but your speeches don't impress me at all. I don't believe a thing you say.  
After all you did for Vicki Ann, I still believe that you did it because you got some thing out  
of it."   
  
Picard nodded. "We understand, Q. And we promise not to interfere."   
  
"Thank you , Mon capitaine."   
  
Q went back to Vicki Ann's quarters. Had Vicki Ann not had an attachment to that  
insufferable Riker, Q might have turned him into a Betazoid flea and stepped on him. What  
was it Vicki Ann had said about the two of them? He remembered now. She'd said the  
reason they hated each other was because they were too much alike; arrogant, both  
always wanting to be in control, neither wanting to be questioned.. Q laughed to himself.  
She was right. He couldn't hide from her, not matter how hard he tried. And he loved it.   



	19. 19

Chapter 20  
  
Julian Bashir walked into the replimat. O'Brien and Ezri waved for him to join them, but he  
ignored them and headed straight for the replicator. He ordered a ratakjino. Then, he  
joined his friends.   
  
"Good morning," O'Brien said, his usual cheery self.   
  
Julian held up a hand and then drank half of his ratakjino. He closed his eyes, took a deep  
breath, opened his eyes again and then said, "Good morning," although the sentiment  
wasn't really there.   
  
"What's the matter with you?" O'Brien asked.   
  
"Tired," Julian muttered.   
  
"Can you speak in full sentences?" Ezri teased.   
  
"No," Julian replied, shaking his head.   
  
"Up late working last night?" O'Brien asked.   
  
Julian shook his head. "No, didn't sleep well."   
  
O'Brien laughed at Julian's lack of sentences and took a drink of his own coffee.   
  
Ezri frowned. "Why not?"   
  
Julian blinked and then shook his head as if to clear it. "What?" he asked, staring blankly at  
her.   
  
Ezri sighed and replied, "Why didn't you sleep well?"   
  
Julian mumbled something under his breath.   
  
"What? Speak up, Julian. I can't hear you."   
  
"Nightmares."   
  
Ezri's frown deepened and Julian swore Jadzia was sitting across from him.   
  
"Julian-"   
  
As his anger grew, so did the adrenaline rushing through his veins, which increased his  
alertness. "Look, I know what you're going to say and I don't want to hear it! I'm a grown  
man, Ezri and I can take care of myself. I don't need you to patronize me!"   
  
"I'm not trying to patronize you, I'm just trying to help."   
  
"Well, I don't need your help! I'm fine! Just because I had a nightmare doesn't mean I need  
your psychotherapy. What I need is Vicki Ann, here with me, but that's not going to  
happen, so stop worrying about it! Just let me deal with it the way I want to deal with it!"  
He stood and stormed off to the infirmary.   
  
O'Brien looked over at Ezri, who looked ready to cry. "Don't take it personally," he said,  
patting her shoulder comfortingly. "He fought me the other night over darts. He's at the  
end of his rope. He doesn't know how to deal with this. Especially after losing Jadzia. He's  
afraid he's going to lose Vicki Ann, too."   
  
"He's not the only one," Ezri replied.   
  
` Vicki Ann woke up and for a moment she forgot where she was. When she saw Riker  
sleeping beside her, she remembered. What have I sunk to? Vicki Ann thought to  
herself. Remember, you're doing this for Julian. She sat up and was about to get up, when  
she felt Riker's hand on her arm.   
  
"Where are you going?"   
  
Vicki Ann was at a loss for words. "Nowhere."   
  
"Stay here, where I can keep an eye on you."   
  
Vicki Ann made a face and laid back down and prayed that sleep would claim her so that  
she could escape this hell in her dreams.   
  
The next time Vicki Ann awoke, she was in her room, fully dressed in that horrible uniform.  
On the dresser was a plate of food and a note, which said,   
  
"Make sure you eat enough. We wouldn't want you to get sick because then you wouldn't  
be able to earn your keep. And if you should change your mind, I can always arrange for  
the doctor to have a little 'accident."   
  
Vicki Ann felt nauseous. She ran into the bathroom and threw up. She sat down on the  
bed and began to cry. "What have I done?"   
  
"How is your little friend? Is she all that you expected?"   
Troi asked Riker, smiling.   
  
"She's determined and stubborn. But it didn't take much to make her see things my way.  
Just a few threats about killing your alternate, my alternate, and most importantly, her  
beloved Bashir."   
  
"So, I take it you're having fun with her?"   
  
"Yes. She's much more fun than you."   
  
Here   
  
Before he went to bed that night, Julian read over the note Vicki Ann had left on his desk  
the day she left. It was written on actual paper. Despite the fact that paper wasn't used  
very much anymore, Vicki Ann's penmanship was beautiful. Of course.   
  
"Dear Julian,   
By the time you read this, I'll have probably already come by the infirmary and said  
goodbye. But, I thought I'd leave you a note anyway.   
  
Despite my horrible behavior, I had a wonderful time staying with you.   
It's too bad it can't be more permanent. (Breathe, Julian) It was a joke. I can't wait until  
your next shore leave. (Mine won't be for a while. I've taken too many already!!) Well, if I  
don't leave soon, they'll leave without me. I love you. I'll miss you. Love,   
Vicki Ann"   
  
He had just about memorized the entire note. In the back of his mind, he thought that  
maybe, just maybe, if he read it enough, he might convince himself that she was safe and  
sound on the Enterprise. But no matter how hard he tried to convince himself, it just  
wasn't true. Why is it that in every relationship you get into, Julian, something always  
goes wrong? If it's not irreconcilable differences, it's the fact that you're girlfriend is at  
high-risk for kidnaping. Well, I guess it's true what they say: No pain, no gain.   
  
Commander Riker walked onto the bridge. He sat down and stared at the seat in front of  
him, Vicki Ann's usual seat. Ensign Alvarez was currently operating the conn. Thank  
goodness orbits don't require swift maneuvering, Riker thought to himself.   
  
Picard noticed that Riker seemed preoccupied. "Are you all right, Number One?"   
  
Riker shook his head. "I had some strange dreams, that's all. I'm fine, though."   
  
"Perhaps you should speak to Deanna about it?"   
  
"Perhaps," Riker replied. But that was the last thing he wanted to do.   
  
Riker sat in his quarters after his shift, thinking. He couldn't forget the strange dreams he  
had had the night before. Deanna had asked him about them, but he had shrugged it off  
and said he didn't remember them. She had accepted his answer and didn't question him  
again.   
  
He had dreamt about Vicki Ann. Throughout the entire dream, he didn't hear one word of  
their conversations, but it was apparent that they were upset with each other. In the  
beginning, they were arguing. At one point, her held a knife to her throat and then he  
pushed her. She flew across the room and hit the wall. He had left her there, bleeding and  
unconscious.   
  
When he had returned, they argued again and Riker was again physically rough with her.  
He said something that upset her, but the next minute she was all over him and flirting  
aggressively, almost as if she was trying to act interested, but really wasn't. They ended  
up in bed together. Vicki Ann seemed to be very unhappy underneath and Riker seemed to  
have some kind of power over her. Riker couldn't forget the expression he had seen on his  
face when Vicki Ann had tried to leave and he had pulled her back. It was a sort of evil  
delight that made Riker sick to his stomach.   
  
He was afraid to tell Deanna about it, for fear she might read something into it. What  
really bothered Riker was the strange feeling that the dream had actually happened  
somewhere, at some time.   
  
There   
  
When Riker returned to his quarters, he went into Vicki Ann's room. She was sitting  
cross-legged on the floor, her arms crossed defiantly across her chest. He looked to the  
dresser to see if she had eaten. The food was untouched. "I thought I told you to eat."   
  
"I wasn't hungry," she replied.   
  
"Eat it now."   
  
"I'm not hungry."   
  
"Eat it!"   
  
She remained silent, but her expression clearly said that she didn't plan to eat one morsel.   
  
He grabbed her arm and pulled her up. He pointed to the tray of food and said, "You will  
eat this right now."   
  
"No."   
  
"What did you say?"   
  
"I said no."   
  
"You will not say no to me!"   
  
"Yes, I will," she screamed back, picking up the tray and throwing it across the room.   
  
Riker raised his arm and smacked her across the face. She flew across the room and hit  
her head on the night table. He pulled her away from the table and said, "You will fix any  
injuries with the med kit. Is that clear?"   
  
She nodded slowly.   
  
"And clean up this mess!" he screamed as he left the room.   
  
Vicki Ann cried as she healed her injuries. Deja-vu, she thought to herself. Only this time  
you have experienced it before.   
  
Here   
  
Commander Riker stared at the viewscreen, hoping that it would give him some insight on  
what they should tell Starfleet Command when questioned about why the entire ship  
disobeyed orders and violated the quarantine of Time Planet. So far, they had managed to  
stall for time, but they couldn't keep it up for long.   
  
Suddenly, Riker had a blinding headache. He had to shut his eyes for moment. The minute  
he shut his eyes, a flood of images flew at him. Some were from his dream the night before  
and some he had never seen before. The first image was of Vicki Ann wearing some sort of  
strange costume. It was a two piece outfit, the top was sleeveless, low-cut and left the  
midriff exposed. The skirt was very short, only going about six inches below the hips and  
was slit partway up the side.   
  
She also wore high-cut black boots that went to the knee. Riker thought he recognized  
the costume, but couldn't remember where he had seen it before.   
  
The next image was very similar to his dream in the respect that he and Vicki Ann were  
arguing and he couldn't hear what they were saying. It appeared as if Riker was trying to  
get Vicki Ann to eat some food off of a tray and she refused by throwing the tray across  
the room.   
  
Riker responded by hitting across the face, which sent her flying into the night table,  
causing even more injuries.   
  
The rest of the scenes were from his dream, except this time, he heard what they were  
saying.   
  
"I think it looks rather nice. It rather emphasizes your shapely figure."   
  
"Let me go!"   
  
"Sorry, my dear, but until Q decides what you're worth, you're mine. As a matter of fact, I  
do believe that Q will have you executed, but I'm prepared to bargain for you life."   
  
"What's in it for you?"   
  
"The company of a very beautiful woman."   
  
"Really? That sounds rather. . . . . repulsive!"   
  
"I wouldn't try anything like that again or you might find yourself staring at the barrel of a  
disruptor."   
  
"I would rather die than-."   
  
"Would you? Alright then. Accept my proposition or I'll slit your throat."   
  
"Keep it. You'll probably need it again."   
  
"I already told you that I would rather die than accept your proposition."   
  
"Instead of slitting your throat, how about your sister's? Or your best friend, my alternate?  
Or better yet, what about your beloved doctor? One Julian Bashir."   
  
"No."   
  
"No? And what will you do in return for me sparing the doctor's life?"   
  
"I'll do anything you want."   
  
"Stay here, where I can keep an eye on you."   
"I thought I told you to eat."   
  
"I'm not hungry."   
  
"You will eat this right now."   
  
"I said no."   
  
"You will not say no to me!"   
  
Suddenly, Riker understood. Of course, he passed out from the strain of it all, but he  
understood.   
  
Picard and Deanna stood over Riker. "Will, are you all right?"   
Picard asked.   
  
"Can you hear us?" Deanna asked.   
  
No reply.   
  
"Medical emergency! Dr. Crusher report to the bridge immediately!" Picard said, tapping his  
comm badge.   
  
"Diagnosis?" Picard asked.   
  
Beverly Crusher scanned Riker. "Psychic trauma."   
  
"Psychic trauma?" Deanna asked. "How?"   
  
Beverly shook her head. "I don't know. There's a lot of activity in the visual cortex. It  
appears as if he was dreaming."   
  
"While he was awake? Like daydreaming?" Deanna asked.   
  
"No. More like he was seeing something that was happening elsewhere, which is very  
strange because Will has never shown any psychic ability before," Beverly replied.   
  
Riker stirred.   
  
Beverly went over to him. "He's waking up. Will, can you hear me? It's Beverly."   
  
He forced a smiled. "I'll bet your glad to finally have me here."   
  
Beverly returned the smile. "Yes, I can finally finish your physical." She winked at Riker.  
"Just kidding. How are you feeling?"   
  
"A little groggy, but I'm okay," he replied, sitting up.   
  
"Take it easy, Will," Picard said.   
  
"With all of you here, it seems like my funeral," Riker said.   
  
Beverly smiled. "Will, do you remember what happened before you collapsed?"   
  
Riker thought for a second. His face shifted to a look of pain.   
"I saw Vicki Ann. I saw where she was and what was happening to her."   
  
"Where is she?" Deanna asked.   
  
"In the alternate timeline we encountered a few years ago,"   
Riker told her.   
  
"Which one?" Picard asked.   
  
"The one with the Imperial Starship Enterprise. It seems that they saw her in the Guardian  
and when she emerged, they kidnaped her."   
  
"Why?" Deanna asked.   
  
"Your alternate drilled her for information about us. When Vicki Ann refused, they used the  
agonizer to try and get her to talk, but she remained silent. Your alternate felt she was  
useless and gave her to my alternate as a prisoner. Apparently, it's a pastime of his to  
keep physically attractive women as his prisoners. She is his equivalent of 'the captain's  
woman,' only against her will."   
  
"Is she alright?" Picard asked.   
  
"No. She fights him and each time she does, he abuses her. Apparently, it's normal for him.  
He even gave her a med kit to heal her injuries. If a girl he fancies rejects him, he keeps  
her prisoner and threatens her until she complies. According to him, many have either  
forced him to kill them or opted for suicide."   
  
"Did he threaten to kill her and that's why she's with him?"   
Deanna asked.   
  
"He did, but that didn't change her mind. She refused him until he threatened me, Deanna  
and most importantly, Julian."   
  
"What we do for love," Picard muttered. "What we do for love."   
  



	20. 20

Chapter 21   
  
Victorianna Troi closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep. Once she was sure that Riker  
was fast asleep, she got up and ran into the other room and grabbed a hypospray. She  
programmed it for a mixture of two strong analgesics to get a nice sedative. She pressed  
it to Riker's neck. "You shouldn't have trusted me," she whispered. After she dressed, she  
grabbed the hypospray and reprogrammed it. She grabbed Riker's sidearm, knife and  
insignia as she toward the door.   
  
When she emerged from the quarters, the guard looked at her questioningly. "Where's  
Commander Riker?"   
  
"He's sleeping," she replied, sweetly. "Counselor Troi wishes for me to report early this  
morning."   
  
The guard nodded and waved her on.   
  
Julian Bashir jerked awake, covered in sweat. He had dreamt of a man holding a knife to  
Vicki Ann's throat. He had to do something. He dressed and ran out the door.   
  
Captain Benjamin Sisko awoke to the sound of his doorbell ringing. Who is the world could  
that be? he thought to himself. He got out of bed, put on his robe and walked over to the  
door and opened it. The doors opened and Julian Bashir burst in.   
  
"Doctor, what are you doing here at this hour?   
  
"I apologize for waking you captain, but I need to request a leave of absence."   
  
Sisko sighed. "Julian, I understand that you're upset about Vicki Ann's disappearance and  
that you want to everything you can to help find her, but Captain Picard is taking care of  
the situation."   
  
"I know, sir, but she's in danger."   
  
"The Q are taking care of that, remember?"   
  
"But what if someone tries to interfere with the prophecy?"   
  
"Julian, don't worry. I'm sure she's fine. Now go back to bed."   
  
Julian nodded. "Yes, sir."   
  
Ezri Dax heard her doorbell ringing. She stumbled out of bed and said, "Come in."   
  
Bashir entered.   
  
"Julian? What are you-?"   
  
He interrupted her. "Ezri, I need you to do me a favor."   
  
"What?"   
  
"I need you to cover for me if Sisko asks for me or wonders where I am. I've already found  
someone to cover for me in the infirmary, but I need you to keep him from looking for me  
for a little while. Just a few days, that's all."   
  
"Julian, why? What's-."   
  
"Vicki Ann is in danger and she needs my help. Thanks, Ezri. I owe you one," he said,  
starting to leave.   
  
"Julian, wait," Ezri replied, but he was already gone. She sighed to herself and shook her  
head. "A few days?"   
  
There   
  
Vicki Ann walked down the corridor, being careful not to be seen. The last thing she  
needed was for someone to recognize her. She turned a corner and ran into a tall man in a  
Lieutenant's uniform. Her first instinct was to apologize, but instead, she gave him a look  
as if it were his fault. "Watch where you're going." She turned to walk away, but he man  
grabbed her arm.   
  
"She'll do," he said to his companion.   
  
His companion nodded and pressed a badge on his chest. "We're ready."   
  
"How many?" came the reply.   
  
"Three." They vanished in the shimmer of a transporter beam.   
  
They reappeared on a freighter ship. A man stood a few feet away from them, talking to a  
woman with short, dark brown hair. The man was tall and thin and his dark brown hair was  
pulled back in a ponytail.   
  
He turned when he heard them.   
  
Vicki Ann bit her lip so that she wouldn't gasp. It was Julian.   
Obviously not her Julian,   
but instead, a cold, bitter Julian made so by years of pain and hardship.   
  
"Who is she?" he asked.   
  
The two men who had abducted her shrugged.   
  
Julian stepped closer to her. "What's your name and rank?"   
  
"Dr. Victorianna Troi. Rank of Commander," she replied.   
  
"You look exactly like a woman by the name of Victorianna Leonard."   
  
"That's me. I changed my name."   
  
"You're lying. Victorianna is dead," Julian said to her.   
  
"I assure you. I am Victorianna Troi."   
  
"Then you must be from the other timeline, correct?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded.   
  
Julian shook his head. "She's of no use to us."   
  
"Sir, I've been monitoring transmissions to, from and within the Enterprise. Apparently, she  
is worth something to us. Not only is she a personal prisoner of Commander Riker, but they  
are awaiting word from Q on what he wants done with her," someone sitting at a control  
station told Bashir.   
  
Bashir smiled. "Well, it looks like we've got  
someone special.   
Friend of the Commander, are we?" he asked Vicki Ann. "Perhaps they would be willing to  
bargain for you."   
  
"If you have any compassion or decency within you, you will refuse to return me to them."  
  
"Oh, you don't want to go back to the Commander?"   
  
"I would rather die here than go back," she replied, her face set with determination.   
  
"It may come to that. Unless you can give me a good reason to spare your life. If only  
there was some way you could help us. . ."   
  
"I'm Betazoid."   
  
Bashir smiled. "Well, Victorianna, it seems as if you have saved your life for the moment."  
He turned to the other men. "Make sure she doesn't go anywhere," he said, motioning to  
one of the men.   
  
The man walked over to her and put handcuffs on her arms and told her to sit down in the  
corner. Then he guarded her with a laser rifle and said, "Don't move."   
  
Vicki Ann sat in the corner of the transport ship, watching what was going on, trying to  
figure out all she could about each of them. She needed to find an ally, someone she could  
trust, so that she could get home.   
  
A woman walked in and Vicki Ann gasped. The woman noticed Vicki Ann and walked over  
to Bashir.   
  
"What's the matter with you?" he asked the woman as soon as he saw her. "You look like  
you've seen a ghost."   
  
"I have. Her," the woman replied, pointing to Vicki Ann. "What is she doing here? How did  
she get here? She's dead!"   
  
"Calm down. She's from one of the alternate timelines."   
  
"How did she get here?"   
  
"The Enterprise had her. Apparently, she's a personal friend of Commander Riker."   
  
"I see. But, won't they come looking for her?"   
  
Bashir smiled. "That's exactly what I'm hoping for."   
  
Vicki Ann hid her face behind her arms as she felt the tears begin to fall. She was tired of  
this damned prophecy. She wanted her life back. She wanted to go home; to the  
Enterprise, to Starfleet, to her family, and especially, to Julian. Someone touched her arm  
gently.   
  
Vicki Ann looked up and came face to face with this universe's version of Ezri Dax.   
  
Ezri was holding a plate of food and a glass of water for Vicki Ann. "I know it's not much  
and it's not exactly caviar, but it will keep you from getting sick. You'll need to keep your  
strength up if you're going to stay with us."   
  
Vicki Ann felt a shiver run up her spine. She remembered the last time someone told her to  
keep her strength up. But, Ezri wasn't exactly the alternate Riker. In fact, she might even  
be like her Ezri.   
  
Vicki Ann took the food from Ezri. "Thank you very much." Even though she was anything  
but hungry, Vicki Ann forced herself to eat some of the food and drink the water.   
  
"We're going to have to return her to them. We're no match for the Enterprise," the  
alternate Bashir replied.   
  
Vicki Ann looked over at him. "Please. I beg you. Do not return me to them," she pleaded.   
  
Bashir shook his head. "I'm sorry, but I have no choice."   
  
Vicki Ann looked at the guard beside her. She closed her eyes and concentrated, trying to  
push her thoughts into his mind. He turned to her and raised his disruptor. He fired.   
  
Ezri noticed this and ran at Vicki Ann just before the guard fired. She managed to knock  
both her and Vicki Ann out of the way.   
  
Bashir ran over to the guard and took the disruptor. "What the hell are you doing?"   
  
The guard looked confused. He looked at Vicki Ann and then at Bashir. "She made me do  
it."   
  
Bashir looked at Vicki Ann. "Why?"   
  
She was determined. "I will not go back there."   
  
He scrutinized her closely. "Are you really that powerful? That you can control minds?"   
  
"Only slightly. If the receivers's emotions are out of control, I can slip in and make them do  
what I want them to."   
  
"How are you able to do this?"   
  
"I was genetically enhanced by the Q."   
  
"So, we have something in common after all. The almighty doctor and the lowly rebel have  
something in common. How nice."   
  
Ezri walked over to Bashir. "We can't let them have her."   
  
"Why should I help her?" Bashir asked.   
  
"Because she was a friend of Jadzia," Ezri replied.   
  
Bashir sighed. "Very well. Get her out of her."   
  
Ezri grabbed Vicki Ann's arm and started to pull her toward the door, but Vicki Ann didn't  
move. Ezri puzzled, asked, "What's the matter? Why?" That's when she saw Commander  
Riker standing behind Vicki Ann, holding her arm and a disruptor.   
  
"Well, Victorianna, it appears as if you've made some friends,"   
Riker said.   
  
"Let her go!" Bashir shouted.   
  
Riker smiled. "It looks like Bashir has a soft spot for you in this universe, too."   
  
Vicki Ann squirmed. "Please, let me go!"   
  
"Release her or else!" Bashir shouted.   
  
Riker laughed. "Or else what? You'll shoot me with one of your disruptors? I wouldn't do  
that if I were you. The Enterprise is waiting to fire on my command."   
  
Suddenly, in the middle of the room, a vortex opened and a man emerged. He wore a  
Starfleet uniform with a blue turtleneck and two pips on his collar.   
  
Vicki Ann gasped. "Julian!" She tried to move toward him, but was halted by Riker. She  
stepped on his foot with the heel of her boot.   
  
He jumped and let go of her. She ran toward the new Bashir, but Riker managed to grab  
her again.   
  
The new Bashir got over his disorientation. "Vicki Ann!"   
  
Riker turned Vicki Ann toward him and ran the disruptor along her jaw line. "Were you  
trying to leave me?"   
  
For the first time since Julian had met her, Vicki Ann was speechless.   
  
"No. I-uh-I was just trying to-," she replied.   
  
Riker grew angry. "Don't lie to me!" He slapped her. She flew into the wall.   
  
Julian heard her tears and saw her wipe the blood from her face.   
"Stop it!" he screamed at Riker.   
  
Riker pulled Vicki Ann up to him. "Isn't this sweet? Your beloved doctor is trying to save  
you, Victorianna. Such irony." He turned to Bashir. "Don't you know, Julian, that it is you  
life that is being saved?"   
  
Julian was confused. "I don't know what you're talking about."   
  
"Of course not. Shall we tell him, Victorianna?" Riker replied.   
  
"No, please don't," Vicki Ann pleaded with him.   
  
"I disagree. I think the doctor would like to hear about your adventures since you came  
here. Where should we begin?" Riker thought for a moment. "I believe we should start at  
the part where you became my prisoner. You see, Julian, your Victorianna here refused to  
answer any questions, even in the Agony Booth. So she was given to me. She was rather  
boring, so I decided to spice things up by offering her a proposition. If she would agree to  
become my companion, I would protect her life. She refused, so I opted for another tactic.  
I threatened Riker, Deanna and then you. Once I mentioned you, her emotional control  
broke. She agreed to do anything I wanted if I promised not to kill you."   
  
"You sick bastard!" Julian interrupted.   
  
"Calm down, doctor. I must say, Julian, you are a very lucky man, or should I say were.  
Your beloved Victorianna is quite a woman,"   
Riker said, running his hands along the curves of her body. Then he ran his fingers along  
her cheek. "She's very passionate, isn't she?" he said, lifting her chin up and then turning  
to Julian.   
  
Julian looked heartbroken. He became angry. "Let her go!"   
  
Riker frowned. "I thought you'd be a little more fun with that high IQ of yours. Such a  
shame. Victorianna, I think we should be going now." He turned to notify the ship of their  
departure, when Vicki Ann grabbed his knife.   
  
She held it in front of him. "Leave me alone. Go back to your Counselor."   
  
Riker grinned at her. "You won't do it. You don't have the courage. Besides, aren't you  
forgetting something?" He pressed a button on his belt.   
  
Vicki Ann's body writhed in pain. The implant, she thought to herself. After she'd been  
taken to Riker's quarters, they given her an implant so that they could control her. She  
grabbed at her neck, as if she were trying to tear the implant out. She dropped the knife  
as she hunched over in pain.   
  
"Come on," Riker said, grabbing her arm.   
  
She looked into his eyes and whispered, "Just kill me now."   
  
Riker shook his head. "No, then I would have to kill the doctor also. Say goodbye,  
Victorianna."   
  
Vicki Ann looked at Julian, her face stained with tears. "I love you," she mouthed.   
  
"Enough!" Riker said, pulling her away. He held his knife to her neck, this time.   
  
Vicki Ann cringed as she felt the cold metal against her skin. Then, suddenly, it was gone  
and she heard the knife clatter to the floor. She turned and realized that Riker was no  
longer clutching her arm. Instead, he was lying on the floor, a knife in his back. And a  
woman was standing over him. "Deanna?" Vicki Ann whispered. "Why?"   
  
Her sister's alternate replied, "I never had a sister before."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "Thank you."   
  
"Don't thank me. Thank our father. Now get out of here." Then she and Riker disappeared.   
  
"You heard her!" the alternate Bashir barked at the helmsman, who responded by changing  
course.   
  
The full force of what had happened hit Vicki Ann and she collapsed to the floor.   
  
Julian ran over to her. "Are you all right?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I will be." She smiled at him. "My knight in shining armor."   
  
Julian returned the smile. "I should say that about you. Are you crazy? What were you  
thinking doing all that for me?"   
  
"Julian-."   
  
"Vicki Ann, I would have rather have had him kill me than for you to go through all of that."  
  
"Julian, it wouldn't have mattered. My life would have meant nothing without you."   
  
Julian laughed. "You're a hopeless romantic!"   
  
"And you're not?"   
  
"Sshh! I'm in disguise. I'm supposed to be the brave white knight who comes to save the  
damsel in distress."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "Let's agree to disagree."   
  
Julian nodded. "Now, let's get you cleaned up." He turned to Ezri. "Do you have a med kit?"  
  
Ezri nodded an ran to get one. When she returned, she handed it to Julian.   
  
Julian fixed Vicki Ann's wounds. "What am I going to do with you, Vicki Ann? You're  
constantly getting yourself into trouble and having to go to sickbay or the infirmary. You're  
nothing but trouble."   
  
She smiled. "You know I just do it so that I can see my wonderful doctor. I don't know  
what you should do. Throw me in the brig, I suppose."   
  
Julian shook his head as he ran an instrument across the gash on her cheek. "That doesn't  
say much about Doctor Crusher. I can't throw you in the brig. I'd miss you too much."   
  
"Guess you're stuck with me."   
  
"Seems like it."   
  
The alternate Bashir rolled his eyes at Ezri.   
  
Ezri smiled at him. "You're just jealous."   
  
Julian scanned Vicki Ann with the tricorder again. "I'm going to try and disable the implant."  
His fingers danced on the tricorder. "Got it! There, how's that?"   
  
She heaved a sigh of relief. "Better."   
  
Julian looked at Ezri. "Can you help us get home?"   
  
Ezri glanced at the alternate Bashir. "I-uh-well, I-."   
  
The alternate Bashir interrupted, "Yes, we'll take you to Time Planet."   
  
Vicki Ann turned to him and smiled. "Thank you."   



	21. 21

Chapter 22  
  
On the alternate Enterprise, Dr. Crusher was fixing Commander Riker's stab wound. "What  
happened?" Picard asked Troi.   
  
"I had just arrived as backup when one of the rebels ran up behind him and stabbed him.  
We were outnumbered, so I left."   
  
"Are you sure that's exactly what happened?" he asked her suspiciously.   
  
Troi remained calm. "Yes."   
  
"Sir, the Enterprise is matching our course to Time Planet. They're onto us," the helmsman  
told the alternate Bashir.   
  
"Damn. We've got to figure out a way to get them out of here. Keep intercepting those  
messages," Bashir ordered.   
  
Julian and Vicki Ann sat in the corner, where Julian was scanning her with a tricorder.  
"Your nervous system is completely fried. You're lucky you're still conscious."   
  
Vicki Ann tapped the side of her head. "My mind is as tough as they come."   
  
"Your brain, maybe, but you know as well as I do that you can break."   
  
"Don't remind me."   
  
Julian sighed. "Vicki Ann, are you ever going to tell me what happened?"   
  
"Do I have to?"   
  
"If you ever want to see me again after we get home, yes."   
  
"I hate when you play dirty. Well, let's see. They were waiting for me to come out of the  
Guardian. Riker beamed down and pretended he was Will. Once I was on board, they took  
me to the Agony Booth and drilled me for information. When I didn't tell them anything, the  
other Deanna was ready to kill me, but Riker took a liking to me. Apparently, instead of  
collecting fireflies in a jar, he collects women.   
  
He keeps them in a small room in his quarters and beats them when they don't comply with  
his wishes. I they continue to refuse, he kills them.   
  
I refused him at first, but for some reason, he didn't want to kill me, or maybe he couldn't.  
He gave me multiple chances to reconsider. Then, he threatened Will, Deanna and then  
you. He said that if I didn't listen, you would have and accident. I refused, so he asked me  
what I would do to keep you alive. I told him that I would do anything. I managed to  
escape one morning while he was sleeping. I nailed him with a hypospray and pretended to  
be one of Deanna's security people. Then, I was kidnaped by two rebels. I'm here, I'm fine,  
end of story."   
  
"Vicki Ann, you've been through hell ten times over, so don't even tell me that you're fine.  
I know better."   
  
"Julian-."   
  
"Don't 'Julian' me! I'm tired of you pretending everything is fine when you're ready to  
scream.. I'm not going to run to Starfleet or your parents and tell them that all your  
Betazoid training went to waste and you lost control. You're not Vulcan, Vicki Ann. You  
can express your emotions and no one will hold it against you."   
  
She looked up at him, her face wet with tears.   
  
Julian put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her to him. He wrapped his arms around  
her as she cried on his shoulder.   
  
"Oh, Julian, it was terrible. He was so horrible. He made my stomach turn. Every time he  
touched me, I felt sick. I hated myself for betraying you, but at the same time, I knew  
that I had to do it to save you. Julian, I'm so sorry."   
  
Julian rubbed her back with his arm soothingly. "Sshh. It's all right, Vicki Ann. We'll get  
through this."   
  
Vicki Ann and Julian stepped through the Guardian. When they reached the other side,  
they were on Deep Space Nine. Ezri ran up to them and embraced them both.   
  
"Thank goodness you two are all right!" She turned to Julian. "Captain Sisko is going to  
want to speak with you."   
  
Julian nodded. "I suspected as much.."   
  
Vicki Ann glanced at him. "Julian Bashir, what did you do?"   
  
"I went after you without his permission."   
  
"Julian!"   
  
"Don't say it, Vicki Ann! Would you rather be stuck in that other universe?"   
  
"No, but-."   
  
"Then, keep your mouth shut."   
  
"How would I feel about Vicki Ann- I mean, Dr. Troi joining my staff? That would be  
wonder-." Julian stopped, quickly composed himself, while straightening his uniform. "I  
mean- that would be fine."   
  
Sisko held back a smile. "I didn't think it would be a problem.   
The two of you work well together and manage to maintain a professional relationship  
while on duty. I just need to ask her."   
  
"Well, I'm sure she'll agree."   
  
"I know, Julian, but I need to ask her personally. You may go and I'll speak to her."   
  
Julian nodded. "Yes, sir."   
  
Sisko tapped his comm badge. "Sisko to Dr. Troi. Please report to my office."   
  
Vicki Ann was stunned. She knew that Starfleet wanted more doctors put on Julian's staff  
since they were so near the wormhole, but she never imagined Sisko would ask her. It was  
tempting, but she wanted to think about it. "Could I think about it and get back to you?"   
  
Sisko nodded. "Under one condition. You assist in the infirmary until you make up your  
mind."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "That's fine. Is that all?"   
  
"Yes, you may go."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded and left.   
  
Vicki Ann walked into Quark's and walked over to where Ezri was sitting at the bar.  
"Tarkalian tea," she told Quark.   
  
"Are you all right? You don't look so good," Ezri asked her.   
  
Vicki Ann sighed. "Captain Sisko asked me to join Julian's staff."   
  
"That's wonderful!" Ezri exclaimed. When she saw the lack of excitement on her friend's  
face, she added, "Isn't it?"'   
  
"I guess so."   
  
"Why the lack of enthusiasm?"   
  
"I don't know. I suppose I don't want to leave the Enterprise."   
  
"Are you sure that's it?"   
  
Vicki Ann looked at Ezri accusingly. "What's that supposed to mean?"   
  
"Are you sure it doesn't have anything to do with Julian?"   
  
"Like what?"   
  
"Fear of commitment, maybe?"   
  
"Don't be ridiculous!"   
  
"It was just a suggestion."   
  
Vicki Ann sighed. "Maybe it does. After all, look at my track record. I keep making the  
same mistakes over and over again, no matter how hard I try to avoid them."   
  
"Are you saying that your relationship with Julian is a mistake?"   
  
"I don't know."   
  
"But Julian isn't abusive, controlling or in love with someone else."   
  
"I know, but. . ."   
  
"But what?"   
  
"I just have a feeling that it's not meant to be for us." Vicki Ann sighed and ran her fingers  
through her hair nervously. "I don't know what to do, Ezri."   
  
Ezri put he arm on Vicki Ann's shoulder. "I think you need to talk with Julian about this."   
  
Vicki Ann looked at Ezri. "You're right."   
  
"Julian, we need to talk."   
  
Julian had come back to his quarters after his shift in the infirmary and found Vicki Ann  
sitting on the couch in the dark. After turning the lights on, he walked over and sat down  
beside her. "Are you all right? What's wrong?"   
  
"I said, we need to talk."   
  
"Fine. Let's talk."   
  
"Captain Sisko asked me today if I wanted to join your staff. I told him I needed to think  
about it."   
  
"What's there to think about?" Julian interrupted.   
  
"There's a lot to think about, Julian!"   
  
"Like what?"   
  
"Us, for instance!"   
  
"What about us?"   
  
"My moving onto the station would be a big step for us. A step I'm not sure we're ready  
for."   
  
"What are you talking about?"   
  
"Julian, I think we need to spend some time apart to figure out our feelings and determine  
whether we're ready for this."   
  
"Why, Vicki Ann?"   
  
"To make sure that we're not making a mistake." Vicki Ann stood and grabbed her suitcase  
off the bed. "I've arranged for separate quarters."   
  
"It's nice to know you consulted me before making this decision," Julian replied, bitterly.   
  
"I'm sorry, Julian, but we need to do this."   
  
"Fine. If you feel that we need to do this, then so be it."   
  
"You don't know how happy we are to see you," Deanna told Vicki Ann.   
  
"You don't know how many times I've heard that in the past few days. I'm so glad that the  
Enterprise is staying for a while. Captain Sisko asked me to work in the infirmary until I  
make up my mind and I would rather not take time away from the Enterprise."   
  
"Have you spoken to Julian lately?" Riker asked.   
  
"No, I haven't. I've been working the night shift. I haven't even run into him yet."   
  
Deanna stood. "I'm getting a drink." She went over to the bar.   
She noticed Julian sitting beside her. "Hello, Julian. How are you doing?"   
  
Julian smiled. "I'm all right. I have to admit, I'm not exactly happy with Vicki Ann's decision,  
but I'm living with it."   
  
Deanna frowned. "Julian, I really don't believe you're going to leave it at that. You're not  
going to let the woman you think you love walk out of you life."   
  
"You don't think I love her, do you?"   
  
"I don't know what you want and I don't think that you do, either. I do think that you  
need to do some serious soul searching so that you can figure it out."   
  
"How do I do that?"   
  
"I'd tell you to take a vacation, but considering the war, you're going to have to figure it  
out for yourself. I can help you out, though. Here's a few hints. Try to avoid Vicki Ann and  
hide anything in your quarters that reminds her. Spend some time alone. Maybe spend  
some time in the Holosuites. A hike is usually good for serious thinking. In fact, any  
physical exercise is good because it relieves stress and clears the mind."   
  
"Anything else?"   
  
"Meditation is good. And if during this whole process, you'd like to talk with me to sort out  
your thoughts, you can contact me. But you must understand, Julian, this is on a strictly  
professional basis. I can't say anything about Vicki Ann and what she has said or is feeling  
or anything like that."   
  
"I understand. Thank you very much, Deanna. Now, I think I'm going to take your advice.  
I'm going for a hike."   
  
"Sounds like a good idea, Julian."   
  
Julian Bashir wiped the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. He realized that he  
was out of breath. He sat down on a rock near the edge of the cliff and took a bottle of  
water out of his backpack. The sun was setting over the ocean below. He was on top of  
the rocky cliffs on the shore. The golden rays of the sun stretched across the  
jade-colored water. Deanna was right. His head was totally clear. He stared at the sunset  
for a few minutes. Then, he said to himself, "Okay, Julian. Time to get going." He stood  
and reached for his backpack. It was caught on the edge of the rock. He tugged a little  
harder. The backpack came loose, but he lost his balance. Julian screamed as he fell back  
over the edge of the cliff. He managed to grab the edge, but the piece he held onto began  
to crumble under his weight. As he fell to the now-black water below, his scream echoed  
across the cliffs.   
  
Julian walked out of the Holosuite, soaking wet and his clothes covered in blood. "What  
happened to you?" Quark asked.   
  
"I fell."   
  
"Off a cliff?"   
  
"Yes. Now, if you don't mind, I think I'm going to go to the infirmary."   
  
"Good idea."   
  
Julian ignored all the stares and walked to the infirmary. As he neared his destination, out  
of the corner of his eye, he saw Vicki Ann sitting with Riker at the replimat. She saw him  
and started to look away, but his appearance caught her attention. She stared at him as  
he walked to the infirmary, her mouth open in shock. As he sat down on a biobed and fixed  
his wounds, Deanna entered and came over to him.   
  
"Are you alright?" she asked, concerned.   
  
Julian laughed. "I just had a little accident in the Holosuite."   
  
"Little? How's your thinking coming? Any progress?"   
  
"The hike cleared my head. Until I fell off the cliff."   
  
"You fell off a cliff? You're lucky you were able to walk in here."   
  
"I landed in the ocean. I'm a pretty good swimmer."   
  
"Good thing."   
  
"Excuse me," someone said beside them.   
  
Julian looked up and saw a man standing behind Deanna. The man was tall and was  
wearing a Starfleet uniform with a red turtleneck and three pips on his collar. Julian smiled.  
"I'm Dr. Bashir, how may I help you?"   
  
The man returned the smile and reached out to shake Julian's hand. "Hello. I'm Commander  
Alexander from the Goddard. I'm looking for Dr. Troi. I was told she was temporarily  
assigned here." As soon as he'd mentioned Dr. Troi, Bashir's eyes narrowed and the doctor  
looked him over. He began to feel uncomfortable. Finally, Bashir answered his question.   
  
"She's not on duty at the moment. I believe she's at the replimat," Bashir replied.   
  
Alexander nodded. "Thanks."   
  
Deanna smiled at him as the man left. Then she turned to Julian. "Your mind is real clear,  
Julian."   
  
"What?"   
  
"You should have seen the look you gave him when he mentioned Vicki Ann. If I were you,  
I'd take a break. Maybe go back to the Holosuite to clear your mind again."   
  
Julian sighed. "You're right. But, I think I need to get cleaned up first."   



	22. 22

Chapter 23   
  
Commander David Alexander walked onto the Promenade of Deep Space Nine. He'd heard  
about all the interesting shops and restaurants, so he took his time. He strolled around,  
pausing to look at the shops' displays. He reached the replimat and saw a familiar face. Dr.  
Bashir had been right. He felt himself gasp for breath when he saw her. She was even  
more beautiful than he remembered. She'd been promoted; she now had three pips on her  
blue collar. She looked so formal in her uniform with the sides of her hair pulled back in a  
clip. Her face gave her away, though. She was smiling and her sapphire eyes were  
sparkling.   
  
He remembered the last time he had seen her. It had been years ago. They had parted as  
friends, although it was a name only title. Things had been strained for them after she  
announced she was transferring. They had fought and ended her things after he had  
accused her of running away from their relationship. He had apologized and she had  
forgiven him, but things between them had already been over.   
  
He took a deep breath and began to walk over to her. What the hell? Might as well say  
hello. He hoped she wasn't dating the man she was sitting with. He like to try again with  
her. If she'd let him, that is.   
  
"Ace!" Alexander yelled across the replimat.   
  
Vicki Ann looked up and a smiled formed across her face. She stood and met her friend as  
he approached the table. "David! What are you doing here?" she said, giving him a hug.   
  
"Didn't you hear? The Goddard is here for some quick repairs,"   
Alexander replied.   
  
Vicki Ann noticed that Riker was giving her a strange look, so she broke her embrace with  
David and turned to Riker. "David, this is Commander William T. Riker, of the Enterprise.  
Will, this is Commander David Alexander."   
  
Riker stood and stuck out his hand. "Pleased to meet you."   
  
Alexander shook Riker's hand and replied, "Same here."   
  
Vicki Ann grabbed a chair from a nearby table. "Please join us, David."   
  
Alexander sat in the chair Vicki Ann had pulled beside her.   
  
"Why did you call her Ace?" Riker asked, confused.   
  
Vicki Ann and Alexander laughed.   
  
"That's what we started to call her after her swift maneuvering during the Klingon Civil  
War," Alexander replied. He turned to Vicki Ann. "I almost didn't find you."   
  
"What do you mean?"   
  
"I went to the infirmary and got a rather nasty look from Dr. Bashir when I asked where  
you were."   
  
Vicki Ann rolled her eyes. "Oh, that's just Julian. We were involved and had a rather bad  
breakup. He's still a little bitter."   
  
"A little?" Riker echoed.   
  
Vicki Ann kicked him under the table. "Speak of the devil," she whispered.   
  
Riker and Alexander turned to see Julian walking towards the replimat. He hadn't spotted  
them yet because his expression was neutral.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled to herself as she reached over and put her hand on David's arm to get his  
attention. "So how are things with you, David?"   
  
He turned to her and smiled. "Great. By the way, congratulations on your promotion."   
  
"Thanks," Vicki Ann said, her smile widening. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed that  
Julian had just spotted them and was watching them closely. "David, do you remember  
prank we pulled on Commander Richards?"   
  
David laughed. "Yes. I'll never forget the look on his face when he asked you to turn on  
the viewscreen and what came on but-."   
  
"A video of him singing to himself in the mirror!" Vicki Ann finished. The two of them began  
laughing hysterically. Vicki Ann then felt a hint of anger brush her barriers. She looked up  
to see Julian stomping off.   
  
Alexander stood. "I'll be right back. I'm going to get a drink. Would either of you like  
anything?"   
  
"No thanks," Vicki Ann said.   
  
Riker shook his head. As soon as Alexander was out of earshot, Riker leaned toward Vicki  
Ann and said, "I saw what you did. You are absolutely vicious."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I know. It was just my first reaction."   
  
"I think you need to suppress your first reactions."   
  
"What are you talking about?"   
  
"That's what you said to me when you hit me."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "I remember. You weren't expecting me to hit you."   
  
"Definitely not. Stop changing the subject. How can Julian figure out his feelings for you if  
you are deliberately making him jealous?"   
  
Vicki Ann made a face. "Maybe you're right."   
  
"Hey, Quark. Any Holosuites free?"   
  
"You're in luck. Someone canceled on me. It'll be free in about fifteen minutes. I've got a  
new spy program for you. There's one glitch though. The villain looks a little like Dr. Troi,"  
Quark replied.   
  
Julian shrugged. Oh, well. "No problem." Maybe that'll give me a little more motivation to  
defeat her.   
  
Vicki Ann swirled the ice in her drink absentmindedly. She heard someone come up behind  
her and she turned around. It was Quark.   
  
"Anything else, doctor?"   
  
"No, not at the moment."   
  
Quark smiled. "You look like you could use some time in the Holosuite. I just got in this  
excellent spy program and I had a cancellation."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "I'm not the spy type, but thanks anyway, Quark."   
  
"I wasn't thinking of you as the spy. You'd be absolutely perfect for the villain."   
  
"I would?"   
  
"Yes. There's one problem, though. Since the spy program this was modeled after was  
designed by Dr. Bashir, the computer has created the hero in his likeness."   
  
Vicki Ann thought about it. What the hell. Maybe I'll be more motivated to defeat him if  
he looks like Julian. "Sounds good," she replied.   
  
"Good. It'll be free in about twenty minutes."   
  
Julian walked into the Holosuite and smiled. It was nice to indulge in a fantasy totally  
unconnected with your life. He was given his assignment. Apparently, someone had  
reported that a notorious jewel thief was planning to steal the Hope Diamond from the  
Smithsonian in Washington D.C. Her name was Madeline Madison. She was the owner of a  
large jewelry store chain and also a collector of very expensive jewels. The museum was  
having a party to commemorate the anniversary of the beginning of the diamond's exhibit.  
Madison was sure to be there. He made his way through the crowd of people, looking and  
listening for anything important. Up ahead, there was a large group of people surrounding a  
woman in a red dress. As the laughter of the crowd died, a man beside the woman said,  
"Miss Madison, you really are a treat."   
  
Madison turned and smiled at the man.   
  
Julian swallowed. Okay, so maybe this fantasy isn't totally unconnected with my life. Boy,  
was Quark was a little off when he said she looked a little like Vicki Ann. She could be Vicki  
Ann's twin! He straightened his jacket and went over to her. "Miss Madison," he said.   
  
"It's a pleasure to have you with us this evening. I'm Richard Davidson, the director of the  
museum." He stuck out his hand for her to shake.   
  
Madison turned and almost choked on her champagne.   
  
Quark wasn't lying when he said the spy looked like Julian.   
She quickly composed herself and was glad to see that the 'hologram' Julian didn't notice  
her surprise. She shook his hand and smiled. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. Davidson," she  
purred. "I wouldn't miss this for the world. It's just too bad that I can't have it as part of  
my collection." When Julian gave her a bit of a strange look, she added, "Just a joke, Mr.  
Davidson."   
  
"Of course, Miss Madison," Julian replied. "Of course."   
  
"Besides, the wonderful new security system you installed with my donation would prevent  
anyone from getting anywhere near the diamond."   
  
Julian nodded. "Of course. We couldn't have done it without your generous donation."   
  
"Don't forget the arrangements you made with your friend at the security system  
company," a man said beside her. "Without your help, we wouldn't have been able to  
afford such a high-tech system."   
  
Madison blushed slightly. "That was nothing, Mr. Walton. I'm always willing to help."   
  
Julian nodded. And I'll bet you're going to help yourself to the diamond while you're at it.  
  
"Miss Madison, I'd like to speak to you about your donation,"   
Julian said to Madison as the party was wrapping up. He was hoping that he would be able  
trick her into spending some time with him so that he could get the information he needed.  
  
"Of course. Call my secretary and she'll set up an appointment," Madison replied.   
  
"I'll be going away on an appraisal trip for the museum. I'm leaving two days from now.  
Unfortunately, I'm booked until then. Would you be free now?"   
  
Vicki Ann considered the thought. This might be interesting. "Of course. We could go to  
my apartment for a drink."   
  
"That'll be fine."   
  
"What's your poison, Mr. Davidson?"   
  
"A martini, please," Julian replied.   
  
"Two martinis, please," Madison told her assistant.   
  
Julian smiled to himself. Worse comes to worse, I could get her drunk. "Thank you,"  
Julian said, as he took his drink.   
  
"Now, Mr. Davidson, what did you want to speak to me about?"   
  
"Your donation. We would like to put a plaque up describing your donation. Is that all  
right? Or would you wish to remain anonymous?"   
  
"No, that's fine. Is that all you wanted to know?"   
  
Julian thought for a minute. He pretended to be taken back. "Well, that's not the only  
thing. I have to admit, Miss Madison, that I find you to be a very interesting woman. This  
donation business was just an excuse to spend some time with you."   
  
Vicki Ann remembered what Quark had said. He had suggested that she seduce the spy,  
drug him and then get away. That might work, she thought to herself. "Well," she purred,  
as she ran her fingers through the ends of his hair. "I have to admit that I feel the same  
way."   
  
Julian laughed to himself. He'd thought that his charm would win her over. "You know, I  
probably should get back to the museum. As you know, they're installing the new security  
system tonight and I would like to make sure things are all right."   
  
"Don't forget, my friend is taking care of things. I'm sure they won't need you until  
morning," she replied.   
  
Julian knew he had to get out of there soon, or he wouldn't be able to stop her. She  
wasn't giving him any information. Her people are probably 'taking care' of things as we  
speak. He was in over his head. If he stayed, she would succeed in seducing him and he  
wouldn't be able to complete his assignment. But. . . I can always stop her in the morning.  
Vicki Ann would kill him if she knew about this. But that's what's wonderful about it, she'll  
never find out, Julian thought to himself as he drew Madison towards him in a kiss.   
  
Vicki Ann laughed to herself as 'Davidson' a.k.a. Agent Bashir, unzipped the back of her  
dress. Julian would have an absolute fit if he knew about this! She knew she shouldn't be  
doing this. What the hell, Vicki Ann thought to herself. Might as well take a risk. Besides,  
no one will ever find out.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled to herself as she reached into the bedside drawer and pulled out a pair of  
shiny, new handcuffs. She felt 'Agent Bashir' stir beside her. The sedative she had slipped  
in his drink had acted remarkably fast, once it absorbed into his system. She rolled over  
and began to pull his arms up behind the bedpost.   
  
He opened his eyes slightly. "What are you doing?" he asked her, his voice slurred.   
  
She smiled almost wickedly at him. "We're going to play a game."   
  
Agent Bashir smiled slightly, his eyes closed.   
  
Laughing, Vicki Ann got up and dressed.   
  
Julian opened his eyes. They felt very heavy. He tried to move, but found his hands were  
bound somehow. He forced himself to be alert and looked up to see his hands were  
handcuffed. He looked around and saw Madison, across the room, fully dressed, placing a  
gun under her jacket. "What are you doing? You won't get away with this! The museum  
will wonder when I don't show up for work. Everyone saw us together at the party and the  
first person they'll look for is you," he told her.   
  
Madison smiled. "Oh, I'm not worried about that. A friend of mine is taking care of  
everything. I believe you know him. His name is Falcon."   
  
"Falcon," Julian whispered. It was all a trick to get me, he thought to himself. Boy, Julian,  
did you screw up this time!   
  
"In the meantime," she said sweetly, as she began to walk over to him.   
  
When she got to the bed, she leaned down, making sure her hand was on her gun, and  
kissed him. Julian felt his head begin to swim. He was so stupid to let this woman defeat  
him just because she looked, and kissed, like Vicki Ann. Damn you, Quark!   
  
She smiled at him and whispered, "I hope you enjoyed my little game, Agent Bashir." She  
stood. "Now, I must be going. Please enjoy your stay," she said as she shut the door  
behind her. As she walked away, she could her him screaming through the door.   
  
Vicki Ann laughed her way down the steps from the Holosuites. As she walked past Quark,  
he asked her, "How did you like the program?"   
  
Vicki Ann smiled. "It was. . . interesting." She saw Riker sitting at a nearby table, so she  
joined him.   
  
When he saw her smile, he asked, "Have fun?"   
  
"As a matter of fact, I did."   
  
"Well, aren't you going to tell me about it?"   
  
"I was Madeline Madison, a notorious jewel thief pretending to steal the Hope Diamond to  
catch a secret agent."   
  
"How did you catch him?"   
  
"I took him to my apartment for a drink, drugged and seduced him. Once the drug took  
effect, I handcuffed him to the bed and left."   
  
Riker laughed. "Interesting. I never knew you could be so devious."   
  
Vicki Ann laughed. "Neither did I."   
  



	23. 23

Chapter 24   
  
Julian whistled to himself as he entered his quarters. "Computer, has Dr. Troi returned to  
the station yet?"   
  
"Dr. Troi has not returned to the station," was the reply.   
  
Good, Julian thought to himself. That meant that he had some time to get things ready  
before she got back. If he could just stay awake.   
  
"Vicki Ann!" Ezri Dax yelled as Vicki Ann walked by Quarks. "Welcome back."   
  
"I was only gone for a day," Vicki Ann replied.   
  
Ezri nodded. Julian had asked her to keep Vicki Ann busy until 1900 hours. It was 1830. "I  
know, but since you've been working the night shift, I haven't seen much of you."   
  
"You're not the only one," Vicki Ann muttered.   
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"   
  
"Well, I haven't spent any time with Julian lately, except for meals. And since I have  
tonight off, I wanted to spend it with him."   
  
"Well, he's busy in the infirmary right now and he asked not to be disturbed. He told me to  
keep you occupied until he was finished."   
  
"Really? What's he working on?"   
  
"I don't know. He didn't say. Come on, let's go play a game of darts."   
  
"Ezri, I'm an absolute mess. I think I'm going to go back to my quarters and take a shower  
before Julian's done in the infirmary. If you see him, tell him to come by my quarters when  
he's finished."   
  
Ezri smiled. That takes care of that. "Alright, I'll tell him."   
  
Vicki Ann slipped into her bathrobe and walked out into the living room. A nice cup of tea  
sounds good, she thought to herself. She got her tea and went over and sat down on the  
bed. On her night table was a single red rose and a folded piece of paper. Smiling, she  
opened the paper.   
  
"Vicki Ann,   
Meet me in my quarters at 1900 hours.   
Julian"   
  
Vicki Ann rang the chime for Julian's quarters. She'd decided on the short, red dress she'd  
worn when she and Julian had gone to Vic's for the first time. The doors opened and  
revealed Julian, wearing a crisp, ivory-colored silk shirt and tight black pants. He waved for  
her to enter. As she did, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. "I love you  
in this color," she said, fingering the material of his shirt.   
  
"And I love you in that dress," Julian replied.   
  
"I thought you would. So, what do you have planned for my only night off?"   
  
Julian pointed to the dining room. "Oh. Nothing special. Just a nice candlelight dinner for  
two. A little music. That's all."   
  
Vicki Ann and Julian sat on the couch. The were finishing the champagne left from dinner  
and Vicki Ann was telling him about her adventure with the children.   
  
"I'll bet you're exhausted," Julian replied.   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "I am, but I'm determined to stay awake and spend some time with you.  
It's going to be a while until I have another night off."   
  
Julian nodded. "That's true. But, it wouldn't hurt you to relax for a little while. I wouldn't  
be disappointed by a nice quiet evening just sitting here with you."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled and slipped off her shoes. "That does sound nice, but I'm sure we can find  
other things to occupy the time," she said as she curled up beside Julian on the couch.  
She laid her head on his shoulder. "What happened in the infirmary today?" Vicki Ann  
asked.   
  
Julian began to tell her about the equipment malfunctions. A few minutes later, he turned  
to her to ask her opinion about something.   
  
He smiled when he saw that she was fast asleep. Julian picked her up, carried her into the  
bedroom, and fell asleep beside her.   
  
A few days later, Vicki Ann walked past Ops to Captain Sisko's office. She waved at Kira  
and O'Brien and then entered the office. Sisko smiled at her from behind his desk. "You  
wanted to speak to me?"   
  
Sisko motioned to the chair in front of him. "Sit down." When Vicki Ann obeyed, he  
continued. "How are you enjoying your work in the infirmary?"   
  
Vicki Ann practically beamed. She loved working in medicine again. "It's wonderful. It's so  
different from starship medicine, even from my work on the Goddard. Of course, I've been  
working a lot of night shifts and those usually aren't too exciting."   
Sisko nodded. "I can imagine. Although I'm sure Dr. Bashir would have a few stories about  
exciting night shifts."   
  
Vicki Ann smiled and nodded.   
  
"The reason I asked you here was because Starfleet has asked me if I have added any  
doctors to Julian's staff yet. In order to answer them, I need to ask you whether you've  
decided to take the position."   
  
Intense fear filled Vicki Ann. She could feel her pulse racing, the adrenaline pumping, her  
body ready to run. But why? she asked herself. I can't possibly be afraid of Julian.  
That's absolutely ridiculous! Julian is the sweetest, most gentle, most compassionate  
person I've ever met. How can I be afraid of him? But I am. I'm afraid of staying here on  
the station with him, permanently. Permanently. Maybe that's what I'm afraid of. She  
remembered Sisko.   
  
I can't answer him right now. I don't know what I want.   
  
"Doctor, are you all right?" Sisko asked her, obviously concerned.   
  
Vicki Ann took the chance to leave. "I'm not feeling very well."   
  
Sisko stood. "Perhaps you should go to the infirmary."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "That's a good idea," she said, weakly.   
  
"Would you like me to walk you there?"   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "No! No, I mean you're a very busy man. I'll be fine." She stood  
and started for the door.   
  
Sisko, confused, shook his head. "Alright, if you insist. Come see me when you're feeling  
better and we'll talk about the position."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. As she left, her mind started racing again. She began to feel as if she  
couldn't breathe. She ignored Kira and O'Brien this time and sprinted away from there. As  
Vicki Ann ran by the infirmary, she noticed that Julian was there. Thank God. I couldn't  
possibly deal with him right now. She continued running, right past a surprised Odo, until  
she bumped into Ezri. "I'm sorry, Ezri. I'm just in a bit of a hurry."   
  
Ezri laughed. "I can see that. Why are you in such a hurry?"   
  
Vicki Ann searched her mind for an excuse. "Dr. Crusher needed some information from my  
computer for a meeting today and I completely forgot. I'm on my way to send it right  
now."   
  
Ezri nodded. "Well, you'd better go before it's too late."   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "See you later," she said, waving, as she sprinted to the habitat ring.   
  
Ezri shook her head as her friend ran away. Something wasn't right about her. She looked  
almost frightened. Ezri shook her head. She's probably just upset that she forgot about  
the information Dr. Crusher needed. Ezri pushed the thoughts into the back of her mind  
and went on her way.   
  
Vicki Ann closed the door to Julian's quarters behind her and leaned against the wall. She  
let out a long, slow, sigh. She slid down the wall to the floor and put her face in her  
hands. What am I going to do?   
  
Julian Bashir saved his medical log and leaned back in his chair, smiling. He had finished all  
of his work for the day and no one was there, except for his staff. He was considering  
leaving early to spend some time with Vicki Ann before her shift. His thoughts were  
interrupted by a familiar voice.   
  
"Julian?"   
  
He looked up. O'Brien was standing in front of him. Julian smiled. "Hello, Chief. What can I  
do for you?"   
  
O'Brien laughed. "You don't have to sound so formal. I was just wondering if you were free  
for dinner tonight."   
  
"Actually, I was thinking of leaving here a little early to spend some time with Vicki Ann  
before her shift."   
  
O'Brien nodded. "How is she feeling?"   
  
Julian looked confused. "What do you mean?"   
  
"Well, she had a meeting with the captain today and she looked kind of upset when she  
left."   
  
Julian shook his head. "I don't know. I haven't seen her since breakfast this morning."   
  
O'Brien nodded. "Oh. Well, tell her hello. I'll see you later, Julian," he said before he left.   
  
"I'll tell her," Julian called after his friend. He shook his head. I wonder what's going on and  
why she never said anything to me. You would have thought that if something was wrong,  
she would've come to me. Unless. . . . it had something to do with me. Maybe I'd better  
go speak to the captain.   
  
The door chimed in Captain Sisko's office. He told the person to come in and the doors  
opened revealing Dr. Bashir. Sisko stood and walked over to him. "Hello, doctor," he said to  
Julian. "How is Vicki Ann feeling?"   
  
Julian looked confused. "What?"   
  
"She became ill while she was in my office today. She said she was going to the infirmary.  
Don't tell me she never showed up."   
  
Julian shook his head. "No, she didn't."   
  
Sisko, looking worried asked, "I hopes she's alright. You don't think she passed out  
somewhere or something, do you?"   
  
Julian shook his head and replied dryly, "No, I'm sure she's just fine." He took the sarcasm  
out of his voice and asked, "May I ask what the two of you were discussing?"   
  
Sisko nodded. "I was just asking her if she had decided whether to take the job on your  
staff."   
  
"What did she say?" Julian asked, although he had a feeling he already knew the answer.   
  
"She became ill before she answered," Sisko replied.   
  
"So I thought," Julian muttered.   
  
"What did you say?" Sisko asked.   
  
Julian shook his head. "Nothing," he replied. "I was just thinking out loud. That's all I  
needed to know. Thank you, sir."   
  
Sisko nodded. "You're welcome. Please tell Vicki Ann that I hope she's feeling better."   
  
Julian replied, "I will." As he walked out of Sisko's office, he muttered, "She'd better be  
sick, otherwise, she's got a lot of explaining to do."   
  
Vicki Ann glanced around the room, checking to make sure she hadn't missed anything.  
She then walked through the other room, making sure none of her things were still there.  
None. Everything was packed.   
  
She sighed and went to get her suitcase. I really should leave Julian a note or  
something. No, better not to explain myself. I can make up some kind of excuse otherwise,  
such as Captain Picard or Beverly needed me back on the Enterprise. If I write something  
now, it would be too emotional. She heard the doors to the quarters open and she  
sighed.   
  
Great. Julian's back. Boy, have I got some explaining to do.   
  
"Vicki Ann!" Julian called from the other room.   
  
Uh-oh. He doesn't sound very happy, in fact, he sounds angry.   
Vicki Ann let down her barriers a bit to check. I was right. He's mad. At me. She quickly  
composed herself and went into the other room. "Yes?" she asked, perfectly normal.   
  
"What happened today? Two people told me that you were ill or upset after meeting with  
Sisko."   
  
"Who told you that?"   
  
"Miles saw you leave and he said you looked upset. Sisko said you became ill while in his  
office."   
  
"Oh," Vicki Ann replied, wringing her hands.   
  
"Well, which was it? Were you upset or sick?"   
  
"I-I- I got sick. I skipped lunch and you know I don't eat much for breakfast. I came back  
here and got something to eat and I was fine."   
  
Julian didn't look convinced. "Are you sure that's all?"   
  
"Yes."   
  
Julian smiled. "Good. I'm glad you're feeling better. I thought we could have a nice quiet  
dinner here and spend some time together before your shift." He started to walk into the  
bedroom.   
  
Vicki Ann ran in front of him. "Shouldn't you be in the infirmary?"   
  
Julian replied, "Everything's done. There's nothing to do. No one needs me today."   
  
"Are you sure? Shouldn't you be there just in case?"   
  
"Are you trying to get rid of me?" Julian teased.   
  
"No," Vicki Ann replied quickly. "No, I just wanted to make sure it was alright."   
  
Julian nodded and walked past her into the bedroom.   
  
Vicki Ann searched her mind for an excuse to stop him. She found nothing. Besides, it was  
too late.   
  
"Vicki Ann," Julian said.   
  
He sounded rather calm. She was surprised. "What?"   
  
"Come here," he replied, rather forcefully.   
  
She slowly walked into the bedroom. "Yes?"   
  
"What's this?" he asked, pointing to the suitcase. "Why are your things packed?"   
  
I guess now is as good as any time to tell him, Vicki Ann thought to herself. She picked up  
her suitcase. "I'm leaving."   
  
"What?" Julian asked, shocked.   
  
"I'm leaving," she repeated.   
  
"Why?"   
  
"I can't do this," she replied, her eyes swelling with tears.   
  
"You can't do what?"   
  
"I can't take the job on your staff. I can't stay here."   
  
"Why? You said you loved the station. You also said you loved working in medicine   
again." He went over to her. "What's wrong?"   
  
She pulled away from him. "I told you I can't do this."   
  
"But you said-."   
  
"I know what I said! And I meant it. I do love the station and I do love working in medicine  
again, but I'm not ready for what comes with the job."   
  
"And what is that?"   
  
"You."   
  
"What do you mean?"   
  
"I'm not ready to stay here with you permanently."   
  
Julian was hurt, but he tried to make things better. "We could get you separate quarters."   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "And how long would that go on? Forever? No, Julian. I think it's  
best if I go back to the Enterprise."   
  
"No, Vicki Ann. We can get through this. Just like we did everything else."   
  
"I need some time, Julian. Some time away from you. I can't do that here."   
  
Julian's jaw clenched. "Fine. You take all the time you need.   
You can take eternity for all I care!" he said, bitterly, turning away from her.   
  
Vicki Ann hesitated, not knowing whether she should leave or try to straighten things out  
with Julian.   
  
Julian turned to her and screamed, "Go!"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded, the tears falling at warp speed, and left.   
  
After Vicki Ann left Julian's quarters, she composed herself and wiped the tears off her  
face. She went to Sisko's office. "May I speak to you for a moment, Captain?   
  
"Sure. Sit down," Sisko replied.   
  
Vicki Ann shook her head. "No, thank you. I can only stay a minute. I just came to tell you  
that I can't take the position on Julian's staff. I'm going back to the Enterprise."   
  
Sisko noticed that her eyes were red, probably from crying.   
Perhaps she and Julian broke up. he thought to himself. "Alright. Thank you for telling  
me. When are you leaving?"   
  
"I spoke to the captain of the Hyde. They're willing to take me to meet the Enterprise on  
their way to Earth."   
  
Sisko nodded. "Very well." He stood and walked over to her. "It's been a pleasure having  
you on the station and I hope you'll come back and visit us again," he said, reaching out  
to shake her hand.   
  
Vicki Ann smiled and shook his hand. And although she doubted if she would be coming  
back, she said, "I will. Goodbye, captain."   
  
"Have a safe trip."   
  
"Thank you, sir." She turned and left the office. As she neared the turbolift, Kira stepped  
out.   
  
"Hello, Vicki Ann." She noticed the luggage and added. "What's going on, you're not  
leaving, are you?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded sadly. "It's time for me to go back to the Enterprise. Dr. Crusher has  
asked me to return since the Enterprise has entered the war."   
  
"I take it you've decided not to take the position here." When Vicki Ann nodded, Kira  
asked, "Why not?"   
  
Kira noticed her new friend's hesitation. "Did something happen between you and Julian?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded. "Yes, but I don't want to talk about it."   
  
"That's alright. I'm not Ezri. I won't make you talk about it. But, if you ever want to. . ."   
  
"Maybe one day, but not now."   
  
Kira smiled and patted her on the arm. "Have a safe trip. And when you end up in battle,  
please stay in sickbay. And stay alive."   
  
"Yes, sir," Vicki Ann replied, smiling and saluting. "It's time for me to go."   
  
"Goodbye, Vicki Ann. And good luck."   
  
"You, too. Goodbye, Kira."   
  
"Nerys. Call me Nerys."   
  
"Goodbye, Nerys."   
  
As Vicki Ann passed by Ops, O'Brien asked, "Are you leaving the station, Doctor?"   
  
Vicki Ann smiled at him, although she didn't feel like smiling.   
"Yes. I'm going back to the Enterprise."   
  
O'Brien returned the smile. "Well, goodbye. And tell everyone hello when you get back."   
  
"I will. Goodbye, Chief." She walked to the docking ring. On her way, she ran into Ezri.   
  
"Where are you going?" Ezri asked.   
  
"I'm going back to the Enterprise."   
  
"Why? You were so happy here, being with Julian and working in medicine again. What  
happened?"   
  
"It's a long story, Ezri and I really don't feel like going into it right now."   
  
"Don't worry, I think I know what it is. It's the fear of commitment thing again, isn't it?"   
  
Vicki Ann nodded.   
  
"You know, Vicki Ann. This is the worst thing you can do. You have to face your fears and  
deal with them, not run away from them. This could be the biggest mistake of your life."   
  
"I know that Ezri, but for some reason, this feels right. I have to do this, Ezri."   
  
Ezri nodded sadly. "Alright. It's your decision." She hugged her friend. "We'll miss you,  
especially me. It was nice having you around."   
  
"I'll miss you too, Ezri. I'm sorry, but I have to leave now, or I'll miss my ride."   
  
"Bye, Vicki Ann."   
  
"Bye, Ezri." Vicki Ann turned away, hiding her tears, as she continued to the docking ring.   
  
The End of part two   
  
To be continued in part three. . .   
--   
May the real muses guide you and sprinkle you with magic writing dust:-)   
  
Meghan Elizabeth   
  
Visit my site:   
http://www.crosswinds.net/~meghanelizabeth/  
  
Need a beta reader? Visit the Muses Sector at:  
http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Dreamworld/1481/   



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